Should I get married dispite my age?

Question

Im 18, engaged and very happy. I have my class B CDL, working in the construction field making really good money(1000 take home a week); to show I can support her. I have the nice car and the things I wanted, use to be a Certified Nurse Assistant(soon to be a radiologist, here in 3 years). I have accomplished so many things for being my age.

I'm not the type of dude to go out and party and get "laid" with all the girls i can get my hands on. I'm laid back. I want a family after 3-4 yrs of marrage. So...the love and commitment is there. I can also be supportive for her materially.

I want to marry the love of my life, travel and want to enjoy my youth with her. Many support us.

In my opinion..people give up to early in their marriage. I know marrage isnt all honky dory at times..but its rewarding. My fiance and I wont ever give up. I know it also...I cant and i wont live without her...is that all that matters????

Answer 1

You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders. I say get married if you want to. Best of luck to you both

Answer 2

PLEASE DO NOT listen to the people that are saying, "You're too young." I'm sure all of these people experienced bad relationships and that's why they think it will happen to you. I'm sure they were immature at the time too. 1/2 of all marriages end in divorce, and the half that are divorced are telling you not to do it. A successful marriage will work if you make it work. A mature 18 year old is smarter than an immature 30 year old. Age has nothing to do with it!!! I say get married.

Also money does not matter because in that case my parents would have divorced years ago! They've been married for 30 years and probably make less than you.

Do you know her family and have you known her for at least a year? Do you both want kids, raise them the same way, etc.? My sister got married at 18, I think her husband was 22. They've been together for like 6 and 1/2 years now. She continued her schoolwork and finished college. She is even doing graduate school now. My point is, marriage will not hinder you or your girlfriends goals, whatever they may be. Love is all that matters. If both of you are on the same page, I'd say go for it.

I'm almost 18, so I know that there are some 18 year olds that are so immature and could never get married for years, but there are others who could. It depends on the person, but you sound like you'll be fine. I would not wait 10 years like some crazy people are telling you! By then you will be old. Why wait if you're ready? If I would wait, it'd be a year TOPS. People are like wait...but you should seize the day (carpe diem!). You don't live but once. Best wishes.

Answer 3

Good for you -- you sound a mature man, and you and she sound perfect together, and that is why indeed you should know each other better so that you do have a loving marriage. Stay fiercely loyal to each other for a few years. If at 21 or 22, then for sure, marry. Marriage, hon, is respect, admiration passion and trust. You sound as if you and she have a good hold on that. Be sure she feels that way about you as well. And remember, the only real dealbuster in marriage is betrayal.... Keep those four words upper most in your mind as you develop into a loving husband and father.... But do indeed wait ....As a wise friend of my always said, "If it is a good idea today, it will be a good idea tomorrow."

What you asked, "Is that all that matters?" That certainly is a big part of marriage, along with being able to solve problems without rage, and to avoid resentment...... That's a big word --- resentment. And it takes all kinds of forms, and tends to build slowly, so be sure you each agree to talk calmly about things each of you will do that each of you find irritating...... agree on a little plan for "Domestic Tranquility"---- little stuff as in who writes the checks, is the toilet seat up or down, or covered, does the bathroom always have to be clean, if one cooks, will the other clean up, will you each do your own laundry or will you split household chores, shopping, and the like. Good luck young man, you sound like a winner!!!

PS. and when you get to travel, get to Africa. If you think the Discovery Channel is great on HD, see the real thing!!!! And before you go to Egypt, get some books from Amazon.com, and learn to read heiroglyphics.... damn!!!! an awesome language!!! and you'll be able to read all the stuff on the temple walls... blow your mind!!
Start your IRA's early -- the $$ you save now is the most powerful of your entire career.

Answer 4

Honestly I would wait because I got married the day after my 18th bday to my one & only, and I got pregnant 5 months later, then 11 months from the day I married we seperated. I learned quickly. After all being a single mother from no help from anyone not event the father that its not easy. I have a new bf and even though we really love each other I would not get married again right now and Im almost 21. If I was you I would at least wait till I was out of school. After all marriage pretty much amounts to a piece of paper in the long run and the girl changes her last name. If nothing else move in together and try it that way for a while. You never really know a person until you have lived with them.

Answer 5

wow, a very convincing argument. I don't know. I got married when I was 18. I am still married seven years later. But I sacraficed a lot to be with my husband. I would be more worried about your girlfriend getting the most out of her life. It seems guys always do, and the girl ends up going along with the man. This, of course, may not be the case for you. There is a lot of time between 18 and 25. more than you would think. you really grow up.
I see that you love her. I see that you will always be there for her. And it is your decision.
I might suggest, only a suggestion, that you stick together but wait a couple years to get married. If you don't see the sense in this now, you might then. but I'm all about a good romance story, so go on...

Answer 6

I have something to say about this.

Im engaged too, and im 20. My parents got married when my mom was 18 and so did his. Both are still happily married.

I think that the reason for this is that when they were that young, they struggled together. They grew together, went through tough times, and it made them strong. A strength that is essential in a marriage.

These days, people want wait until their out of school and accomplished so marriage will be EASIER to start. Then, down the road some of these marriages hit rough spots and they dont know how to deal with them, or theyre not willing to put in the hard work thats required to keep a marriage together.

But i understand why youre asking. Im 2 years older and people that dont really know us try to tell me not to get married so young. Its annoying because its so rude, and I know their wrong, because I used to be one of them!! Im not "blinded" by love and you dont sound like you are either. We are both realistic, we just happen to be young.

True, some young people dont know what theyre doing when they run off and get married and it doesnt last. But this is an awful stereotype to put on all young marriages.

I say GET MARRIED to the love of your life!! Never forget that youll have to work at it, but also never forget all the reasons why you love her in the first place. Years down the road youll have these precious years to share, the years that people are suggesting you throw away to "wait".

Best Wishes, Many Congrats and GOD BLESS!!!

Answer 7

Age is not the issue -you are 18 and your girlfriends I would guess is around the same age too. You are & will still grow emotionally and socially. You both are still trying to find yourself in this world, trying to get your education completed and starting your careers. In both you will come in contact to other people, some of these folks might get your attention. It happens more than we like to admit, you spend most of your day next to co-workers and people become close. You say you trully love her & that you can't & won't live with out her - which has issues in itself, but love does that to us all, so, why not wait untill you both are settled into what it is you want to be & do. Why not go out for a few more years and set a time frame as to when you both take a vow for better or worse. I am not saying this is a guarantee toward forever happiness, just that it give you both time to grow into adults & see things through your own eyes. Marriage is great but it takes a lot of compromise and both people should go into it with a good working knowledge of life. This is best learned by oneself. It will make for a more colorfull venture.

Answer 8

I got married at age 18 and had a lot of problems financially because i wasn't ready for it. It was the times and the financial condition o four area where no one made money. or most did not. we over came all of that because we were right for each other. AS the lady says follow your heart, but I would live together a while longer and find out if the love is still there after you finish school.

Answer 9

Well...u seem kinda ready for things but have u thought things over... marriage isnt jus another romantic escapade.... it takes a lot of work and adjustment...how long have u been togetha..both of u will b havin certain quirks which u may not like about the other person... it may seem small but get bigger day by day...my advice wud b to get engaged and stay togetha under one roof for a year or two and then get married...u hav an eternity in front of u y hurry... keep some spice left in ur life ;) but if u really wanna get it on then go for it....gud luck and my best wishes to both of y'all

Answer 10

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!

Let me tell you something about getting married young: Its like frog soup.

You put that little frog in the pot of water and he's happy as can be. He's swimming and diving and loving it. Even after you turn the fire on, the change is so gradual that the little frog is still having the time of his life. Well, by the time the water's boiling and the frog realizes he's screwed, its too late and he's dinner.

You're that frog my friend, and you won't realize that this is a horrendous mistake until its too late and you're screwed.

If its true love, it will wait until you're old enough to drink the champagne at your own wedding.

Keep in mind that most of the people on here telling you to get married have less life experience than you do. I have more, I have seen 5 engagements break up amongst 3 of my friends all under the age of 23. Its not all about the love, there's practicality involved too.

Answer 11

You need to learn to take care of yourself before you can take care of a wife and family. Although it sounds like you are making a pretty good income things change quite a bit when you have dependents. It also sounds like you are working and studying to be a radiologist which is what you need to be focusing on. Get that out of the way and get some more life experience then get married.