okay i have been married for 3 yrs with 3 children...i have caught him in a lie. I asked him about a females number in his phone and he lied about it.well as time went on I found out he lied. I talked to the girl. I confronted him again not telling him what she told me and he refused to answer me, he just got really stupied with me. should I just let it go, pack up my stuff, or get even ( I can admit there is this guy i would love to try.
2006-12-13 13:22:07 · 18 answers · asked by strgblkwmn 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Revenge is not the answer..revenge belongs to God, 2 wrongs do not make a right...tell him you want the truth....how would he like it if you lied to him.....may God give you wisdom....in Jesus mighty name...amen
2006-12-13 13:27:53 · answer #1 · answered by Bert 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What is your GUT telling you. If you feel it in your gut then there's a reason. Investigate Get your proof,check the cell phone bill online if you can,all you have to do if the company has a online service is to make up a user name and password,you can print them off if you have cingular. If you don't have a computer at home,get someone to watch the kids for a hour or so and go to the library and get someone to help you get online and to the site,you don't have to tell them what for,but if you do tell them you want to learn to be able to check your records online. Then when you have all the proof,bust him. You can't believe another woman if she is after you husband,she is going to tell you anything to get you to leave.
2006-12-13 15:27:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
seems your husband is cheating, why get revenge, it will only make u look bad, and hurt u more than it does him. can't change things with your marriage, as he won't even admit it, just a coward and a liar. get a divorce before u decide to begin a new relationship, why stoop to his level. he has betrayed your trust, your marriage will never be the same, why not get a restraining order, make him leave, file for divorce and child support, and move on with your life. don't believe him, and don't get even, revenge is not all that it is cracked up to be, u would be comprimising your belief's and would be down on his level. get rid of the cheater, and move on, revenge will have him see u happy and confident, on the arms of another happy, and secure, that will be your revenge.
2006-12-13 14:14:07 · answer #3 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Id confront him about it and if he still lies to me, then tell him what you know and Peace right out of his life. I wouldnt stoop down to his level by getting even. Show him you are sooo much better than him and that he doesnt deserve you. If he cant be open and honest now even if he didnt have sex with her, what makes you think that he will in the future? Think about it.
2006-12-13 13:36:07 · answer #4 · answered by Leyanis 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For a strong black woman you aren't showing it here. If he cheated on you the odds are he will continue to do so but it is not a guarantee that he will. Many have cheated, been caught at it, and gone on to remain faithful. Cheating on him won't solve your problems, but make you as sorry a person as he is.
You have 3 kids to think about. Make your decision based on what is best for them.
2006-12-13 13:29:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi,
I'm a 17 yr old girl. I'd say u should leave cause if he loved u he would not have done that to u in the first place, and getting even is saying that u r just as low as he is. So do the wright thing and LEAVE PLEASE!!!!
2006-12-13 13:28:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you try this other guy, and let your husband find out. You take the chance that he does something crazy to you, or the kids, or this innocent guy your hot for. If you want to leave then you have all the leverage as far as divorce court goes. Take him to the bank if you decide to leave. Then go try that guy, and send him pics after the divorce is finalized.
2006-12-13 13:27:38 · answer #7 · answered by Brian F 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hi, well you didn't say whether or not your husband had been unfaithful. so, assuming he was I have to tell you that 2 wrongs don't make a right..it makes two wrongs. The fact that you already have another man on your mind doesn't sound like you're very faithful either. You have 3 children with this man. First and foremost you and your husband owe it to your children to at least try and make this wrong right. I can tell you from experience. My husband of 12 years was always running off and cheating on me.....a one night stand thing......and he would condone it by saying he left me so it wasn't really cheating >>>STUPID A**....and like a fool i kept allowing him to come back....until one day he left and i found out he was screwing around with some b*tc*...to make a long story short....I DID GO OUT THAT VERY NIGHT AND GOT EVEN WITH THE DRUMMER OF A BAND AT THE BAR I WENT TO. sadly.....i felt awful about being with someone other than my husband. i felt like a whore. i continued to see the drummer for a month or so. when hubby found out wifey wasn't runnin' around lookin' for him and begging and pleading with him to come home because she found a big drummer boy....he came cryin' and beggin me to let him come home. i let him sweat it for awhile and ended up letting him come home. He was pretty good after that....but we ended up divorcing....i left with an awesome lookin, tough guy, that knew how to treat a lady....he opend the car door for me and crap men should do. anyway.....it's hard to say. i don't know the whole story. we never had kids to worry about though. you can't stay with him if you can't trust him. that alone will kill you....the stress of always wondering where he's at and who he's with. it ain't worth it. You need to do what's best for you and your children. those babies should be your first priority. then find yourself someone you can trust. as far as i'm concerned...if he cheated once and lied ....he's gonna do it again. so, i guess after thinkin' about it.....KICK HIS A** OUT THE DOOR. if he loves you and wants to come home...make him work for it. make him proove to you that he can be trusted. he blew it. if you go out with this other guy , then hubby will have that to throw up in your face everytime you turn around. so, hang tight, be the angel, and get rid of him if ya have to...then go seek another male.....one you can trust....they are few and far between. it's a mess and i feel so bad for you. i know how bad it hurts. getting even made me feel worse....but it may not make you feel bad. ?????? i don't know sweetie.......all i can say is....GOOD LUCK and i pray everything will work out for the best for you and your family. GBU I hope in some way i have helped.....it's confusing....soooooo many mixed emotions. love always ends up hurting you in some way or another. we either loose to another female or we loose them to death....love hurts....but it's wonderful while we have it.
2006-12-13 14:02:41 · answer #8 · answered by anndee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't support divorce a good seperation might be good but also consider the time you are doing this ....... Christmas. Seperation I say because it will help him realize the big mistake he is making on cheating on you or whatever and he'll need you. ... also leave him some responsibilties.
2006-12-13 13:27:04 · answer #9 · answered by Christina D 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't get even, it just makes you feel guilty and it does nothing to help. Try counseling, or at least try to talk it out. If he doesn't want to stop what he's doing, then yes, leave him, he's not worth your time.
2006-12-13 13:25:43 · answer #10 · answered by kameka 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋