My daughter is only 16yrs old and she has a b/f, however she's not really active when it comes 2 sex, so her boyfriend told her that the only way he can love her or be w/her is if they have sex. I told him that was B/S that's the oldest line in the book.
Please write back and tell her that as well.
2006-12-14 17:28:22 · 16 answers · asked by shortyb5 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I am in my twenties but from my experiences I can say that if he really loved her truly then he would be fine waiting until she was ready. He was just trying to get into her pants, if he loved her than he would have been willing to wait and would never present her with a choice such as this.
-NmD!
2006-12-14 17:31:45 · answer #1 · answered by NoMaD! 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
You are a wonderful mom and from what you write, your daughter too is well on her way to being like you. Your whole family should be proud of you both for your mature approach, and for putting this question to public debate thru YA.
That b/f of your daughter: shun him and all like him. He is just interested in having sex with your daughter and not in her as a person. Maybe he said what he did due to peer pressure but it is good that your daughter has resisted and asked you. She can lose her virginity only once, and that special occasion should be reserved for the man who truly loves her, and that too after she is married. Sex can be a very distracting thing for a young girl, and she should concentrate on what she would like to be in future - sex can wait, but other priorities cannot.
Let her have other b/fs who like her for what she is, and if she too finds them compatible. She has resisted the urge to surrender to sexual advances so far and she should keep it that way. The wait for sex is worth it.
Good luck to you both.
P.S.: Kick out all the guys like the current b/f of your daughter from her life.
2006-12-14 17:49:55 · answer #2 · answered by greenhorn 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
oh my god your mom is so right (and im sure your thinkin thats a first) dont let some guy presure you into sex cuz more than anything hell probably do the deed and then leave you just wait till you find the right guy one thats going to say ok if your not ready ill wait on you till you are and not bother you and say you would if you love me theres more to love than sex believe me ive been where you are and im glad i never did so let the loser go and keep something that you can never get back and that should be shared with someone special and understanding and someone that you love
good luck
2006-12-14 17:32:42 · answer #3 · answered by advise_gal 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well, here's a little message for your daughter:
Love isn't just about sex. Virginity is the best gift you can ever give to your husband, but apparently a lot of teenage girls lose their virginity since high school, but do you really wanna give up your virginity to that jerk? Forget about him. If he loves you, he wouldn't say something like that. He just wants sex. Leave him!! Find someone who can accept you and respect you.
2006-12-14 17:35:58 · answer #4 · answered by Kate 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
ur mums right. hes just a big ole jerk. honey id ditch him and find a real man. someone who doesn't want u just 4 sex. sex is just a minimal part in a relationship. if a man cant respect u enough to wait til ur ready then he needs to be kicked to the curb. u deserve someone so much better then that. ur virginity is a once in a lifetime kinda thing. once u loose it u don't get it back. do u really want to loose it to someone and look back later in life and regret it? take my advice and wait til u find someone that u truly love and want to spend the rest of ur life with.
2006-12-14 19:41:47 · answer #5 · answered by lilmisspriss 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dear daughter, you mother is absolutely correct! If this boy really cares for you, why does he want you to do what your mother disagrees with and you disagrees with?
Tell him to go to the trash can and find what he wants.
What will you get if you give your body to him? He will not respect you; he does not respect you, your mother, or all that is decent! You will not find any responsible authority that will tell you to sleep with this loser!
Do you think any church will support him? Do you think any president, before or now, of the US would support his view?
If you were taking ballet, or studying music, or martial arts, do you think any of those instructors would support him? Do you feel that any of your teachers would support him? Have any of your family members, near and far, old or young, supported his view?
Losers, dumb males that have no clue as to how to be in a relationship with a female have been trying to use that crap line for ages. Don't be a weak dummy and fall for it! Tell him, if he cares about you he will respect you, put your feelings before his and do all that is possible to win the respect of every member of your family and those close to them!
He does not care one damm bit about you! He just wants to be able to brag to his loser buddies, ya man, I got me some of that!
She sure was easy, you know, If You love me, and the slut feel for it. I can get it any time I want! What any easy piece that was.
The next morning, every soul in and out of school knows that you came out of your draws for that loser! Is this what you call LOVE!
2006-12-14 18:07:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
That is the oldest line that guys uses just to get in your panties. If he really respected you and wanted you, he could wait for you. Otherwise, this is a sign that he is not worth it. I'm 18yrs. old and this line has been used on me too, but if he didn't understand I let him go!!! A relationship is based o understanding, trust, sacrifice.......but not just sex!!!!!
2006-12-14 17:34:33 · answer #7 · answered by lil_mama_20062002 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm 16 as well. Any I agree with "mum" on this one!!!
There's no way you can make someone love you by having sex. That's just stupid and ridiulous. Wait till you find someone who really loves you and who you love, and when you are both ready.
2006-12-14 18:19:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just by saying that, he put himself in the pile with the rest of the jerks who have sex with you and then dump you, leaving you to feel disgusting, used, and worthless. Get rid of him to save you some pain.
2006-12-14 17:32:28 · answer #9 · answered by Some Girl from College 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
yeah 16 is too young.. if he loves u, he wouldnt want to make u lose ur most precious asset(ur virginity)..
if u love him, u wouldnt wanna land him in jail..(16 is not a legal age to have sex)
2006-12-14 17:35:27 · answer #10 · answered by a1jacky1990 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋