Nearly every month my wife uses money we need for bills to feed what has grown to be a 2000 dollars a month spending habit. When I try to put a limit on her spending she attacks me and says I'm controlling. She will not go to cousiling, when I told her I thought she had a shopping addiction she said "how dare you" and didnt speak to me for days.
I recently came up with the idea of letting her spend like crazy one month BUT this time I will not come in and save the day by paying our bills with my savings. If she spends the light money on a purse, than the light bill just does not get paid, if she spends the water money no water, grocery money no groceries ect. So at the end of the month shes had her spending binge but has no water, food or electricity to show for it..... Maybe at this point she'll come around and hopefully get some help, do you think this will work?
2006-12-13 13:51:38 · 21 answers · asked by BossHogg R 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
the only thing that will work is for you to control the flow of the money...if your wife needs to spend her money and its hurting the family, then you have to make her understand she hurting everyone, just as if she were a drug addict....hard example but true...explain u will control the money flow untill your caught up then set monies so she can spend...otherwise it will get ugly fast
take a stand
2006-12-13 13:56:26 · answer #1 · answered by sweetness666 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it might work, but you are going to have to suffer too.You should both have a say over the money. Try writing down all the bills and household bills such as food, gas, etc. , add them up and then see how much money is left over after the bills are paid and family needs met. Split the money that's left between the 2 of you to spend as you like. It's the only fair way to do it. Good Luck!
2006-12-13 13:56:54 · answer #2 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Money is a matter, so did your wife working.
If I take it as Yes, Than you only take care the basic need of you and cut all the unneccesary spending. for example take out the share card, or stop all the money that go to your wife.
I been saw a hong kong superstar have a wife spending until broke and the wife leaf him and go get blue flim job. So what do you think about your financial . If like Bill Gates than is ok if not better control and have small fight rather than you broke and wife go away..small fight if better than no fight and ...small fight can get the thing right before is too late to recover.
take care.
.Money vs basic need.
What is our basic need? Food and safety home to stay..think...
2006-12-13 14:08:50 · answer #3 · answered by melvinsyc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your wife, I am the man and what I say goes, I'm sorry if you don't like it but this spending stuff is coming to a stop right now. Tell her if she spends anymore money that you are going to completely cut her off and you are going to be in charge of the bills and the groceries. Still go to couseling it will definately help.
2006-12-13 15:07:54 · answer #4 · answered by Maizy * 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Her attitude sounds just terrible. I think if you do those things the only result you are going to have is her getting more angry. You have confronted her already and she refuses to face the reality of her spending habit. Getting everything shut off isn't good for you, not sure how that will effect your credit, but I think if it has gotten to that point, you should consider a divorce. You married a grown woman not a child, that you need to take things away from to discipline. She is supposed to be your partner, if she can't be more responsible, leave.
2006-12-13 14:05:58 · answer #5 · answered by Lovebug123 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a million) you gotta start up trusting people. You`ll in all possibility be harm by employing some, even with the undeniable fact that it may be few to the real people accessible. 2) preserve your dad and mom 3) porn is vast! 4) college =/= happiness 5) like somebody stated "push-ups". Any actual dedication improves the soul 6) in fact, any dedication to some thing will strengthen the soul for it transcends you. And top now chum, you're caught in an adverse photograph of "you" 7) money is over valued 8) artwork on the 1st 7 and you gained`t sense so "broken" and "unfix-able" 9) merely you have any possibility of achieving this
2016-12-30 09:20:48 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is some truth to the statement "what's mine is mine and what's yours is mine"? On the other hand, you are on the right track. I do not know how the bills work at your house, but at ours, we pay what bill we can out of our individual salaries. Only use your salary to pay some of the bills, don't dig into your savings. Make sure that she knows that remaining bills will have to come out of her salary. This may help.
2006-12-13 13:58:11 · answer #7 · answered by lynette g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the shock of not being able to cover the bills may wake her up a little, but there's also the chance she'll wallow in self pity and lash out at you for not covering her.
It may take more than once, why not split the bills evenly, cover anything that has your name on it to and let her figure it out from there.
2006-12-13 13:57:04 · answer #8 · answered by gypse76 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't allow her to handle the money, sometimes we have to set boundaries, how convienant for the one doing the wrong, to call the one trying to do right the controller. that is not really the way to go, got to set boundaries, if she isn't willing, may be time to think of separating. give her an allowance, but don't give her control of the bill money.
2006-12-13 14:01:20 · answer #9 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is only going to curtail her spending when she sees the lights getting turned off because of her blowing money left and right.
2006-12-13 14:33:10 · answer #10 · answered by silentevil92684 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋