Im 19. LIve with my super strict parents. Advice?

Question

Asking for some advice:

So Im 19 and my curfew is around 11 pm. I rarely get the permission to drive my car at night(this is always a fight or argument to get permission to drive at night). Incredibly strict rules. I think Im mature enough to do a lot of stuff.

Note: Not to brag but Im a 4.00 second year student with chemistry as my major. I think Ive proven my maturity.

Im thinking about joining the Air Force

Answer 1

join the Air Force

Answer 2

I thought I was the only one!!! I joined the Navy at 19 to get away from my parents. Without really talking to you and getting more info I can't really suggest what you should do, so I'll give you a few options. Join the Air Force ( do not join the Navy, I wish I would have joined the Air Force) if your parents are so strict that they take your car away from you at 19, and make it impossible for you to save money to move out. Or if your only problem with your parents is the curfew and you have a job so you can set money aside, then I would say stick it out until you graduate from college. But let me tell you, I feel your pain, I speak from experience.

Answer 3

Parents sometimes are scared of what could happen to their children, by giving you a curfew, they make sure that they can sleep at night and not worry . However they seem to have done a good job in raising you since you are a good student and you listen to what they ask you to do, may be they could consider that the job is done and that you can take over from now on. Joining the Air Force would be a bit like passing the whip from your parents hands to your Superior's but you look like you have all the training to cope with it!

Answer 4

If they are paying for college then you kinda need to suck it up and deal with most of it. Maybe sit down and talk to them about it and explain your issues like a calm adult.

If you are paying for college or have a job - move out. then you set your own rules.

Oh and if you think that the air force won't have as many rules - you are way off. That will be a whole new world of strict.

Sometimes its nice though to have Mom an dad at home when you need them.. so think long and hard before you leave if you aren't through with school.

And also - maybe the reason why you are doing so well is because of these rules - you weren't off partying and getting drunk like the majority of college kids :).

Answer 5

Go ahead and brag that's a great average! :)

Don't join the Air Force, finish school. Are your parents paying your tuition? Are they allowing you to live in their house free of charge? How about food and phone calls and utilities? Are they covering all of that? Does you mom still do your laundry and put it in your room for you? I'm guessing the answer to at least SOME of these questions is "yes".

THAT said, you're legally an adult but you're still underage for all the drinking and bar and club scenes, so what do you need to be doing out past 11pm anyway?? Get home and go to bed so you can maintain that kick *** average.

Whose car is it? is it THEIR car that you borrow when you need it or is it actually YOUR car? If it's their car, then you're out of luck, they want it in the driveway by 11 then that's where it needs to be. If it's your car then you should try to talk to them about the idea that legally, you're allowed to be out on the roads at night and when you have plans with friends you will be smart, responsible, and careful when you're out.

Answer 6

Here is the deal. Your parents are as they are due to not wanting you to fail. Over-protective, demanding parents usually want better for their children than they had for themselves.

1) Is there any religious reasons they are so strict?

2) If you are a 4.0 than they expect you to be at home studying to be a "perfect graduate".

My advise would be to you would be to work out with them you living on campus "because it would be better for you and your education"

If they dont let you take your car no biggie, you dont need one living at school.

You mentioned that you are a second year student and at this point if you are at a JC then you will need to transfer to a University. Hopefully you dont live so close that you can commute.

Although your thought of joining the Air Force are a benefit to our Nation please reconsider until you graduate. With a Chemistry degree you may be able to enter at a higher rank.

Dont get me wrong, any man that enlists is a hero for our country but dont do it to run away from you partents.

Take the time to discuss with them you concerns. It may be harry to get through the discussion but you are a smart person, use your wits and be strong. If you can site good reason to trust you then their responsiblity to you is to allow you to grow as an adult.

I would be proud if you were my second year student pulling a 4.0

PS - I am a parent of a second year student and I know the effort it takes to get the grades etc.

Answer 7

stay in school and tough it out you are probably that good of a student because you are home early they want what they see is best for you, let 'em in two short years you will be out of there and can do what you want.

Two years at 19 is an eternity but to someone my age they are a single second. Try to gently and diplomatically get your point across about things then since you live under their roof give in gracefully if you don't win..... practice the art of negotiation with them and see if you can not becomes skilled at that art.... it will serve you all of your life and congrats on the 4.0 you have no idea how important that will prove to you later but only if you finish maybe start writing a book at night and send it out to some publisher when it is done... if you are going to be there anyway get creative and go for it hang tight.... it is almost over.......

Answer 8

Those who pay the bills hold the power.
Move out on your own if you can't "handle it"
But I think a better idea is to live with it until you are done with college and just focus on school.
It's gotta suck, still being considered the "kid", but you will be a lot better off staying at home and just dealing for a few more years. Good Degree = Good Money and you can live however you like at that point.
Joining the air force at this point might be a bit extreme, unless it's a desire.
Freedom and responsibility isn't all it's cracked up to be.

Answer 9

I'm sorry to hear about your family situation. I joined the Air Force at 18 to get away from home, but today you have to also think about the war in Iraq. Do you think the US is accomplishing anything in Iraq? Are you willing to go to Iraq and fight for what the US is trying to do there? Are you willing to lose an eye, an arm, a leg or your life for your country? Almost everyone in the active military, guard, and reserve today have been to Iraq and most more than once. Keep in mind that bed check in Iraq is at sunset.

Answer 10

well congrats with the whole school thing! that's awesome.
one reason for your parent's strictness is because they want you to focus on your studies, which you clearly have. talk to your parents about the Air force, it's a big step no matter who you are. my fiance wanted to join the AF but it took over 1 1/2 years to get in, so he just went ARMY instead. sit down with your parents explain to them that you are not a child anymore and should be old enough to make your own curfew and such. respect them and don't freak out, that will show some maturity. good luck!

Answer 11

Well, you aren't going to get your freedom in the Air Force. You'd be going from bad to worse and too quickly. (meaning your freedom- time to spread your wings-nothing bad about the USAF)

I think your parents just worry, it's a crazy world we live in. If you aren't old enough to drink, where do you want to go after 11?

You do need some freedom, because you sound like you're being suffocated. Try to talk with the parent who is more approachable, and ask to have your curfew extended to midnight. That would be a start.

Good Luck!