the effect of divorce on the children and their parents?

Question

the psychological and emotional effects on them

Answer 1

Regardless of the situation, children often worry about what is going on in their lives, and they often see divorce as something very traumatic. One of the most important things to a child in a divorce situation is their own security. They are not concerned for their parents’ happiness. The younger the child is the more of a one-way street they are traveling.

Children sometime make comments like these:

What if they both leave me?

What is it that I did wrong?

It must have been me who caused the divorce!!

Now what's going to happen to me?

Many children react in different ways with the onset of divorce. Some will be extremely sad and may show signs of depression, and even sleeplessness. Children's anxiety levels go up as they feel they are going to be abandoned or rejected by one or even both parents. Some divorce situations may make the child feel loneliness. This can be due to a long absence of one of the parents.

No matter what the case, the child will be affected in some way by a divorce. This change will probably affect them for the rest of their lives. Some children may become psychologically scarred from the experience, and still other children may not be affected emotionally at all. Much of it does depend on how the parents handle the situation. It is better for the child to grow up in an environment that is conflict free. If children are exposed to a family environment that is in constant conflict, the child/children will most likely be more psychologically scarred than if they grew up in a conflict free divorce environment.

Uncontrollable Bad Effects - With divorce come some bad effects that cannot be controlled. Many times money, or lack of it, becomes a problem. Child support or financial assistance can make things very difficult for one or both parents. In some instances one of the parents may have to relocate. This brings with it a new set of problems. Not only do the parents have to work things out, but the children have to adjust to a new school, friends, and environment.

These are just a couple of the unfortunate circumstances that come with a divorce. There is really nothing that anyone can do to change the situation, so the children and parents must stick it out and adjust to the changing environment. The only good thing about the changing environment is that children can often times adapt very well to change. But the children still need the love and support from their parents in order to get through the situation.

The Loss of Family - Family structure is very important and families are very special. Your kin are the people that you age with, and create a very special bond that is completely intimate. These are the people that know you the best. Then divorce happens.

Divorce in the family environment means that the family must restructure itself. Both parents must continue to play an important role in the life of their child. It is generally a good idea that the parents design a well thought out parenting plan in order to keep some predictability in the family structure. This is good for the child's sake. Divorce does not have to mean the end of a family.

It is also good for the children to keep close ties with other relatives they can connect with. Even if you as the parent do not get along with the extended family, you must keep in mind that extended family is good for the children. The children need these people in their lives.

Birthdays-Holidays - For parents and their children holidays/ birthdays can be one of the most difficult things to deal with. Remember that the first birthday, the first Christmas, the first anything spent without a former spouse is the most difficult one to get over. As the years pass, things will get easier for you and your children. The reason for this is that now the children are accustomed to the new routines that they have been a part of. As each year passes, the family will feel more comfortable with the way the family spends these times of celebration.

It is also important to remember that you do not completely lose your former spouse with divorce. They must also be there for the child. With a divorce you may lose your ex-spouse, but you never lose being a parent. You and your ex will always be your children's parents, and it is wrong for any parent to deny the other parent the pleasures of spending holidays and birthdays with their children. >r

Answer 2

DIVORCE IS ALWAYS HARD AND PAINFUL FOR EVERYONE. BUT OFTEN IT'S ALSO THE ONLY WAY. EVERYONE HAS THE RIGHT TO BE HAPPY AND IF YOU ARE MISERABLE IN THE MARRIAGE, AND CAN'T DO ANYTHING MORE TO SAVE IT, THEN YOU BETTER END IT. A LOT OF PEOPLE MAKE THE MISTAKE OF STAYING TOGETHER "FOR THE CHILDREN". BELIEVE ME, THAT'S THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO! THE CHILDREN KNOW AND FEEL MORE THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE. I LIVED IN SUCH A FAMILY FOR YEARS. MY PARENTS DIDN'T DIVORCE AND THAT WAS EVEN WORSE FOR ME AND MY BROTHER. TO WATCH MY MOTHER CRY ALL HE TIME, MY FATHER COMING HOME LATE(HE WAS HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH THE SAME WOMAN FOR 16 YEARS), TO HEAR THEM FIGHTING OVER EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME. TO SEE HOW MY MOM IS WATCHING TV IN THE KITCHEN, MY DAD IN THE LIVING ROOM- BUT THEY BOTH WATCHING THE SAME TV SHOW. IT'S MUCH MORE PAINFUL. EVERYBODY HAS THE RIGHT TO BE HAPPY AND SEEK HAPPINESS. THE KIDS MUST BE ASSURED BY THE PARENTS THAT NO MATTER THAT THEY ARE DIVORCING, THEY LOVE THEM VERY MUCH AND WILL ALWAYS BE THEIR PARENTS. TIME HEELS ALL WOUNDS. EVERYONE WILL FEEL BETTER AND MORE RELAXED AFTER IT'S OVER.

Answer 3

in my experience,
the children most likely become drug addicts,
suicidal,
don't reach their potential in life, become loathesome,
lazy, hate their parents.