I've been with my partner for 5 years. I am 40, she is 30. She is still living with her parents, mainly due to them waiting on her hand and foot. She has refused to settle down with me, however earlier this year she went off to Africa for 2 months to do voluntary relief work, on the promise that once she got back and 'got it out of her system', we would settle down. She's been back 3 months now and it's gone back to how it was before ie she's back with her parents and refuses to get involved in any discussions I try and initiate ie buying a house together etc. The relationship, I feel, is going nowhere. Or am I being unreasonable? Is it time to just throw in the towel?
2006-12-14 08:18:31 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
hmmmm.....I would say so....5 years is a long time to wait for someone to want to take the next step in commitment....she obviously is not a very mature 30 year old....find someone that wants the same things you do...that will love you and want to be with you.....you sound like a really patient and kind man....you deserve better...good luck
2006-12-14 08:54:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
At 30, she needs to take control of her life. If she truly wanted to be with you, she would have accepted settling down and taken the leap. She wants to be waited on, which her parents do for her, so she's not going to give that up. She tried and apparently it wasn't worth it to her. You have given her 5 years and she can't give you 3 months? It sucks because you obviously love her and she may love you dearly, but she has to be willing to take the leap and she just doesn't seem ready. It's funny when I think about me at 30 compared to her - married (separated now), 2 kids, full time job, full time family, full time school. Life has it's way of working out, it will for you. If you can say here that your relationship is going no where, then it is going no where, and it is time for you to find someone to help you get the relationship you want in life.
2006-12-14 09:26:36 · answer #2 · answered by Baby Me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's time to throw in the towel. Five years is exhibiting the patience of a saint.
She is perfectly comfortable acting like a spoiled princess and being waited on hand and foot. This behavior is never going to change because she sees no reason to change. And the truth is she'll probably be able to find some guy who's perfectly content with having a girlfriend and not a wife in his home.
But if you are not, it's time to cut your losses and move on.
2006-12-14 08:32:20 · answer #3 · answered by Karen L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK 5 years is too long not to want to settle down..DUMP HER! Apparently she is a mommy and daddy's girl!!! She is 30 and still lives at home..that should have given you a clue 5 years ago when she was 25 and still lived at home. It would be different if she was going to college and trying to save. But she is lazy and only wants things her way. Time to move on!
2006-12-14 08:22:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think its time to throw in the towel. Shes afraid that she wont get from you what she gets from her parents. This would mean extra work for her and becoming a wife, and why would she do that when her parents baby her every need. Its time to move on and find a strong woman who knows how to live on her own two feet.
2006-12-14 08:38:05 · answer #5 · answered by Leyanis 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude... Get a clue, your relationship is going nowhere. Your girl sounds like she was spoiled little brat as a child and still is a spoiled little brat at 30. She also sounds like she isn't interested in settling down as long mommy and daddy is around to wait on her hand and foot. If you really want to settle down you should drop her and find someone who is right for you.
2006-12-14 08:27:45 · answer #6 · answered by girl_of_your_dreams_1331 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is time to throw in the towel, this woman loves the companionship she has with her parents, more than you. So I don't believe that your relationship will prosper far beyond what it is now. After five years she should be making some type of decisions, so I personally say it's time to let go. You deserve more.
2006-12-14 08:23:12 · answer #7 · answered by Cheree E 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that it is time to throw in the towel. If the relationship is going no where. Then evidentallly yall don't have much in common. And the way it sound it seems to me. The relationship has been over and been going down hill.
2006-12-14 08:22:30 · answer #8 · answered by Shizzy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Throw in the towel she sounds like a spoiled little baby; Jeremy, get a hold of yourself as she has no intention of making any commitment to you or anyone else (I want my mommy and daddy). If you want her to grow up you'll let her go. She needs the school of hard knocks so give it to her and go on with your life do not let it affect you and start dating someone who cares about you.
2006-12-14 08:38:06 · answer #9 · answered by beamer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it would be time to throw in the towel, it just that she doesn't know how good she has it with you and see think you don't have the guts to do what you say. so I say go for it maybe you'll find someone else that is willing.
2006-12-14 08:23:19 · answer #10 · answered by ^/\^Lilly^/\^ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋