I have been in a relationship with the father for almost 3 years now. We didn't plan the pregnancy it was a surprise for both of us. Now all of a sudden I want nothing to do with him. Is this because of my hormones? Has this happened to anyone else?
2006-12-14 11:57:58 · 19 answers · asked by Glee4today 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
omg, i went through the same thing with my kids' dad when i was preggie with our first child. when we conceived we lived in different towns about an hour apart. after i was a couple of months along i started resenting him and wanted nothing to do with him. all i can say is work through it. remember why you're with him in the first place and that you do love him. after our daughter was born, i fell in love with him more deeply than ever. just something about seeing him holding her... i don't know. i hope it gets better for you. we are now pregnant with number three and i think this one is going the best as far as our relationship goes. we fought like cats and dogs for the other two, but his one, it's like we have one brain most of the time.
2006-12-14 12:06:51 · answer #1 · answered by Mommyof4 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Think about how you felt about him before you were pregnant. Did you love him? Or were you just staying with him because it was convenient? I'm not trying to be insulting, but a lot of people are complacent in relationships and don't leave the ones they should - I've been there. If you know you loved him, then I doubt you have stopped loving him for no reason.
I also wouldn't blame this completely on hormones. The pregnancy was unplanned. It must be a great stress to both of you, and a strain on your relationship. You should really sit and think about why you want nothing to do with him. Talk it out with a close friend. Figure out why you feel this way. Is there something he is doing that is turning you away? Are you overstressing, and is it driving a wedge between you? Be open to the idea that you may be overreacting about little things because of the hormones.
Recognize faults in yourself as well as faults in him, and then the two of you need to talk it out.
2006-12-14 12:03:06 · answer #2 · answered by Charade 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have three primary hormones and a number of others that occur in lesser amounts.
Because hormones effect your emotions, and thus your perspective and outlook, during pregnancy you experience an even wider range than before when you simply had 28 different days to worry about. Now you have nine months of days of different combinations of hormones to deal with.
Your "feelings" toward Mr. Wonderful are the result of the accumulation of these hundreds of days in which you viewed everything he did and said from a different persepctive and outlook each and every day. It's a million little things that were all put into a file in your mind, that you aren't even conscious of.
Because you refer to him as "the father" and not "my husband", it's evident you're not married to him. You gave him the sex he wanted, but did you ever get the love you crave in return? My bet is you never did. You made the tragic mistake of giving him sex in the hope that it would result in a flow of love toward you.
Because you flipped over too easy, he never genuinely cherished you enough to do what was right by you. Does he have your good at the center of his every thought? You've robbed him of that just like he robbed you of the abililty to give him the honor and respect that he craves.
Now you've made a baby who won't have a loving father, and will grow up in a house where mom can't show dad the respect he craves. The shortcut you took put you way off course.
I can't go further without knowing more about you, so I won't.
You've made bad choices. Start making good ones.
2006-12-14 12:23:23 · answer #3 · answered by s2scrm 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's your hormones. I went through the same thing. I wasn't sure I wanted to be with my boyfriend (baby's father) for like the first couple of months. In fact I didn't tell him about the baby until I was 17 weeks. I feel so bad about it now but at the time I wasn't sure I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him or how he would feel about the baby. I am now 34 weeks and couldn't be more sure about things in my life. I'm very happy with my boyfriend and we are excitedly waiting for January and the birth of our son.
2006-12-14 14:49:05 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say if you were happy with him before the pregnancy then yes, its hormonal.
In my first trimester i hated my fiance at times - absolutely hated him. There were days where he could do no right at all - it would annoy me when he breathed near me (i kid you not!). It was just awful, i was awful towards him and i just couldn't help it. Everything was his fault - all the morning sickness, food aversions, cravings etc etc. Poor guy literally couldn't do a thing to please me - i was completely unreasonable and neurotic. BUT it did wear off - we put it down to the hormonal changes my body was going through. It did hurt him in the beginning but then he just passed it off as a "pregnancy symptom" and learnt not to take it personally. And eventually my hormones levelled out a bit and i stopped being such a b*tch all the time.
You're body is going through alot of changes... its like 20yrs of PMS exploding all at once! lol. But it'll pass!!
Good luck :)
2006-12-14 12:51:53 · answer #5 · answered by Smiley One 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It might be hormo. probs Or you dont truly love him. Yes its happened before. You hate him for knocking you up and you have to face the fact that you are going to have this man's baby.But you have to face the fact that you have this living life in you no matter how you feel about the father now.Please after this child is born use protection to prevent another child. First all think about this child no matter how you feel towards the father. Put his **** on the back burner for now but you need his help as in cash. He made this child also. You have to turn your life around if you dont love this man.You have lots of time to think of this situation.Has he ever said he would marry you? Have faith and hopefully this feeling will pass. Good luck to you and please have a healthy baby.
2006-12-14 12:09:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do believe it is due to hormones. I was this exact same way when I was pregnant. i didn't even want to see him, whereas before I had a fit to see him all day everyday. You do need to sit him down and talk to him though, so he don't get all freaked out and leave you or something bad like that. Good luck with everything. it will get better.
2006-12-14 11:59:44 · answer #7 · answered by Mommy To Be in April 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The same thing happened to me. I couldn't stand anything about until I was about 5 months pregnant. I think it is a hormone thing, but that is just my opinion.
2006-12-14 12:10:05 · answer #8 · answered by beccaboo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hormones are pretty crazy this early in pregnancy. feelings of doubt and worring is completely natural. a lot of women have dreams about being with other men or the babies not being the real father's child.
if your having this extreme feelings i'd say talk to your doctor, or a shink about it. it never hurts to ask questions. what's most important is that you do what is best for you and your baby!
2006-12-14 12:03:59 · answer #9 · answered by butterfly_in_a_jar 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Partial blame of your reluctance is your increase of hormonal imbalance. It could be the stress of the unplanned birth. You should talk this through with him and assure that both sides are feeling secure prior to making any judgment whatsoever.
2006-12-14 12:07:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋