All you people who know the Holy Bible?

Question

Here's my question, and I'd prefer an answer backed up w/ a scripture if possible. I am in my 2nd marriage, and my husband is too. We are currently seperated for a couple of different reasons. I am taking our seperation as a time for us to get our lives right with God. I don't know His purpose for me or for him. But I do know that this seperation has a purpose. Or at least I believe it does. He looks at it as God saying this marriage is not what God has for him. I know God has not told him that (I can't explain why with only 400 characters left), but he is so discouraged because he doesn't have what he wants right now that he is only looking at things negatively. He asked me "How could God be in this marriage when he disobeyed him by divorcing his first wife" As if our marriage just could not be blessed by God. I don't know how to answer him without it being my opinion. Before I married him I asked God and he told me yes. I don't know if he asked God or not. Anybody have any suggestion

Answer 1

First of all, no matter what view one takes in the issue of divorce it is important to remember the words of the Bible from Malachi 2:16a: “I hate divorce, says the Lord God of Israel.” According to the Bible, God’s plan is that marriage be a lifetime commitment. “So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate” (Matthew 19:6). God realizes, though, that since a marriage involves two sinful human beings, divorce is going to occur. In the Old Testament, He laid down some laws in order to protect the rights of divorcees, especially women (Deuteronomy 24:1-4). Jesus pointed out that these laws were given because of the hardness of people’s hearts, not because they were God’s desire (Matthew 19:8).



The controversy over whether divorce and remarriage is allowed according to the Bible revolves primarily around Jesus’ words in Matthew 5:32 and 19:9. The phrase “except for marital unfaithfulness” is the only thing in Scripture that possibly gives God’s permission for divorce and remarriage. Many interpreters understand this "exception clause" as referring to "marital unfaithfulness" during the "betrothal" period. In Jewish custom, a man and a woman were considered married even while they were still engaged “betrothed.” Immorality during this "betrothal" period would then be the only valid reason for a divorce.



However, the Greek word translated “marital unfaithfulness” is a word which can mean any form of sexual immorality. It is can mean fornication, prostitution, adultery, etc. Jesus is possibly saying that divorce is permissible if sexual immorality is committed. Sexual relations is such an integral part of the marital bond “the two will become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24; Matthew 19:5; Ephesians 5:31). Therefore, a breaking of that bond by sexual relations outside of marriage might be a permissible reason for divorce. If so, Jesus also has remarriage in mind in this passage. The phrase “and marries another” (Matthew 19:9) indicates that divorce and remarriage are allowed in an instance of the exception clause, whatever it is interpreted to be. It is important to note that only the innocent party is allowed to remarry. Although it is not stated in the text, the allowance for remarriage after a divorce is God’s mercy for the one who was sinned against, not for the one who committed the sexual immorality. There may be instances where the "guilty party" is allowed to remarry - but no such concept is taught in this text.



Some understand 1 Corinthians 7:15 as another “exception,” allowing remarriage if an unbelieving spouse divorces a believer. However, the context does not mention remarriage, but only says a believer is not bound to continue a marriage if an unbelieving spouse wants to leave. Others claim that abuse (spousal or child) are valid reasons for divorce even though they are not listed as such in the Bible. While this may very well be the case, it is never wise to presume upon the Word of God.



Sometimes lost in the debate over the exception clause is the fact that whatever “marital unfaithfulness” means, it is an allowance for divorce, not a requirement for divorce. Even when adultery is committed a couple can, through God’s grace, learn to forgive and begin rebuilding their marriage. God has forgiven us of so much more. Surely we can follow His example and even forgive the sin of adultery (Ephesians 4:32). However, in many instances, a spouse is unrepentant and continues in sexual immorality. That is where Matthew 19:9 can possibly be applied. Many also look too quickly to remarriage after a divorce when God might desire them to remain single. God sometimes calls a person to be single so that their attention is not divided (1 Corinthians 7:32-35). Remarriage after a divorce may be an option in some circumstances, but that does not mean it is the only option.



It is distressing that the divorce rate among professing Christians is nearly as high as that of the unbelieving world. The Bible makes it abundantly clear that God hates divorce (Malachi 2:16) and that reconciliation and forgiveness should be the marks of a believer’s life (Luke 11:4; Ephesians 4:32). However, God recognizes that divorces will occur, even among His children. A divorced and/or remarried believer should not feel any less loved by God, even if their divorce and/or remarriage is not covered under the possible exception clause of Matthew 19:9. God often uses even the sinful disobedience of Christians to accomplish great good.

Answer 2

You got sufficient scripture from the first answer. All I wanted to add was that God is merciful and forgiving, even when we go contrary to his will. He gives us second chances so if you chose to remarry this is your second opportunity to do it God's way. One thing about being a christian is the hope that we have even when things aren't exactly how we want them to be we know that God has a purpose for us and that all things work together for good. Put God first in your marriage, maybe instead of doing it separately you need to go to bible study together and pray together but make sure you both want the same things. He could be making excuses b/c he don't want to be married, I don't know but the idea that God is not in your marriage because he's been divorced don't make any sense. I'm sure he's done other things, fornicated, lied etc so does that mean that God just ain't in him period? Maybe he believes that, that's why I suggest Bible study so that he can get a better understanding of Who God is and what he expects from those who claim his son.

Answer 3

Hello,
First, let me ask, did you cause his divorce. If so, forget it and let him go back to his former wife.
If that has cleared the air let me say that it seems you've got yourself a very young child in Christ. He is not well founded and cannot expect to "hear" from God. He, likely, will never be a servant God can depend on. My dear, he has a tremendous amount of growing to do. You cannot be his Mom or his caretaker. He has to go all the way down before he can ever expect to grow up. Your life will be wasted trying to save him. He has to do it on his own effort and study.
I think you should have a friendly parting so each of you can grow. Be kind but firm. You sometimes have to take drastic action just as God did in ridding the children of Abraham of evil,
unresponsive people. He did not try to save them with His chosen people. You must look at this as an action of God's to save you. All concerned will gain by your wisdom. May the Lord richly bless you.

Answer 4

God will not tell people to get married than say that it is not for them after...that is confusion, and confusion is of the enemy...and divorce was authorized by Moses because the people were frustrating him...when Jesus came, he said divorce should be for no other reason other than fornication.....
Look, God will speak to our hearts...but, before we start looking at what WE want, and saying God has layed it on our hearts, we need to look at the Word....the Word holds the answers...sometimes we don't like them, but they are there...good luck and God bless....JC

Answer 5

If you want the closest interpretation of what the Bible actually was supposed to say before the hundreds of translations you are going to have to get used to the "thees and thous". I find though that the King James Version of the Bible has gone through less translations and is fairly easy to understand.

Answer 6

This is a hard question I see his point. The Bible allows only one ground for divorce with the possibility of remarriage, and that is "fornication"—sex relations outside the marriage.—Matthew 19:9.

Answer 7

He is still in love with his first wife and wants that life back. Most people use the devil for their excuse--that's why he grew a tail and horns: HE GOT TIRED OF BEING ACCUSED OF S??T HE NEVER DID! Now God is to blame. YUM! Let's put everything into perspective, pleeeease.

Answer 8

matthew 19: 1-9

Answer 9

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