A Canadian tourist found himself at the end of his vacation in the Frankfurt airport, tired from walking past the many sights and sleeping in strange beds, but sustained by his many new memories and the idea of arriving in his familiar home. He stopped and bought a lunch special at the airport deli. He wasn't really hungry, but it was certainly better than the prospect of airplane food and gave him something to do as he watched the planes take off and land and waited for the one that would be his. When the announcement came over the intercom, he quickly sucked down the last of his soda, tossed an uneaten apple into his handbag, and hurried off to the gate.
When he was on the airplane, just before landing, the steward handed him a customs declaration, which contained many questions, He looked over the form, and saw that much of it didn't apply to him. He quickly checked his answers on the fold-out table. No weapons. No drugs. No animals. No. No. No.
2006-12-13 14:47:05 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Education & Reference ➔ Primary & Secondary Education
After landing at the Montreal airport, the man was furiously pulled out of line for a random baggage search. The customs agent was the epitome of a Canadian bureaucrat; his pudgy fat rolling overtop his government issued polyester pants. During the check the agent found the forgotten apple in his bag. The agent squinted through coke-bottle glasses, sniffling snot in the way only someone who had mired over regulations all of his life could.
“Sir, what is this?” the agent asked.
“An apple, I guess,” the Canadian replied. The traveler envisioned the agent's air quotes in his mind.
“You have declared on your card no fruit!”
”I'm sorry, I must have forgotten I placed it there.”
“You forgot?” he said with a mocking voice, “$ 400.00 then!”
“$ 400.00. For what?”
“$ 400.00 as a fine for a wrong declaration,” He said it with the matter-of-fact tone, as if she was telling nothing more important than "stand in that line over there."
2006-12-13 14:47:25 · update #1
“Sir, I told you before that I had forgotten it”
“Sorry, these are the rules.”
Then the tourist wanted to sympathize: “Sir, we’ll make a deal, I’ll throw the apple in the garbage and next time I’ll be more attentive”
“Sorry, you have to pay”
Then the tourist smiled. He ate the apple and asked the agent, “How would you prove to me that I ever had an apple?”
The agent turned a bright red, and understood that he made a vast deal over a problem that might end by a simple warning. Especially since the man had admitted and apologized multiple times that he had forgotten about the apple. Finally, to avoid looking stupid, the agent with a yellow smile let him go.
2006-12-13 14:47:52 · update #2
In my 700+ years, I have read both good and not-so-good material!
Your's (IMHO) has promise! I would very much like to read your finished product! It has interest and a special spark which could result in a very nice story!
Bare in mind that your (future) publisher has folk who will attend to the details. You only need provide the basic storyline! They will "fix" what needs to be fixed (or point out the problem areas to you).
IMHO, You have something here that is worth continuing!
As a fellow writer,
The Ol' Sasquatch Ü
Best wishes!
2006-12-13 15:09:10 · answer #1 · answered by Ol' Sasquatch 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The airport in Frankfurt is an unlikely place for your customs agent to exist. I've been to this airport. As is typical of the folks living in that country, they're very efficient there, and are unlikely to shake you down at the gate, or behave so unprofessionally.
However, if you were leaving a Central or South American airport, you might experience this kind of shakedown. I could see your customs agent as a slob working in Buenas Aires before I'd see him anywhere near Germany.
2006-12-13 23:09:34 · answer #2 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
$ 400.00 as a fine for a wrong declaration,” He said it with the matter-of-fact tone, as if SHE was telling nothing more important than "stand in that line over there."
SHE should be HE. In the beginning of the story there are a lot of 'ands'. Break your sentences up a little where you can.
Otherwise, it looks ok I think!
2006-12-13 22:52:01 · answer #3 · answered by PenguinsWife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Great story, but I was just wondering when the man eats the apple, it's as if he eats it all in one gulp. Otherwise as soon as he took one bite, the customs agent could have apprehended him or told him to stop at once. It takes time to eat an apple. But really, you do have a good command of the "king's" English.
2006-12-13 23:04:02 · answer #4 · answered by soulguy85 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I liked the end. I thought it was funny. You should put a type of food on the list beside weapons, drugs, and animals. Just so the readers see that HE ( not SHE) did in fact check it off. Good luck!
2006-12-13 23:03:29 · answer #5 · answered by lostinmissouri 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually, I like it. I don't think there is anything missing as you do. It is cute, there is a lesson/moral/story, and good characters.
2006-12-13 22:58:25 · answer #6 · answered by commonsense 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You got lucky and did not have some illegal drugs and going into Dubai.
2006-12-13 22:59:48 · answer #7 · answered by Jo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
too lazy to read it all good luck
2006-12-13 22:48:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋