my husband has stated many times that he wanted to leave me or went out ALOT and wasn't open with me anymore. Yes, I have put up with a lot, more than I probably should have. I'm only trying to be a good wife in sticking things out until I am absolutely sure and tired of the situation becasue I do lovemy husband. But now I am beginning to feel that I want to leave even though thngs have been going pretty well between us. if he was so into talking to other women or wanting to leave, why do you think he just didn't do it? Also, why do you think I am rehashing things in our past (a few months ago) when things are supposed to be better. Shouldn't I be happy things are better?
2006-12-16 02:41:54 · 11 answers · asked by Kisses 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Do you have children? Sometimes men don't want to leave when there are children involved. Or else they are too chicken to leave as they know they are unhappy but don't really know why so they blame you.
I would try going to marriage counselling and see if that helps. If you are unhappy also, think to yourself if this is worth it - if this is how you want to live the rest of your life? It is your choice and your life I personally woulnd't want to stay like that so I would try marriage counselling and if that fails, try a trial separation. Good luck and Merry Christmas!
2006-12-16 02:47:24 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My now ex husband used to do the same thing. Later he said he did it because he DIDNT want to leave and thought that if I was afraid he would leave that I would stay and work really hard at making him happy so as not to lose him. It was a complete reverse pschycology thing. Things were going better between us too, but I realized that I was still sitting there wondering when he would be unhappy again and start talking about leaving. Leaving him was the hardest decision I have ever made, but now I am happy and him and I are becoming friends. You cant let things go because as women, that's what we do. And it hurt you when he said those things. You will carry that with you forever
2006-12-16 10:49:26 · answer #2 · answered by ♥ Ladylike ♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are going over the things that bother you...normal. Maybe things aren't resolved between you and you still need answers. If you want to stay together then get some help together....it might help when telling someone outside your relationship whats happen and how your feeling...sometime enough is enough and no matter how much you want it to work cuz it's what you think is the right thing to do is not always a good thing...you know yourself best and if you done then leave if you think there is hope then get help...good luck.
2006-12-16 10:49:15 · answer #3 · answered by deadshscott 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe he isn't ready to leave u yet, in my own marriage when things began to get better, and the fighting stopped, and i really believed we were going to talk things over and forgive the past, he walked in one day and asked for a divorce, and he had been seeing the other woman for over a year, but their plans were not finalized, and he wasn't ready using me yet, so i began to get this false sense of security, began to feel love for him again, and than he walks out, never knew he had been cheating, all seemed OK to me. i would wonder why things are better, my own point of view. could be things did not work out with the other person he was with, and he doesn't like being alone. i only wish i had left him earlier, we always think if the fighting has stopped that all is well, and will be well, could just be the calm before the storm. if he spoke about leaving, means it was on his mind. could be he isn't ready yet, and needs more time, as was in my case. the other woman had to get rid of her husband first before they could be together.
2006-12-16 13:56:10 · answer #4 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's comfortable. He gets to have his cake, and eat it too. How can a woman say "I love this man" when he treats you less than wonderful ? I don't understand. You love someone who treats you like crap? He's secretive, and obviously has no problem hurting you by tellilng you he's wanted to leave. Hold the door open for him....and kick him to the curb. Obviously things are NOT better - or you'd be happy.
2006-12-16 10:50:24 · answer #5 · answered by Bondgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you want to leave you need to leave. otherwise you are turning into him. if you want to stay with him because things are better then do it, but they may not stay that way. don't fool yourself.
he didn't leave because he knew he could get away with what he was doing and you wouldn't do anything about it. i was in the same situation, until i did something about it.
2006-12-16 10:47:58 · answer #6 · answered by pikachu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's very immature and doesn't know what he wants. Don't waste your life waiting for him to grow up. You're the only one that can make yourself happy.
2006-12-16 10:51:57 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because he loves u.If he didn't he would have left already.He knows that he loves u but he just doesn't want to show it like the way u show him.
2006-12-16 10:47:24 · answer #8 · answered by pink_15_gurl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At some point he will leave.
2006-12-16 10:53:23 · answer #9 · answered by S K 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes
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2006-12-16 10:50:48 · answer #10 · answered by mr johnson 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋