A friend of mine suffered a tubal pregnancy around this time last year. Therefore resulting in her having to have one of her fallopian tubes removed. I have done some research on this, I am aware that the chances of ttc are almost cut in half every month for her. But she keeps telling me how bad she wants a baby (BTW she has been married for two and a half years) and has called me up balling sometimes. I have told her about the research I have found, and about certain medications she could go on to help assist her. But here is the problem, she is a drinker, now she doesn't get drunk so she is not an alcoholic but she does enjoy having a few beers here and there and also enjoys hitting up the bars on the weekends. She is also a smoker, I have tried very politely to tell her that she needs to cut alcohol out of her lifestyle at least for a little way and stop smoking. But when I tell her this she gets offended and accuses me of saying she is a bad person.
2006-12-14 04:57:01 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
How else can I help her out, she is a really good friend of mine and although her husband is aware of their struggles she confides in me about the emotional feelings. I feel bad for her but she will not listen to my advice how else can I get it through her head that she has to make some lifestyle changes and speak with a doctor because it took her a while to get pregnant with the one that she lost and now she is going on two years with only one failed pregnancy. ANY ADVICE OR SUGGESTIONS ARE WELCOMED
**SERIOUS MATURE ANSWERS ONLY**
2006-12-14 04:58:47 · update #1
You may want to look online for solid statistics that show the correlation between smoking/drinking and decreased fertility. Also remind her that if she DID get pregnant now, she'd have to give up drinking anyway. Help her see that smoking could be extremely harmful if she did get pregnant and would certainly be detrimental once the child was born. Confront her openly and honestly. Bring statistics to back up your thoughts. Reinforce that you are NOT judging her lifestyle, but that you want to help with her problems. Also encourage her to start an exercise problem or take up a new hobby-those would reduce her stress levels and increase her chances of getting pregnant.
2006-12-14 05:03:41 · answer #1 · answered by Joyful Spirit 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
good luck with that one; it's tough when your friends are in pain and theres really nothing you can do. you've done your best with your suggestions and i guess the rest is up to her. the best thing you can do at this point is just be the shoulder and listen to her; and keep suggesting what you are suggesting; she may be thinking she'll quit all that when she becomes pregnant... well that seems logical right? ? ? well even with a pregnancy stopping smoking is still incredibly difficult and then there's the chance she won't be successful and still be smoking during pregnancy and we all know the dangers and risks that it can pose... so my answer.. good luck; and it sounds like you are being a true friend.
2006-12-14 05:07:57 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok it does sound slutty but some people do this for a reason. Ask her why she gives guys what they wantand tell her its not going to get her a proper relationship where the guy will treat he rationally and seriously. And eing 14 doesnt help... If talking to her doesnt work, try telling her parents or something. Does she know she could get pregnant or an sti?? You should send her an anonymous pregnancy test to get the point through :Pjokes Tell her to get her act together or start charging for it
2016-03-13 06:53:38 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi
i am a doc so i hope this may help
1)r u sure she has no addiction problems cause if she has,it will affect the child during nad after prehnancy ( with all respect to feelings of both of u)
2) assuming all is fair and fine,her husband sounding rasonable and smart,and if she can afford it, tell herto go far artificial insemination
i am surprised your research didnt yield tha so long
but now u know
thats the only good way around it
OR
test tube babies is a second option
2006-12-14 05:15:58 · answer #4 · answered by poison_ivy_sam 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'll research the net to see if drinking too much and smoking lowers your chances of getting pregnant - then if it does maybe you could present this to her. If she wants a baby that badly I'm sure she'll consider quitting...
Good luck with your friend - you're a good one to her.
2006-12-14 05:22:19 · answer #5 · answered by Mum2Boys 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I used to be the same way. sometimes you need help with quiting smoking and drinking. Tell her that if she really wants to have a baby, then she will need to quite the crap. Especially becasue of the loss of one tube. Her chances are cut in half already. They get cut in half again when you poison yourself. I have been quite smoking for 8 months, and it is tough, but I am pregnant now, and thank god for it. But you have to learn to sacrafice things to get other things. tell her your not trying to be rude, or pushy, but want the best for her chances of having a baby.
2006-12-14 05:05:47 · answer #6 · answered by sr22racing 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋