me and my wife have got a wonderful relationship.....we love each other dearly. Her sisters family live about a hundred miles away. My wife is a completely different person in their company or if we talk about them. Its like he has waved a magic spell over her. She treats the kids as her own and the kids, bro in law and her act like a family when they meet. I get left alone to deal with my son from previous marriage. Her Sister in law does not talk to me.What shall i do? Why is this happening?
2006-12-14 00:58:57 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
wow do i ever know what you mean! my husband has a huge family and when i joined the scene me and my daughter from previous relationship were treated like outcasts too!! we love eachother too but his family was indifferent toward us. his sister wouldn't talk to me either and his parents? yeah they really didn't like me. i felt bitter and angry too and didn't know what to do. his family was like an exclusive club and i wasn't invited! but then i talked to friends about it and got some good advice. 1. when around the family don't let yourself be ignored! stay friendly and calm, go to the sister in law and start the ball rolling. talk to her. even if it's a simple thing like offering to help set the table for dinner. show them that you want to help and that your interested in them. 2. compliments!! they work great to break the ice and let people open up to you. don't overdo it but notice things like " hey thats a nice sweater" or your looking nice today! even if you don't mean it it will still show the person you noticed. women especially like to be complimented so take advantage. 3. don't sit alone, find someone you want to talk to and open a conversation. i know it's hard, almost 6 years later and i still have a hard time with this but it's working! ask questions, find out what they are interested in and go for it. families are a hard thing to deal with and no one wants to feel left out but the more you try the better things will get! i am friends with his sister now and his parents have really warmed to me. we get together whenever we can now even though my husbands in the navy and not here. so trust me you can do it!! GOOD LUCK!!
2006-12-14 01:22:13 · answer #1 · answered by onyx maiden 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What you are expreiencing is a bond. It is normal for them and you may feel left out but that is a choice totally. All you have to do is be assertive and join in on things. I'd like to commend you on even attending the events (that shows perserverance!). Read Personality Plus by Florence Littauer and that book should explain why you are feeling the way you are. Good luck!
2006-12-14 01:03:34 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing wrong with this...
She has a close family who was brought up in giving lots of love to each other.
Maybe you should join in and try it. You might be surprise...
I don't believe that you are left alone...
You choose to be alone by not joining them...
You tell your wife that you want to be part of her family and she will bring you in.
2006-12-14 01:09:56 · answer #3 · answered by Aussies-Online 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First discuss this with your wife if you truly love each other you should also trust and be able to speak freely.
OR go to a marriage counsellor to find the reasons, with your wife.
2006-12-14 01:11:02 · answer #4 · answered by *maris 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
obviously she wants her own kids, no offense to your son for previous marriage but some women want something of their own. maybe she wants to have her own family(but if she does, don't forget ur child from previous marriage).
2006-12-14 01:08:47 · answer #5 · answered by teecetwin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need 2 talk 2 her about this
2006-12-14 01:01:28 · answer #6 · answered by mummy to 3 miracles 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just go with the flow, no harm is been done they may just be a close family, i wouldnt worry, i have a good relationship with my brother inlaw, hes like my big brother thats families for you
2006-12-14 01:03:23 · answer #7 · answered by eyoremum2004 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think there is something wrong why don,t you just tell her how you feel and ask her just what is going on and if you did anything
2006-12-14 01:38:41 · answer #8 · answered by shiva 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow its hard to answer to that wen we are not there but it sounds like shes making you pay for some behaviour that you have towards here that you and her haven't talked about or.
2006-12-14 01:17:05 · answer #9 · answered by kiara A 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
try talking to ur sis-in -law and sort this out...before it gets too late......probably you can have a kid with ur present wife
2006-12-14 01:03:03 · answer #10 · answered by quick_one_23 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋