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I've asked this before, but I need to ask it again..... I am soon to be 30, he is soon to be 46. Our personalities fit hand in glove, and three hours in a coffee shop talking about everything and everything...went by like it was just under an hour, and we wished we had just one more hour... BUT, he has seven children. And a bad marriage in his past. Granted, I have that too, but only one child.

Does the age difference matter? Will he be able to have more children, if he wanted to? Or is it as with women, that men become infertile at some point in life?

2006-12-13 17:30:20 · 19 answers · asked by ms_moonlight1977 2 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

19 answers

That's all good..........it's not the age difference.
It's the seven kids....step kids are the biggest
destroyer of marriages in this country.
There isn't any more stress than that.
He can have more kids, and for some time to come.
But how much time does he have to spend with them??
They all need their fair share regardless of age.
It takes a fat bank load to send them to college.
Think about this really well.......It's your future!!

2006-12-13 17:39:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

I think there could be many more issues than the age difference. Do you really want to take on a guy with 7 children and a bad marriage in his past? If he loved her enough to have 7 children, doesn't this show you a major flaw in his character? A simple coffee shop conversation is easy to manage for him, but what about all the layers of experience and baggage he is not sharing. Seven children will be much more of an issue than you could possibly imagine. You and your child both will always be compromising. If you were ever to become his wife, you would eventually have to start asking for the needs of yourself and your child to be met. You will have to get in line because of all the others already in his life making demands as well. Are you willing to sacrifice your peace of mind just over a guarded conversation with this person. Believe me, there is someone else out there that could make you a lot happier just by not having so many children to deal with. Do you want to take the risk of someday being referred to as just another person making demands on his life. Then comes his next rendezvous with another lady to escape responsibilities again! Think about it.

2006-12-13 17:42:49 · answer #2 · answered by PZ 3 · 0 0

Age seems a minor issue compared to many other questions I would have. How long have you known each other? What do you know about each other? Is he paying support for his 7 children? What kind of relationship does he have with them? What does he do for a living? Have you ever been to his home? How long have you both been divorced? What made his marriage bad? And yours as well? The hand & glove personalities would be interesting to experience. Seems there is very much you both need to know about each other. And perhaps you've both learned much in those 3 hours. But new encounters are usually enjoyable......AND consumable. Yes, he is probably capable of producing seed indefinitely....unless he's had a vasectomy.......

2006-12-13 18:11:54 · answer #3 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0 0

Men can have kids into their 80's. The only thing I'd be worried about is that if he's 46 and you're 30, will he want a 20 year old when he's 56? Tends to happen if they are into young and pretty, sometimes. Otherwise, you are both old enough now that age doesn't matter.

2006-12-13 17:39:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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2016-11-26 02:16:48 · answer #5 · answered by delosreyes 4 · 0 0

Now it might nit matter, But when he turns 50 and you are still in your 30's it might. I have a gap of 12 years he is older almost 13 with my hubby. Married 16 years. I would not recommend it. I am still in my 30's and he is in his 50's. Views change. Wants change. I am full of life. Want to do things. He has slowed down. Relationship is very netural. He is thinking about retirement. And I still have many more years to plan for that.

8 kids wow. I have one. Couldn't imagine. Remeber the older you get the more health problems you get. Yep you could still make babies but would you have him to help you care for the child or will you end up caring for 10 children.

Think about it. Ask why he is interested in you. You are young. Older men go through mid life crisis.

Nothing is more strange than having people say to me and my son its nice your grampa can come to your school events. And happens more often that you could imagine.

2006-12-13 19:29:21 · answer #6 · answered by desertlady 3 · 0 0

Wow, seven kids is a lot but beautiful I wish I had that many. But I think some men remain fertile for a longer time than women. I prefer older men I am 27 and the oldest guy I dated was 62, he is such a sweet heart, but follow your gut insticts. Think about all the child support he has to pay.

2006-12-13 17:46:43 · answer #7 · answered by NJ Lady 1 · 0 0

Age really does not matter. In your case, the man already has seven children. Are you willing to take care of all that including one of your own. Can you really be able to handle the pressure in the coming years. Think properly and wisely before making any kind of decision. Once again, your age difference is not an issue here.

Good Luck

2006-12-13 17:41:25 · answer #8 · answered by sonisunny 3 · 0 0

He has seven kids and an ex wife, that's a lot of baggage. Would he want MORE kids? You've got 8 between you! Would you want more kids? You'd be getting 7 step-kids! He could certainly have more kids - but I would suggest he get a vasectomy - he's contributed enough to the population.

2006-12-13 17:36:56 · answer #9 · answered by coffeytalk.com 2 · 1 0

dudes can get it on and pro-create in their 70s and 80s. ever heard of Tony Randall? he head a kid with some 40 year younger woman when he was like 70.
16 years difference doesnt matter now. when he was say 25 and you were 9 it would be weird, but you are both adults now so go fer it.

2006-12-13 17:37:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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