Straight guys?

Question

I'm a bisexual male..but I seem to be sexually attracted to guys thats straight. I wonder whats wrong with me. I'm totally afraid of myself seriously. I would love to be straight but I ant be..even though christian people tell me that I can change my sexuallity. But how can you change something thats like a feeling inside. I have strong feelings for guys than girls. I just dont believe I can change my sexuallity. My feelings are too powerful for guys. Its like bisexual is glued perminant in my brain deep down hardcore

Answer 1

you cant change your sexuality anymore than you can change your race. dont worry about it, its not a sin or a crime, its just you.

Answer 2

I believe you are confusing 'masculine' with 'straight' or something. Also sometimes it's easier to develop crushes on straight men because they lived in a priveleged world so they might not have as much hang-ups as gay men do. I think that might go away if you find a gay community you really enjoy, or if you simply meet a gay man that's honest about his sexuality. Again, this is easier said than done with all the homophobia still in the world.

Confidence looks good on anyone. Have you heard that before? So if you live in an area where gay men are second-class citizens, then yes I suppose straight men are going to seem 'sexy' although it's not really their own doing.

Answer 3

A lot of things people said make a lot of sense. May I add one more idea to the mix?

It sounds like you feel pretty ambivalent about your own feelings about your orientation. You even say you're afraid of yourself. It sounds like you're in a phase where liking guys is a very scary idea to admit.

So liking straight guys makes things less complicated at the moment. It makes liking guys less scary because there's no danger of your crushes and fantasies turning into a real mutual attraction. It's one way your brain is keeping you from the things you're scared of.

Working on your own feelings about your sexual orientation will do a lot to help you figure out what you really want. And once you figure out what you want I'm sure there's a gay/bi guy out there who fits the description.

I know it's hard, but I hope you come to terms with your own feelings soon.

Answer 4

Why are you attracted to straight guys? You want so, so badly to be 'straight' but ya can't Blanche, ya can't...cuz you're queer, to paraphrase a diva. It feels much safer to say you are bisexual than to say you are gay. At least you recognize you are drawn to men, but I feel you think it's better to be bi (only half abnormal) than gay. You don't want to be attracted to a gay man cuz then you might actually really discover you are gay.

Being drawn to straight men serves a couple different purposes. It makes you feel more butch. Maybe being around straight men will influence you to "turn" straight.

I don't hear you say anything that leads me to believe you might be drawn to a woman.

With regards to changing your sexuality, you can suppress your feelings but you are only fooling yourself and setting yourself up for problems later in life. How many bisexual men have gotten married and had kids before exploding out of the closet. Do you want to cause heartache for a wife, kids, relatives and friends or lead a truthful life with someone who will stand by you the rest of your life?

Many of the respondents above have made excellent points. Please listen up.

Answer 5

You contradict yourself sir. That's the war between the flesh and the spirit when you say "I would love to be straight" then say "I just don't beleive I can change". Just because someone has an urge to do something immoral doesn't mean they should give into it and then say "a voice told me to do it". If you truly want change, you will not limit the power of God to change your desires, your thoughts, your feelings and make you a new creature in Christ Jesus. That is what he died for. A good bit of self-restraint and discipline are your responsibility and to have a sincere heart. God will take care of the rest and all Jesus requires is that you "go and sin no more". He will not leave any person unchanged no matter what the sin is that they battle. If you feed your carnal nature, you will eventually die. The first thing is to truly believe and trust the power of God to change hearts and lives beginning with yours. Read testmonials of those who have changed and kept the victory. It's not just another lifestyle, it will likely cut your life short and rob you of eternal life with Christ.

Answer 6

Don't let people try to pressure you into being what your not. you need to look deep inside, If your Bisexual, Great? That doesn't mean that theres something wrong with you, It just means that your diffrent. Remember you need to love yourself before you can love someone else. As far as you being atracted to straight people. I would really look inside and examine my own motivations for doing that. You may find that your attraction is based on a unhealthy desire to fail in relationships. I really can't say whats going on there, just a hunch though

Answer 7

no matter what all the christian groups say, you nor anyone else are able to change their sexuality. it is no different than trying to change your race. look what happened to michael jackson. seriously though, you can't change who you were born to be. plus if they were really good christians they would not try to change you, they would accept you for who you are. a good christian does not judge you for who you are because a good christian knows only God is allowed to judge.
as far as being attracted to str8 guys, don't worry. alot of bi and gay guys and lesbians are attracted to str8's. i am a gay man and i have been attracted to several str8 men and have fallen in love with a few. i know it is stupid and anyone who does is asking to get their heart broke but your heart is not prejudice. you fall in love with your heart not your eyes or mind. as far as lust well a good looking guy is, a good looking guy. it isn't your fault he's hot.
the main thing to remember here is to not be so hard on yourself. the rest of the world will jump at the chance to do that for you so you need to be good to yourself because nobody else will.

Answer 8

I know the feeling. I am mostly drawn to straight guys - though I know I can't have them. Reason is that straight guys are cuter, and radiate the pure masculine vibes than gays do.

Only God Himself has the power to do a miracle and change your brain to only crave women. I prayed to Jesus all my life to make me normal and give me love for women and desires for them.

The lord rejected my petitions and here I am today, a middle-aged queer living alone within 4 walls.

So I hope God gives you a miracle.

yes isn't it scary being attracted to guys?

Answer 9

well you sound just like everyone else who's gay or bi ...except that most of us don't want straight men. You can't change and you have to accept that to be happy. Sorry but there just ain't no miracle cures...or we all would have tried it at some point. Relax it gets easier and life will become fun again.

Answer 10

Marc,
What do you mean by st8 guys? Guys who like beer and friggin football and chillin with his buds? You like the image of what you think heterosexual men are. But those are things that are pretty much just men. Check out Great Outdoors, Gay Baseball or other "rugged" activities. The guys are butch and available.
Good luck.

Answer 11

You can't change how you feel and who you love. If you love men then you love men.... if you love women then you love women.... If you love both then you have a deep need for love from someone and just haven't found that person yet..... Don't look for love .... let it find you ... whether its a guy or a girl... you will know when it happens