Why do I take things so personally?

Question

I guess it's one thing to get serious and feel hurt when someone is being mean/rude to you in person... but online? I had a disagreement with someone over here and her words seriously hurt. And instead of just ignoring her, I'm letting it get me down and getting depressed about it! What's wrong with me???

Is anybody else like that?

Answer 1

Rose, this really sounds familiar. But why do we assume that something's wrong with us when our feelings get hurt? I'm not responsible for other peoples' behavior and I don't think you are either. We take the responsibility for all the unpleasant things that are said or done to us because then we at least have some control over what happens to us. But we really don't control other folks' meanness or cruelty. Maybe we just need to let go of these things and let them take care of themselves.

Answer 2

I am like that too. Whenever someone says something to me that is mean or rude, I get very upset.

Online is different. I know it seems difficult, but the thing is, people online do not really know you, even if they look at what you write. While it is true you should be careful what you write, and that anywhere online is a "public" place where anyone can come along and read it, the majority of the people online do not really know who you are.

I think it helps if you just decide not to invest anything emotionally in people online. It was not nice to get nasty or mean in an online dispute, but I realize that is what some people do. Maybe they think it is OK because they can not see or hear the person they are being mean to, but they might just be desensitized to mean and rude words. Maybe they think it's a joke or no big deal. That's why you can't put too much stock into what other people are saying online. It's not the real world.
And I know you know this. Just try to get away from being online for a while. Do something else you really like to do.
Hope you are feeling better soon!

Answer 3

It can happen to anybody. Just try to take everything with a grain of salt. Try to prevent yourself from doing anything crazy like cutting or anything else bad. (Not a good way to solve problems for the long term. Might work temporarily.) Just take your thoughts to another place (happy preferrably), and think of ways to make yourself calm once again. People will be human (meaning they can be blunt, rude, evil, etc), but there is nothing you can really do to prevent what comes from other people's mouths. . . .And I admit, I can take things too personally for my own good, but I try not to let it get at me. I usually sit and listen to music or write poetry or do something artistic to get my mind off the world. It takes a while to calm down, but I eventually get over it. Try doing something artistic. Maybe it will work for you too.

Answer 4

I think maybe you are extra sensitive to what people say or think about you or your statements. It's o.k.Lots of others are that way too. Try teaching your self some alternative ways of reacting to people's often hasty remarks.You have the power over how you will react. Maybe if more people were like you the world would be a better place.Be kind.

Answer 5

The fact that you are upset of what are other people say about you, shows that you are a kind, forgiving, person yourself. You would probably apologize to someone if you said something mean like what you are describing. Try to talk with her and work it out, and if she refuses to understand you, understand that you did your best and went out of your way to make things right.
You should be PROUD of yourself.

Answer 6

All i can say is i feel that way to bc someone said if i had a child at 17 i would be a bad mother but they dunno half of it so yeah im right here with you

Answer 7

i would say tat u r a very sentimental person, cuz im not like tat

Answer 8

is what they say true and you don't want to hear it but even so don't let it get to you they don't know you CHEER UP