Should divorce be so exceptable?

Question

You would think as a culture that has the ability to get married a lot smarter, we wouldn't be making it a 60% failer rate that it is today. Why is divorce OK? Do we have that little respect for committment? Is the best were ever gonna do is one night stand's and every other meaningless sexual act you can of? Are we that shallow and self centered? Is actually having to work at something just overrated? Because from what I know, marriage isn't suppose to a bad thing. Feel free to comment.

Answer 1

Divorce is a legal decree, why shouldn't it be accepted when we accept:

unmarried women having children

unmarried men and woman shacked up together

unmarried people living to gether and allowing child visitation in such a household

ex wife's to take complete control of the children, not allow a lousy visitation of only twice a month, and still insist on child support

ex wife's to move more than 15 minutes away from the children's father

ex wife's to alienate the father from his own children

making a man pay child support payments for a child because the woman gets "accidentally" pregnant

allow woman to collect welfare, but a man in the situation does not qualify

Answer 2

The 60% failure rate is often reported, but the most accurate statistics I've seen are around 40%...which is still horrifying.

I think the issue stems from an overreaction to the difficulty in getting divorces (and the stigma attached to it); around the 1970s no-fault divorce was introduced in North America and suddenly it became very acceptable.

What really bothers me, though, is the phrase "starter marriage" - the idea that you should get married when you're young, learn from it, and then get divorced.

I wish it were harder to get a divorce. Certainly for me (a Catholic) it's more difficult than usual. Perhaps we could have levels of marriage - a five year contract which could be extended to a lifetime marriage only after the five years was up? That would cut down severely on the number of failed marriages.

Answer 3

In some ways I agree with you on some of the issues but you have to realize people have grown fed up with the drama that married life has given them. You think that it is easy to work something out? No not when you both don't see things on the same level, and what about the things that caused the problems in the first place do you think that it is going to go away? No...I have tried to talk and talk and talk and things still come back to the same I want to bring my marriage back full of life again but I know that it is me that is the problem and that is the problem here too no one wants to be honest about anything anymore, not about themselves and certainly not about married life either.
Things have gotten bad when both the people haven't reached a common ground one goes one way and the other goes another way and that is the reason why it is they way it is...You ask why divorce is the easy way out, that is because it was made convenient to do and that is the simple truth instead of wanting to work it out divorce is there option as well as moving around and cheating on each other is the other option.
I have committed myself to my marriage for a long time and I have to tell you that it is a rough and sometimes good thing but what happens after a period of time when you get tired of asking the questions and answering the questions and doing all you need to do and all of that then what?
We are still back to square one!

Answer 4

The laws for divorces should be reinforced, they should have limits on the reasons for divorce ie infidelity, abuse, drugs other than those factors I honestly can see no reason for divorces. Marriage is work and if you go into it thinking otherwise you have delusions. Its a job both spouses need to participate in. You don't get married thinking well hell, if this doesn't work I can divorce. Its a committment for life not a month or a year, counselling should be par for the course BEFORE you exchange vows to see if you will even last!!

Answer 5

because people base their love and commitment on conditions, we all get older, heavier, we won't always look the same as when we were first married. people base their love on lust, and lust doesn't last. people are so into what the person can do for them, instead of what they can do to help their mate realize their dreams. most people now throw things away when they don't work anymore, instead of reworking them. most people will not take any responsibility for any wrongs, too easy to pin it on the other guy. easier to just avoid that person. marriage is suppose to be a good thing, where u can trust, feel safe, and have a helpmate through life. but it is no crime to steal someones mate, or ruin someones marriage, they have no respect for their mates, or their self, there is no manual on marriage, there are usually no second chances either when a mate leaves and finds someone new. real love is not based on sex, or lust, or money, or how a person looks, it is based on caring about that other person and staying with them, in spite of problems, because storms pass, and through these storms, right around the corner is hope and change, and love, but most people just move on and keep moving on because of selfishness.

Answer 6

Society has made divorce acceptable and people are more willing to throw away what they have rather than to work for it. Marriage is a institution and you have to work hard to continue at making it good if not great. For me it is a sacred thing and for others it doesn't mean much. I believe that most people these days don't have much respect for marriage (let alone each other) even though they continue to get married. Good luck on your survey! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

Answer 7

Marriage shouldn't be taken lightly but to many people go into it thinking that "If this doesn't work out we can always get a divorce." That to me is saying that person doesn't want to work it out. Marriage isn't easy and there will be fights but you have to want to work it out. My husband and I've been through a lot of fights in the past 4 years that we've been together and both of us have admitted that we wanted to give up but because we didn't want to and we wanted to work it out we stayed and fought and we will continue to do. You see the only way I think that divorce is ok is if one cheats on the other or they both do. I grew up with both my parents being married and they are still married today. My husband's parents have been divorced since he was 2 so we grew up with two difference views of marriage but he agrees with me that he wants to get married once and stay married. I know we'd never cheat on each other. Divorce is way to high today because people give up to easily and marry the wrong people. The reason why I know that i didn't marry the wrong one was because god had brought him into my life and with god in control of our lives we both knew we were soulmates. To many people think that they should go for what they want rather then what they need but they don't. So what I'm saying is if people would just not go into marriage thinking that and they wanted to fight rather then give up when something goes wrong then the divorce rating won't be so high. It's more sadder when there's children involved. Just because ones parents didn't make it doesn't mean they won't that's another excuse people use. If you think that you might aswell stay single and avoid having to get a divorce in the future. Only get married if you want to fight and you don't want to give up or else you wasted your time. That's my view on divorce.

Answer 8

I don't think it should be so acceptable, I think it should be harder to get married and divorced. I think couples rush into marriage, like the first or second year of dating is rushing the marriage. I think that's what's causing so many divorces, their not really getting to know the person as much as they should. And I think they should have to go through some kind of counseling before divorce. Marriage is something you really have to WORK at. For both people. I't s not easy. COMPROMISE! I was trying to be the boss, and what I was doing was pushing my husband away, Finally I had to step aside and let him in, we had to compromise! Pluse we all made vows, 'through good and bad, till death do us part' That should mean something to people! It does for me

Answer 9

i'm interior the comparable concern. My divorce would be very final in April. i attempted relationship returned in December, yet a number of of the ladies i became relationship wanted to get right into a intense relationship perfect away. i desperate i did not choose that right this moment - there are particular issues that i prefer to do for myself in the past I dedicate returned to something intense (i.e. probably bypass to regulation college, run a marathon,...). as properly, I surely have 2 babies (9 and 7) and that i don't prefer to thrust a clean person into their international in simple terms yet (in assessment to their mom LOL). hence, I surely have desperate to place relationship on the returned burner in the intervening time (later this 12 months) and that i'm in simple terms going to relish being single. yet remember, anybody is different. in case you experience which you're waiting and you have got here upon somebody particular, there is not something incorrect with relationship her. suitable of success to you!

Answer 10

Yes, you can't punish two people who made a mistake, and force them to stay married. Better that they move on and try to find happiness somewhere else. Marriage should be made harder...that way you are absolutely sure you want to commit to this person.