Ok , its the typical soap opera. Got pregnant and dumped for my best friend! He doesnt want anything to do with me or my kids(I'm having twins). What should I do? Should I try to get him involved ? How? I already asked him to come with me to get my first ultrasound and he refused. He honestly doesn't care! I don't know what to do anymore. I need his support. I need someone to be with me when I break the news to my parents(I'm 16). I'm going nuts! What do I do?
2006-12-14 06:23:12 · 25 answers · asked by DeAd On ThE iNsIdE 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Get a real friend to be there with you when you tell your parents (not the traitor who took your bf).
As for baby daddy, it's up to you. You will automatically get custody just because you have the kids. If you want to make custody "official", file a petition right after they're born. You can't make him be involved, but you can make him pay child support, but that takes a court order.
Decide what you want. Do you want him allowed in their lives? If so put his name on their birth certificates, take him to court. He'll be ordered to pay child support, you will be granted custody (unless he fights for it but I don't think he will) and he will be granted visitation. Whether he takes it or not is up to him.
If you don't want him around, don't put his name on the birth certificates, and don't take him for child support. It's all or nothing in this case.
2006-12-14 06:32:30 · answer #1 · answered by tabithap 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok first this why you shouldn't have had sex in the first place. Aside from that if he doesn't want to be with you then there is nothing you can do really aside from maybe try to take him to court and get child support but I doubt that a judge is going to order child support to a 16 year old girl. Just get a job and forget about him.
2006-12-14 08:55:04 · answer #2 · answered by baddrose268 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He tousled - large time. This guy feels like a guy dealing with some type of midlife disaster who would not understand what he needs. this is unlucky that you're having a touch one at the same time. yet when he's so speedy to leave you and pass on how did you already know he would not do this to his newborn to? perchance he will have yet another infant consisting of his new fiancee or spouse and be sure he would not opt to go for your son anymore? What little boy ought to ever ought to pass by using that? i'd under no circumstances examine with that guy back and finally end up a guy. you already know, the type that would not walk out with the first ingredient with ****. Your son desires an excellent male function kind, no longer a immature boy to interrupt his heart.
2016-10-18 07:17:35 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not custody - child support (that should freak him out). You're 16 - how old is he? If he's of the age of majority meaning that he's an adult (in some states that's 18 year others it's 21), you might inform him that he legally raped you in which case you might just want to call the police and let them deal with it. An adult having sex with a minor and getting her pregnant? Oh, that's a winner, for sure!
2006-12-14 06:29:32 · answer #4 · answered by Noel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, you are only 16 and are pregnant with twins. The first step would be to tell your parents. If you are lucky they will try to help you. First they''ll advice you on the b/f situation and then figure out how to help you manage the pregnancy. Good luck!
2006-12-14 08:27:16 · answer #5 · answered by thatgirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, if you know he is the father then get a test and then take him to court for child support and have him sign over his rights if he is the parent. Second of all, ask you close friend to be there with you when you tell your parents. It maybe hard for your parent to cope with it,but you need your friends and parents to help you when you raise these children. Third of all, go for consuling for you because it is going to be a hard road to deal with and maybe you need to have your parents there so they could understand where you are coming from. Most of all, accept that maybe you made an mistake by getting pregnant because honestly that is one of the night mares that a parent has for their child at a young age. Give your parents the option to go with you for your dr's visits and if they feel it is to much, then ask your close friend to go with you instead. Its hard when parents find out because they feel its their fault for not raising you better but think of the possiblities of your parents growing close to you and being there for you! Your ex on the other hand, is a child himself for not taking the responsilbility of being a parent but also understand of how scared he is besides how scared you are because you are pregnant! He will grow up to become an adult and see how hard it is for you to be carrying these beautiful babies. He may down the road want to be in the children's life so give him that option. For now, just worry about your health and the health of these babies. But also think about how your parents feel when they find out. It is never easy to tell parents that you are pregnant. If they lash out of you because of anger, dont take it to heart. They will feel disappointed of what happened but be there as your biggest supporters. Tell your parents that you love them and wish to discuss something like this in great detail. It may hurt them and it may hurt you. Dont worry about your ex because what goes around comes around!!
2006-12-15 18:03:14 · answer #6 · answered by blue_packy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would just sit down with your parents sooner than later and tell them..maybe they can talk to your ex for you..and just as a reminder her left u for your "best friend"'..she wasnt your bf or she wouldnt do that!!!
I would start taking legal action as soon as you go for your first aultrasound...or at the very begining of your 2nd trimester.
You will love these babbies unconditionally im sure of it, so they dont need a daddy they have a momy... You can try to get him involved but he is running from his responsabilities because he is too immature,let the court inforce help on him...
i understand your prolyl terrified because your not only haveing one baby but 2 at the age of 16 it can be a scarey thing... but hold your head of high and i think you can do it... just keep tinking your guna give these kids the best life you possibly can and daddy is guna miss out on everything(the first smile,the coos and caws, biting thier toes, first words, etc)....
also dont stress about it, just tell your mom and dad and if you need advice on how to tell them add me to your yahoo msger or email me and i will help
daydreamin_ashley@yahoo.ca
best wishes hope to hear form u soon..add me if u just wana talk!!!!
2006-12-14 07:21:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he'll wish that he would've stuck by you for the sake of his kids because i know that inside he will be resenting the fact that he left you and his children, you don't need to take legal action, for what? he probably will win anyway. Just tell your parents that you're pregnant because they might be able to help you in this situation better than anybody else.
2006-12-14 07:06:44 · answer #8 · answered by mimi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get over him...you can't make a sperm donor a father. You need to tell your parents and seek legal help. Go after him for custody and child support payments when the babies are born.
2006-12-14 06:32:34 · answer #9 · answered by mommy_2_liam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how is it you know you are having twins and your parents don't even know you are even pregnant???
you can move for the child support now. at least get the paperwork started. Go to the Child Support Services in your area and they will do it for free. you can't make him care. it's not important to him and never will be.
2006-12-14 06:29:00 · answer #10 · answered by Bella 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋