I am 5'9 and thin and as I said I was talent scouted by a model agency when I was 17 and I modelled for three years before going to college. That was all several years ago. My boyfriend has recently told me that I'm "short", that I "will always have a weight problem" and that "no matter how hard you try you will never be attractive."
Why is he saying these things? He is actually the exact same height as me himself and he is neither thin nor especially goodlooking. But I dont' tell him that, I try to bolster up his confidence by paying him a lot of compliments. Why does he say such mean, weird things to me?
When he said that I'll never be attractive, he was really staring at me and then he ran his fingers underneath my eyes to see if I was crying.
2006-12-14 05:12:41 · 49 answers · asked by Very Nice Indeed! 1 in Beauty & Style ➔ Other - Beauty & Style
What he is trying to do is make you feel bad about yourself, because he does. He does not love you, or like you or even like himself for that matter. Which is why he is putting you down. You need to let him go. Don't try to fix the relationship because he is trying to manipulate you. Love does not hurt, and he is hurting you. Why he was trying to see if you were crying is because he wanted to see if he affected you. I say break up with that loser. If you were a model apparently you are beautiful and he is jealous, he doesn't want to another guy to want you so if he tells you that and can make you believe it then men will pick up on it and won't want you. It completely psychological. When he tells you that you don't build him up break him down, shut him down then cut him off. And when he tries to come back crying laugh in his f_cking face and tell him that he missed.
2006-12-14 05:25:12 · answer #1 · answered by Love United 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
#1 Anyone who disrespects you and treats you that way is someone you should dump. Yes, that is my blatant answer, now read this and learn well. Here's my tips for a prosperous relationship:
Everytime I hear the saying "opposites attract" I cringe because that couldn't be any farther from the truth. For people to be in a relationship with you, both of you should be totally insync with each other on most levels, sure we're not all the same, but the person you love should be your best friend. Yes you heard me say it, BEST FRIEND, as in someone you can trust completely, talk to about ANYTHING and everything, RELY upon, and share common interests. Someone who will always be there for you and accept you no matter what circumstances occur, good, bad, or indifferent. You should also know everything about that person's life, and understand their personality, flaws, good traits, ect. Remember, communication, communication, communication! Know your partner!
All of this takes a lot of TIME to create, a lot of talking and getting to know the person before leaping on them, making out, having sex, ect. This is why most people FAIL at relationships, because they are total strangers trying to make up for a lifetime of not knowing the person they are with, therefore there is no base for trust. Hence, friendship 1st is absolutely crucial.
I speak from personal experience because I am in a loving relationship that is all of those things and more.
2006-12-14 05:19:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well for starters get rid of your boyfriend - even if you were ugly no boyfriend worth a penny should say that ever. Secondly - just for clarification - just because someone is a model it does not mean that they are gorgeous - if you watch runway models they often are not stunners but they have a think figure and their face does not take away from the clothes, and that is a perfect model in many cases.
2006-12-14 05:16:37 · answer #3 · answered by radiancia 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriends comments are obsurd and mean spirited. But forget him; I'm concerned why you would keep a boyfriend who is so disagreeable. You are beautiful no matter what size you are, if you model or not. You are a worthy human being and you should take the opinion that you are way too good for this spiteful guy. For Christmas, you should give yourself the gift of saying "bye-bye" to this guy. Seek out friends, both girls & boys who enjoy your company.
2006-12-14 05:17:29 · answer #4 · answered by Charles & Elizabeth C 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are still young and learning and you have chosen poorly on a boy friend. And you can correct this! Get rid of him.
And you will do better the next time because you have learned something and are stronger for it.
No boyfriend, except an asshole would tell his girlfriend she is ugly. Why would he be with someone he thought was ugly? He is a controlling creep. You are not ugly. and you need to start seeing yourself as worth something.
Is this the kind of guy you want raising your children?
If your daughter came to you and said the same thing about her boyfriend wouldn't you tell her to dump the jerk?
2006-12-14 05:14:49 · answer #5 · answered by ♥ ♥ C.J. ♥ ♥ 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
GIRL, DUMP HIM NOW!!!!!! YES ,YOU ARE TOO THIN, BUT UGLY ,NO!! Most models I have seen like you are almost skin and bones, and that is not attractive.
But he should not be talking to you that way, no matter what he thinks!! For one thing he does not like the way he looks, and he feels bad about himself. That over the years made him turn in to what looks like an abusive person .Do not try to change him, that most of the time ,will not work. LIVE HIM, NOW!!!!!DO NOT LET HIM CONTROL YOU ! YOUR ,YOUR OWN PERSON.
2006-12-14 05:34:02 · answer #6 · answered by ? 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's being cruel to undermine your self-confidence. He doesn't want you to think of yourself as attractive, since he's scared if you feel good about yourself you may leave him or flirt with other men. Dump this creep immediately before he gets his hooks into you!!! This is crucial. He will NEVER treat you better, only worse. Run! There is nothing on earth this relationship has to offer to you except heartache, self-loathing, low self-esteem and eventually, abuse.
2006-12-14 05:21:40 · answer #7 · answered by wynterwood 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's abusing you, and you are letting him. When he says that sort of thing you should reply back that it doesn't say much for his taste in women if you're so damn ugly why'd he want you? Low self-esteem? Couldn't do better? I would verbally rib him a new one, so I suppose thats why no one says things like that to me. Give it a try. Oh yeah
DUMP HIM!!!!! He wants to make you cry, and you are going to put up with that?
2006-12-14 05:22:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont think that you should be going out with this guy he is giving you a low self estemn which a girl does not need I think that if you really love him talk to him if you follow your heart break up with him if you cant get to him through talking to him I think a boyfreind should not be talking to you like that Hope everything works
2006-12-14 05:19:43 · answer #9 · answered by Dreamy Girl 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't worry about what he says, I would just worry about finding a new boyfriend! Even if you were the most unattractive woman in the world (which I am SURE is not the case) then if he truly cared about you, he wouldn't say such things. Verbal abuse is still abuse. Get out now!
2006-12-14 05:16:03 · answer #10 · answered by frenchy 3 · 4⤊ 1⤋