Should we stay together?

Question

my husband of 10 years is withdrawing from me. he wont talk things out he just acts like everything is fine. he said as couple grow older together that they arent as close as they use to be! im so sad, he use to try so hard to make things better but now its like he dont care!

Answer 1

the question is are you happy having that kind of situation! what matters is what you value is it your happiness or being a martyr...

On the other hand if talking to him doesnt make any difference maybe it is not working you take a break and give him space.

Answer 2

I've been married 20 years and my wife and I are closer in many ways now than we have ever been. So, I disagree with your husband. What he is saying is not how it has to be. Yes, you should stay together. Maybe he's tired of "talking things out" if it's come to feel like nagging or arguing. Stop expecting to talk things out, and instead, when you have a problem with something he does or says, just state shortly and simply exactly what it was, how it made you feel, and how to prevent hurting your feelings again. Then, drop it and go on to a more pleasant topic. The more you focus on good things, the closer you will become again.

Answer 3

You know...so many people go through this. i read question after question. So you two have some distance between you. Go to marriage consueling. Marriage, if you understand the true meaning and purpose of it, is not something to walk away from because you don't talk anymore. If that's your mentality, you never should have gotten married. There is a reason for the saying..."For better or worst". You got married now do waht's right and get the help you need.

Answer 4

it's a sad situation, it's one of the reasons that make me hestitate to get marry!
u are not the only oen to suffer from this problem, some of my cousins are telling me the same,
i just want to know if you have children, because children will helps you to keep your relationship, it can make you closer, because you will have one more hing that you share together..
the weird, is that having children can be also one of the reaons of the situation u are living, in case you give more time to children that to ur husband, and you don't care abt ur look and abt romance as much as u did before having kids,
as a solution, i can say, change a bit ur look, to the better of course, go out together to some places you used to visit when u were engaged, restaurants, clubs....
talk about future projects, invent ones if u don't have!
if u have enough money, travel together, it's always a good solution, and the result is amaizing, u will feel better for sure
talk to him, in a romantic place, choose a day, go to a restaurant for a dinner, don't be nervous while talking to him, don't get furious, keep quite, and talk abt it, say that ur relationship is more important than anything else, and that you love him, and you want him back , as he was before, caring, tender.....
good luck!

Answer 5

I am not suggesting that you leave but...My parents have been together for 38 years. They are still the same, happy as ever. So that excuse about this is normal is a lie. Maybe u should keep trying to talk to him about it. If he decides not to answer after a while, then give him an ultimatum, tell him to talk or walk.

Answer 6

No, if he won't try then it's over. Most couple get closer as the grow older because they know more about each other. What they like and dis-like, what turns them on and off. Sounds like he is getting lazy as he gets older. Let him know that you can't take it and if he doesn't care about your feelings then it's time for you to go.

Answer 7

Maybe he's comfortable in the marriage which is why he doesn't try so hard now? Have you tried to spice things up? Act spontaneous?

Answer 8

are you happy in the situation?