that if he was with someone else he would not be that way. I AM COPLETELY HEARTBROKEN. I cannot get everything that he said and did out of my head. I can't functon the way that I use to. I don't even leave the house and I am drinking alot. I am sooooo sad. I cant stop crying I feel sick. Maybe I did make him crazy. He was insane, now I am too.Was it me or will he always be abusive?. He was married once before for 3 years. I dont know how she dealt with him for that long. Maybe he wasnt mean to her. When he would hit me his mom would say that I provoked him!!!!!!!I He did tell me that the Bishop of the church told his ex wife to divorce him. So I dont know what to think. I dont know what to do with myself!!!!IM HURT!!!
2006-12-14 13:53:48 · 7 answers · asked by KISS ME♥*´`*•.¸★ 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Abusers blaim the victim to have more strength. Do you think he would take the balme himself? NO WAY, it wont look good to anyone. Abusers always have an excuse, and they are bad ones and not truth. We all make our oen decisions and he CHOSE to abuse you and not get help. Not your fault dear... stay strong
2006-12-14 16:34:14 · answer #1 · answered by pink9364 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is crazy making behavior!!! It is also severe mental and emotional abuse, ANd NO its not your fault at all. The man has issues that have nothing to do with you. Find your courage and self esteem to get out of this abusive relationship and DONT TAKE IT ANY MORE. Honey ...you deserve much much better then this creep. Hope you become strong and move on. The abuse will only get worse. I know this from experience. If the Bishop of the church told his first wife to get out, then there must be a damn good reason. Red flag city hon. Buck up and GET OUT.
2006-12-14 23:02:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no way it is your fault. Maybe you made him upset but its not your fault he can't control his anger. More than likely he has always been this way and he just gets worse with time. If you have any good girlfriends you should try to get out some. Being inside for a long time when you are sad is never a good thing. I know you are really scared and so confused and you have a right to be. Just know you are not alone and time heals.
2006-12-14 22:47:12 · answer #3 · answered by Lauren 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi there,
By the way you write you soun like you are a very caring, unselfish person who mixed with the wrong guy. Someone who blames somone else for their own actions is a coward and is obviously not in control of themself!
I am so sorry to hear what you have suffered and it is not you at all it is him who is at fault. He has bullied you and manipulated the situation so that you now believe you are at fault when it is just a way to control you.
I hope that you can move on (I know it is very tough as I am going through it myself no) but you sound like a woinderful person & I wish you all of the best of luck.
2006-12-15 07:50:15 · answer #4 · answered by bigbrother 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not your fault that he is abusive. Abuse is a learned behavior, which I just learned at the Rape and Abuse Center. It is not your fault. Since it is a learned behavior, technically it can be un-learned, but it will take a lot of effort on his fault, and you have no control over that.
2006-12-14 22:06:20 · answer #5 · answered by Sonja K 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Trust me, it is not you! He is looking to blame someone for his behavior and he sure isn't going to blame himself! He sounds like a loser and from my own personal experience, men that abuse their wives/girlfriends are the lowest form of human beings. They abuse their "loved ones" and then blame it on them for making them do it! You are the victim, it is in no way your fault that he behaves that way.
2006-12-14 22:04:01 · answer #6 · answered by His Angel 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Abusers never accept responsibility for their actions. You are not at fault. Even if you did make him angry, he has no right to hit you. His mother is an enabler.
2006-12-14 22:13:40 · answer #7 · answered by Jennifer D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋