Am I happy with him?

Question

Me and my fiance have been together for over 4 years. We were HS sweethearts. I fell like we are in a rut. We dont go out very much. He plays video games everynight instead of talking or doing things with me. Our sex life isnt as great lately....I just want to know if I should take the "plunge"

Answer 1

i was in the same situation with my fiance years ago...but because he was a part of my life for so long...i didnt know any other life was out there...i was comfotable! comfortable is not love... anyways we married, because that was the thing to do...everything was already set in motion....9 months later..we divorced...we still cared for each other..but we kinda fell out of love...it became habit instead of love...we had nothing to talk about anymore...nothing exciting happening...we were bored with each other...i knew i felt that way..but had no idea he felt that way...if we would have talked about it before we got married..neither one of us would have a divorce under our belt. its hard to let go of something that makes you comfortable...so maybe you should start slowly...by hanging out with your friends...shopping or whatever you enjoy...and if you enjoy that better than spending time with him...thats your answer....or if you find yourself missing him so much that you cant have a good time...then theres hope you can work it out...but please be honest with yourself. and give yourself time to heal before jumpping right back in. good luck to you

Answer 2

Sit back and think it over hard. Divorce is expensive but also very draining. Do you involve yourself in things that he enjoy's? Do you throw a fit if his friends come over? Or are you one that if he wants it that is the way it is?

Try this: if you do not usually play video games with him, do so. If you know something that turns him on but you usually don't care for try it.

But and this is a very big one..... if he has a fit saying you are always trying to take up his time or he ( just wants to be alone) Get a few friends and start going out. If he expects dinner on the table throw down a $1.06 and give him directions to the nearest McDonalds get ready and go out.

A relationship is a shared resposibility. It is not and I do mean NOT a 50/50 split. No matter how hard you try one person always has more than 50% to do and it could be your burden or his. But if he is not trying to put forth any % then know that if he loves you then he will want you to spend time with him instead of out with the girls every night. If he does really love you he will realize that what you usuallky do for him is worth the small amount you ask from him.

If he doesnt you should know now to save yourself even more pain. Do not let a man hold you in one place if you do not feel that you are loved then it is likely you are missing something important. Wether he can give it to you or not is the question.

Answer 3

NO l would certainly not get married until you sort out all of your issues with your fiance !! Have you spoken to him about your feelings ?? If not, there is every possibility that he is not aware of them. Men sometimes don't see the problems that annoy us women. You should try to go out together atleast once or twice a week just to laugh and talk together. Communication is very important and so is sharing your thoughts and feelings with each other. Only you can decide whether you are happy with him or not. Speak to him and try to sort out your differences and then decide. Best of luck to you and Merry Xmas.

Answer 4

i would say try talking with him. My boyfriend is the same way he plays video games all night and when you try and talk he gets all pissed off. After awhile I started to get really mad and started leaving when he acted like that toward me. I finally sat down with him and told him that i would play video games with him because that is what he likes to do but he needed to do things that i liked to and if he didn't i wouldn't be around much longer. I would suggest doing something like that and if it doesn't work then take the plunge.

Answer 5

hey, well i was in a 3 year relationship and i thought the same thing to myself and you need to wiegh the good and bad and to me it seems like the bad out weighs the good so try to talk to him once more and see how he responses and if cant put you first then imagine when your married you need to do the right thing now and if he shrugs his shoulders or blows it off then ur answer is answered but if anything a great relationship is involving great communication so let him know how you feel its the only way you'll know for sure and beleive me hes not the only guy in this world think to yourself you deserve the best good luck

Answer 6

If you have to ask it means no, or at least not yet. Sounds like you guys need to re connect and fix things before getting married. You dont want to make a mistake, but you dont want to miss out on the love of your life. You need to try to get things more exciting before making a lifetime commitment.

Answer 7

Well let me say people dont change. You get what you got. Is that good enough? If you are under the age of 30- 33 I don't think so...there is so much world and life out there to experience! Good luck

Answer 8

most relationships after so long end up like this so if you are bored you need to spice it up, find different things for the two of you to do together. What you are describing is no reason not to marry someone if you love the person b/c eventually most relationships get into routines.

Answer 9

Don't take the plunge- flush the relationship away and find someone who prefers you over video games.

Answer 10

No don't do it.You would be happier with me.I don't play video games.I love going out and sex is the next best thing to breathing