Can you write an amusing paragraph or more, that includes these phrases?

Question

1. I think there's a gremlin on the wing of the plane!!!
2. Have you ever been taught the English language?...I think, not.
3. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
4. I refuse to eat junk food.
5. Not unless the love of my life is calling me...
6. Oh yeah, you blend.

Answer 1

On the long flight back home. I was seated next to a foreigner. After trying to have a decent conversation with him, I finally asked ,"HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TAUGHT THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE?... I THINK NOT." The flight attendant came down the aisle asking if we wanted peanuts, I responded, "No thank you, I REFUSE TO EAT JUNK FOOD." She said."You do look fit...OH YEAH, YOU BLEND exercise and diet well, into your life...Hey...I THINK THERE IS A GREMLIN ON THE WING OF THE PLANE!!! By the way would you like to go for a drink after we land?" I just looked at her and said, "NOT UNLESS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE IS CALLING ME to break up. You see we've been fighting and I don't think she wants to be with me anymore, I know I've grown tired of her, well...THAT'S MY STORY AND I'M STICKING TO IT."
:-)