Does anyone else think that , that grounding a 20 year old still at home is a bit extreme?

Question

I am a 20 year old living at home and was recently grounded for a week, for "lying" to a collection agency about when I was going to recieve my next pay check, I was just wondering if anyone else thought that , this was a little extreme, I have taken care of all my finanical issues without parental help and I am very upset about this choice and do not know what to do.

Answer 1

Yes, I do.

I notice a lot of correspondents using the claim "its their house, it's their rules". But I'm not sure how strong that philoophy is.

For a start, what are the boundaries? Is their rent-paying enough to enforce that you go about naked, for example? A somewhat extreme example, but you can see that we have to clearly define the boundaries here. Could they force you into doing somehting that makes you feel uncomfortable?

And why does owning the house give them the right to do that? It's true enough, I think, that we should beable to identify with the objects of our labour. By this, I would include the right to live comfortably if one pays rent. Your parents have the right to enjoy that which they have eraned- the luxuries of that house. But grounding you isn't really one of those earned luxuries. It doesn't correspond to their labours.

Plus, I think that one can't exchange one's labor for the loss of someone else's freedom either . I.e. in a civilised society, I cannot legally buy the right to physically attack someone else. I can't use my labour to give me the right to reduce someone else's freedom. Although it gets a great deal more complex than that when we look at it closer- all forms of capital obtain their use-value from the privation of someone else's freedom. But that's a different matter.

There's also the matter of choice. If circumstances have forced you into living with your parents, then it's unfair for them to treat you like a child: you didn't choose to live there. If circumstances, rather than personal choice, have forced you into that situation, then both you and your parents may be performing equal amounts of labour, but with different economic rewards. Nevertheless, in such a situation: if you are all working, you therefore all have an equal right to power within that household.

These are just a few thoughts of mine. No doubt there are many flaws in them.

Answer 2

I'm a bit younger than you but I'm in college and I know about all these finances and stuff...I wouldn't have grounded my child but if you were living under my roof I would still have some type of control over you. I guess since your older and they have no other way of controlling you or teaching you a lesson..they decided to ground you. In my case..yes a bit over the top but I think they just are trying to make a point. Hopefully you avoid things like this in the future if you really dont like it...if not then I say find your own place and never owrry about "grounding" again.

Answer 3

If a collection agency is calling you obviously can't afford to move out.

UNLESS YOU ARE IN SCHOOL - You are old enough to be supporting yourself. IF YOU ARE NOT IN SCHOOL there is no reason for you to be in Debt Collector situation while living at home. You do not (typically) have any living expenses when living with your parents.

IF YOU ARE NOT IN SCHOOL and the debt collectors are calling you and you don't have rent etc. You need to be grounded.

Get your stuff together. You have the rest of your life to screw up your credit. Take your punishment and use the time to figure yourself out a budget.

Or move out and make your financial situation worse. You'll figure out your budget then.

Answer 4

Well if there is one think I hate, its lying.But I do think this was a bit extreme, at this point in your life you should be able to sit down and talk about the problem at hand. Lying is something that you shouldn't do, and at your age you should not be in debt enough to have collection agency's call. So Work on getting that dept down, and no more lying. Merry Christmas.

Answer 5

Well I must say, if you are paying your bills and you have a collection agency after you, and you are receiving a paycheck, then you are financialy able to get out of the house. I dont know if you are responsible enough, but if they are doing that, you should probably sit them down and tell them that you dont appreciate it, and that you're grown. If they dont get it, then leave. Because it is obviously too many adults living in that house.............

Answer 6

Yes this is probably a little extreme, but you're an adult and you should talk to your parents about this, you're certainly not a child and just because you live under their roof doesn't mean they can control every aspect of your life, and if things don't work out then maybe you should move out if you're financially stable.

Answer 7

Um.... how CAN you get grounded as a 20 year old?? As soon as I turned 18, I did what I wanted when I wanted, and it someone didn't like it, I Left!!! Grow up and have your own life!! GET OUT OF MOMMY AND DADDY'S HOUSE! When I was 20 I was on my own in Sicily, 4000 miles from home!

Answer 8

if you still are living at home and not paying rent, or contributing to household upkeep and you did something wrong that deserved to be punished just like a child then the grounding is okay but my question is whats a 20 yr old male doing at home if you got a job and pay your bill and everything elses doing at home not paying rent and not contributing for household upkeeping, im just wondering!!

Answer 9

Well it hardly seems worth trying to have a conversation with someone so immature. You better grow up quick young man... or you'll have a lot more to worry about than being grounded. personally I'd kick you out... so consider the grounding getting off easy.

Answer 10

YES!! i am 20 and also live with my mom and she won't ground me. I think that at 20 you are too old to be grounded, it's kind of insane.Im sorry i hope you are not grounded for a long time..