Men: when you "fall out of love" with your wife?

Question

but you stick it out to try and work things out, what causes you to fall back in love with her?

*she was always a loyal and dedicated wife, you just have your own personal hangups you are dealing with

Answer 1

if u ever loved her than u really can't just fall out of love, u must have fallen in love with someone else. u say she was always loyal, and dedicated, but u must be looking for something else. love is a decision to stay and love her no matter what, it is not a feeling. i would say you are lust with someone else, and your wife just can't compete with the newness of the new relationship. but in a year or less, u will feel the same about this new woman, but will u have a dedicated loving wife, or lust that has diminished, or grown cold? it is a decision to love her, and stay with the person u made the committment to.

Answer 2

I don't believe the falling out of love as much as growing apart. When we marry someone we believe that it is forever. But if that was the case we wouldn't have such a high divorce rate. I think that what we want in our 20's is much different than 30's 40's or 50's. The dance we do to find the right one is all off base. For example if one changes to comply to the other or seem interested in whatever hobby, sports etc. Then after the "I do's" each don't enjoy the common things that they based their ideal relationship on the marriage fails. If you are not honest upfront with a potential mate then you have a weak foundation. Others who go into the marriage and learn to respect each other and continue to grow as couple.

But if each are willing again really honest with each other and try to reconnect then all is not lost sometimes we need to be with each other and spend the time to get back to the real connection. Good luck

Answer 3

"Falling" in and out of love is just a bunch of B.S.. Love the noun is the product of love the verb. Love is something you do, it's not something that you feel here and there. I don't buy that crap. Sorry.

So let's look at it my way... what you're really saying is that when a couple stops putting forth the effort to really love each other -- what then? Isn't that really the question that you're asking?

The only thing to do at this point is to turn toward each other. Look to each other for answers. If you loved each other enough to get married and have already spent some time together, then likely you already know what to do. It's just a matter of doing it.

But without more info from you, I can't be sure what it is that your husband is dealing with. Some guys go a little nutty when they hit 40. You know ... that mid-life crisis thing. For some men, it is very, very real. And if that's what your husband's dealing with -- that's rough stuff. And from what I've seen, there is no easy way through that. That seems to affect men worse than it does women. Not sure why...

If a man wants to re-connect with his wife, it is good to look at old pictures of the wife and to sit and remember good times with her. It is good to sit and talk with her and to appreciate what a neat person she is. He needs to spend time with the wife if he wants to re-connect.

Counseling might be helpful too -- if you can find the right counselor.

I hope the two of you find the answers you are looking for and that you are able to re-connect. Put forth some effort and you'll find what you're looking for.

Good luck.

Answer 4

I have mixed feelings about people who say they fall out of love with some one. I think if you really truly love some one you do not fall out of love with them. Period. It makes me think that they never really loved to begin with, and they had different motives. I would feel like I would never be able to trust that person again because how do you know that they won't fall out of love again/

Answer 5

falling in or out of love is juat am excuese for words.
he or he dont you do or you dont .plain and simple.
no if's or but's.
just get to the point with each other,then you can or you cant.

good luck

Answer 6

In this case, when he faces his hang ups and matures.