Dear friends in college i had friendship with a girl. slowlly she started loving me and she proposed me also. but i dont have any emotions or feelings to love her because i just thought her just as a friend but she argues that i behaved with her closely because i love her.
Now my engagement has been over 6 months ago and i love my fiancee(ie.with whom i m engaged) so much and our marriage is fixed. Now my college friend disturbs me and blackmails me. I can understand her love for me but when i am not interested, then she should avoid me. what can i do now..
2006-12-16 02:19:36 · 16 answers · asked by PH 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
if there is no choice than tell everything to ur fiance abt the behaviour of the gal......if she understands u than u no need to worry about the blackmail stuff n the gal......or else speak frankly to the gal n tell her that if she behaves in this way she will loose ur friendship........n when u know that ur right than y do u fear.....anyways gud luck
2006-12-16 03:50:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you were involved with her sexually and became intimate and close, what else would you think she would believe?????
If it was not intimate then you have nothing to be sorry for....
You are on a two-sided sword here.... you had better do something before you fall and get hurt.....
It is a crime to blackmail someone , and if she is doing this , you must immediately inform the police on campus or at the local office.If she is harassing and stalking you , this is also a crime and she needs to be reported.....
If you were obligated or chosen for someone else you should not have started up a relationship with anyone at college.. Intimacy, is not taken lightly by most females.. You have used her, she is hurt, angry and now wants to get back at you for your behaviour.
I still believe this is criminal and I would report her and get a peace bond against her... You need to come clean and tell all to the Police if you want help.
By the way, your behaviour was not considerate, respectful or acceptable either, so don't think you weren't in the wrong here.
2006-12-16 02:40:35 · answer #2 · answered by doclakewrite 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she were a true friend then she would want you to be happy. Even if that meant not being with her.
It may take some time, but for now you should let her have her space. She'll probably call and e-mail and be obsessive, don't avoid her, just don't go out of your way to get in contact with her. Soon she'll realize that things will be better off if you stay just friends, or she will decide never to speak to you again, then a few monts later decide that was silly and talk again.
You can't help who you fall in love with, and neither can she.
2006-12-16 02:23:50 · answer #3 · answered by M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put a distance between the friend and stay true to your commitments engagement is a commitment legal and binding in USA people do get sued over it , it may be good to take legal advice.
Let your fiancee know and explain what is going on tell her that you are committed to the engagement so you need her support. Go from there.
2006-12-16 09:04:11 · answer #4 · answered by minootoo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you can do is to call her and tell her that you don't hate and love her but a mere friendship relationship is between you and her. Convince to understand that now that you are engaged, that you can have an external relationship with anybody and don't explain this by quarrelling with her, just explain gently and carefully because she may decided to hurt you and your fiance.
May God help you.
2006-12-16 02:30:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Disturbing you and blackmailing you are not signs of love. She is obsessed. It is not your fault. Tell her you are sorry if you lead her on, but you have no feelings beyond friendship for her. Then leave her alone. If you don't want the whole package, don't play with the bow.
2006-12-16 02:23:31 · answer #6 · answered by bonnie b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. You have a psycho on your hands. First thing you should do is , if you haven't already, share all this with your fiancee so she knows what's going on. If this "spurned woman" persists in her harassment of you, you'll do well to contact some legal assistance- I hope you have made things very clear to her that you do love your bride to be and that she (bothersome one) is never going to stand a chance with you.Best of luck to you!
2006-12-16 02:26:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
both of u r not wrong on ur part ,actually its her misunderstanding so u should try to remove it.tell her that u r engagaed vd sm1 nd even then if she blackmails u then tel ur fiancee about her clearly
guide her ,make her understand that u r not made 4 her
i know slowly-slowly she will understand the situation .give her smtime .
2006-12-16 02:30:37 · answer #8 · answered by garima 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is blackmailin u & callin u...den her luv 4 u isnt true...she is jst desperate 2 get sum1 2 luv if it was true she wud hav respected ur decission & ur feelings...tel her honestly dat u don luv her...& if she continues u vil even break d relation of a frend vit her & ask her 2 find sum1 who vil luv her & take better care of her as u cant force sum1 2 luv u!!!!
2006-12-16 03:41:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your english is alittle baffled, but I think i get it. You must've boned this girl if she's blackmailing and harrassing you. Details my friend, details. You're telling us a whole lot of nothing. No one can manipulate if they have nothing to work with. Since you obviously f*cked up, tell her to go ahead and tell. Then tell your fiance, "I don't love her Ma!"
2006-12-16 02:38:26 · answer #10 · answered by wildblackflower 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋