Very smart girl, she's the top of her class and her teacher actually says that she probally should be In the next grade but her performance around the house Is horrible. No chores get done, I cant get her to make her bed or ever clean her room. Her teacher says she's her top helper In class. The thing Is I'm not easy on her I take t.v. time away, or I'll try no computer or no after dinner snacks and she still wakes up the next day and we start all over? Is there something Im doing wrong.
I think my biggest problem Is when she has company and we clean the whole house she lets her friends tear back up the house and go home and then she Is left with the mess....Oh I really don't understand that because she knows how hard she had to work to get her company to come over.....any suggestions?
2006-12-15 16:04:05 · 12 answers · asked by passion 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I think you're doing a great job. Nowadays people let their kids get away with too much. She is the kid and you're the adult. It's good that she's doing great in school...shows she has sense. By you taking away her tv time and the like when she's naughty or whatever would allow her to realize that there are consequences for bad behavior or whatever the crime might be at the time.
I think children need to learn about consequences early in life so that they can grow up to be responsible adults. And i will say it again, you are not being hard on her. You're being her mother. You're not there to be her friend.
Regarding her friends coming over and messing up your house. Let the kids clean up before they leave otherwise they can't come over and play any more. She can go over to their house and rip their house apart. Your house, your rules. And if her friends don't want to conform to the "let's clean up after we play" rule then don't let them in your house. Meet at a playground or someone else's house. People raise their kids differently but you need to stand your ground as to what is allowed in YOUR house.
Remember too...kids are kids ...whether they are smart or not. So your daughter will mess up and may even do so repeatedly. Just keep doing what you're doing and in time she will see the connection between being bad and no snack time and change her behavior accordingly.
Good luck.
2006-12-15 16:55:54 · answer #1 · answered by inciespider 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a 17 year old son and I had the same problems with him when he was young. I asked for advice and was told that instead of punishing him by taking things away I should do the opposite. Tell her if she does this or that she will get rewarded. If she makes her bed she gets an extra half hour of watching t.v. or whatever. Positive reinforcement is your best bet.
2006-12-16 00:12:56 · answer #2 · answered by Sweetness 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her if her friends tears up the clean room then, she has to clean it and they will not be able to come over for about a week and let her know this will happen each time! She will get the drift... she is testing you and you are losing! Mean what you say and do what you say!
2006-12-16 00:08:20 · answer #3 · answered by MagikButterfly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Heart instead of entertaining at home once in a while, have an outing with your daughter and enjoy yourself spending quality time together.
Another suggestion, you could perhaps sit down with your daughter and explain that it is not right to let her friends tear back up the house and go home. They are abusing her good heart. Instead of punishing her, try to do things WITH her and become friend with your daughter. Treat her like an adult and build a strong bond with her. She is a bright girl and try to encourage her in doing something she likes. Do it with her. Work as a team!
I believe it is worth to try it, don't you ?
2006-12-16 00:17:12 · answer #4 · answered by montralia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her be a 6 year old child. Sure she should have chores and things but just enjoy her while you can. Try to make things fun for her, make a game out of it. Most of all just spend time together and love her for who she is.
2006-12-16 00:08:34 · answer #5 · answered by tish s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before her friends leave make her clean it up while they are there. Maybe she will learn take care of what she has and her finds would be more considerate next time they come over. Maybe the will help her clean then they will really understand next time they come over what is expected. You mess up you clean up.
2006-12-16 00:19:17 · answer #6 · answered by Smile 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're expecting a lot out of a 6 year old. it's great that you have her starting to do chores but you still need to help her. most of the kids around us start doing chores by themselves about 8 or so. someone in the previous answers said to make a game out of it. that's a great idea. if you don't make it fun- at that age- they won't do it
2006-12-16 02:06:03 · answer #7 · answered by missy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she is only a baby even making the bed at her age is to tough i think
let her be a child
later on a few choirs or even now she can pick up her toys & at the weekend put a few dishes away but if you are tough as nails with her she will hate you later & not want to have any time with you
so you reap what you sow
2006-12-16 00:11:48 · answer #8 · answered by ausblue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes,you are !She is a child.
You have great expectations from 6 years old child!
You must have been a perfect child at that age !
Just be glad she is top at school.
2006-12-16 00:19:20 · answer #9 · answered by greβ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
shes doing very wel in school cut her a little more slack for two or more years and see how things turn out then really crack down her but you need to go with your best instinct.
2006-12-16 00:11:50 · answer #10 · answered by laci 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋