This is the first time I've asked anyone about this.
I'm married to a wonderful man. He's kind, generous, endlessly obliging and adores me. He thinks I'm gorgeous and is generous with his compliments. In 9 years of marriage, he has never said one single nasty thing to me. Life with him is easy because he puts up with my irritability and is always willing to do things for me. I take good care of him and he tells me that he feels loved and cared for.
The thing is, there is a very big intellectual and educational gap between us and sometimes I am very frustrated as a result. Also, although I can really appreciate him, I never have the butterflies in the tummy thing with him and am not physically attracted to him. We have sex about once every 3 months - mainly because I just can't bring myself to do it more often. Most of this may be mental as I often find intelligence in men to be a turn on.
How do you see this situation? Need wisdom at this point in my life.
2006-12-15 11:17:21 · 5 answers · asked by pinklet123 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Maybe it sounds strange asking if there's a future in this when we've been married 9 years. It's just that I sometimes wonder if I can do this for the rest of my life. At other times, I'm content for a while. No kids involved.
2006-12-15 11:21:21 · update #1
if we base our love on selfish things, like what that person does for us, we are missing the point.if u have a good man, than u are so lucky. if u base the love on lust, when the lust wanes as it always does, all u have is that they repulse u, but had u built your love on bringing out the best in him, and helping him achieve his full potential than that is the type of love we should have for another. this is only from your viewpoint, the way u see it, and what u are telling yourself. passion, sexual gratification, fade, u can give your hubby the knowledge necessary to meet your needs by expressing your gratefulness, and sowing seeds of love. if u have someone who treats u well u are alot better off than many, u may be sorry if u leave him, u may miss him, and not be able to find anyone who treats u that good, we all get in ruts, where we don't feel like we love our mates, but he does put up with your irritability, which some men would not. just be thankful for what u have.
2006-12-15 11:47:14 · answer #1 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Count your blessings. Be happy you have a wonderful man. It sounds like you're the unintelligent one. Why can't you be content with what you have? I know there are a lot of women out there that would love to be in your shoes. This man adores you and you can only BRING yourself to have sex with him once a month. Honey, you better wake up, before he does.
2006-12-15 21:31:13 · answer #2 · answered by mamabear 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Want the best for yourself and for him. He deserves to be with someone who can truly appreciate him and have fun with him, not someone who is silently wishing they had more. you sound really unhappy. you should get out. especially if you dont have kids to worry about. Everyone deserves to keep searching out that butterflies in the tummy thing. Dont settle. You will end up regretful.
2006-12-15 19:23:58 · answer #3 · answered by imnotachickenyoureaturkey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it seems to me like that you don't need to be with him anymore
2006-12-15 19:19:21 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm sorry ....was it you that was the smart one or he?
2006-12-15 19:26:44 · answer #5 · answered by dotcombust007 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋