I've been married for 6 years and separeated for 4 of them. I have two children and my husband says he wants to get back together but I have suspicious that he is cheating on me. I can drive by his house and his car is gone, so if I call him he says he is in bed. So I confront him about it and he changes his story that he is dropping some stuff off to his friends or his went out to play pool. Then if that is what he is really doing why does he have to lie about it in the first place? I just don't know what to do anymore I can't keep pretending everything is fine and not really know. Any advice?
2006-12-15 06:07:40 · 13 answers · asked by sarita 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think that if you have lived without him for four years, don't open your house to a man you cannot trust. The majority of the pain has passed and you would just be opening yourself up to all that turmoil again. The lying is unacceptable and should not be tolerated at all. If you have one thing in a marriage, it should be trust, and you don't have that.
I would file for divorce and get it taken care of once and for all.
2006-12-15 06:32:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you love him? You never mention the word love in your question! That is the most important word there is in your situation. If you really do love him, then you must learn how to trust each other. It sounds like you have always had problems, because you say you have been apart for 4 years. That is a long time to be away from someone if you love each other. Do not get back together with someone just because you have children between you. That is the wrong reason to get back together! It sounds like your husband is missing the children more than you! The children have been used to living with one parent for 4 years now. It could be a problem to put them back into that situation again. You have to think of them and what is best for them, also. Not just for the two of you. These children didn't ask for your problems. You sound like you h ave some pretty big issues to talk about. I suggest you both sit down and find out what you both want out of a relationship. If there is no love or trust between you, then you must go your separate ways. Just make sure that you are both there for your children. They need both parents! Good luck to the both of you!
2006-12-15 14:17:31 · answer #2 · answered by country girl 006 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. You're clearly suspicous of the man. Do you have a reason to be? Do you know that he has cheated before? Once you start being suspicious it'll likely never stop.
I used to have a job where I travelled alot. I never cheated on my girlfriend but she always assumed that I would because of all the travelling. She got to the point that she would call 5 or 6 times a day to 'check in'. The relationship died a quick death.
2006-12-15 14:22:31 · answer #3 · answered by vxpra 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is lieing to you and you can't pretend everything is fine forever. We don't lie when we don't have anything to hide. You might want to just continue with the divorce.
2006-12-15 14:21:37 · answer #4 · answered by mayihelpyou 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't go back. You have proven that he is lying to you. Is this what you want for the rest of your life? Just walk away now while you can. Don't get your heart tied up in it again.
Good Luck
2006-12-15 14:13:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
U SHOUL DEVORICE HIM, THATS THE ONLY WAY HE'LL NOW UR SERIOUS ABOUT ANYTHING, HE NEED TO UNDERSTAND HE'S NOT A CHILD AND U HAVE BEEN SEPORATED FOR A LONE TIME, GO TO COURT AND GET CHILD SUPPORT, THAT IS THE ONLY WAY TO MAKE HIM RELIZE HE AN ADULT AND HAS MORE RESPOSABLITY THEN HE THINKS!
2006-12-15 14:32:36 · answer #6 · answered by CANDY 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A liar is a liar, what more do you need to know? He's an untruthful sneak changing his stories. Do you really want that?
2006-12-15 14:15:41 · answer #7 · answered by INDRAG? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you are not living together then it is fair game to go out, I cant imagine lving apart from my wife, no sex no companionship,
divorce him, sounds like you both already are in your heads,
2006-12-15 14:22:03 · answer #8 · answered by rich2481 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you think he is cheeting if he sayshe is wait acouple of weeks and wait and see if he will stop if he dosen't divorce him.
2006-12-15 14:37:54 · answer #9 · answered by Dania K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've been seperated more than you have been together. Just call it quits.
2006-12-15 14:13:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋