Im 21, with two kids. I got married at 20. I love my husband and i dont want to lose him, but i have a problem with nagging all the time, and its ruining our relationship. but i dont realize when i do it. How can you stop doing something when you dont realize your even doing it. Im confused, i dont know how to stop. What should I do?
2006-12-13 16:26:54 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you find yourself nagging, drop to your knees and give head
you will learn to change your behavior, and he will enjoy it
2006-12-13 16:35:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anarchy99 7 · 2⤊ 3⤋
Man what a crappy bunch of answers except for the one that advised you to learn your own behaviours by noting what you do when feeling a certain way. That's good advice, and beneficial to you, not him. There is a lot of truth in the fact that you are not responsible for your husbands happiness, that's his problem. You might find, however, that the happier YOU are, the happier your husband is likely to be, because lets face it, it's hard to be miserable around someone who is disgustingly happy all the time! Laughter is both infectious and the best medicine. :)
2006-12-14 00:46:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most important thing is to observe yourself. Keep a log. I wrote to someone earlier that while we cannot control how we feel, we can control how we act -- but first we have to be aware of how we are feeling (what we are feeling) and how we act when we are feeling what way. That means first you have to observe yourself. Without judgement. Dont judge yourself, just observe. How are you feeling? Are you sad? Are you hungry? Are you angry? Are you tired? Are you happy?
Then observe how you act when you are all these things. In becoming self aware, you can slowly change how you are acting. Only then (when you are aware of how you are feeling) can you really address what might be making you feel what way, and what the two of you can do about it.
Keep communication open... if you can communicate between you, then you can work through anything. This is how to start.
2006-12-14 00:33:27 · answer #3 · answered by Clear thinker 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I bet you are nagging because you are over worked, tired and feel unappreciated. May I suggest you get selfish and find something that you want to do just for you. An exercise class, an art class, sewing lessons. Something that you are interested in, something that makes you feel good doing. This will help greatly in relieving the stress you are feeling and taking out on your husband by nagging.
2006-12-14 00:32:22 · answer #4 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Recognize that you are probably a co-dependent and need to get into some therapy. It is a very common issue these days and not impossible to fix but you must get the help you need and do some work to find out why you are angry. It may be issues with a disfuntional family that you were raised in...try reading Compelled to Control. Great book!
2006-12-14 01:02:27 · answer #5 · answered by emourelatos 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Okey I'll b honest w/ you
-to be apperciated
-be nice, honest, faithful
-dont take evrything for granted
-dont think all I want sex
-dont ask for money all the time
-cook some food
-dont nag/*****
-talk with sweetness that I can lick :)
-dont be rude
-dont make row out in public
-share opinions
-make love not just sex
-make me want you
-make me happy, proud
-love me for who am I
-be happy with my both good and bad
-dont compair between genders
-be staright up
-no games or drama
-dont abuse
Hope that might help....for you...lol :)
If I left anything just add it...haha
2006-12-14 00:38:51 · answer #6 · answered by DON 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
i bet you feel like you are married with 3 kids. it shouldn't be up to U to keep HIM happy. He is a grown man who should know how to keep himself happy as well as enjoy your companionship. Allowing him some alone time and having some alone time for yourself would also benefit, not only yourselves but the children who witness everything that happens. Just because you are married doesn't mean you should be joined at the hip.
2006-12-14 00:37:09 · answer #7 · answered by desert_rose1274 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Next time you feel liek nagging give him a BJ instead. This is a healthy outlet.
2006-12-14 13:54:23 · answer #8 · answered by onlineseeker 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Make a conscious effort to stop. Enlist the help of your husband to tell you, gently of course, that you are doing it. And stop when he tells you that you are. You'll learn to be more aware of your nagging. And he'll be pleased at your efforts to stop.
2006-12-14 00:33:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
tell your man you don't like nagging and you need his help to stop it...ask him to think of something you might not like doing but he loves, you sound uptight so maybe its oral sex, and tell him that everytime you nag he is allowed a bj...this should stop your problem...you just need to change your behavior...good luck.
2006-12-14 00:33:52 · answer #10 · answered by never2pink 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Think before you say anything, try to say things only once or twice and then move on. Also there maybe your stressed or unhappy, talk to your husband about these things and maybe he can help. If you are stressed, let him know and ask him to help relieve the stress.
2006-12-14 00:34:32 · answer #11 · answered by Rosie 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋