I think she is way to young and has a life in front of her. My mother see the baby as child # 8.( which I am the Oldest of) My sister will do what she is told.She is terrified Icant be the only one that sees it. I want to tell her se has an option. I just dont know how with out being chastized. Then I will be un able to help at all. Did I mention No One was aware until yhey had to do an emergancy c section that she was pregnant. You think you would know,but you would be suprised on wht a baggy t shirt and some nevity can hide.
2006-12-13 11:43:14 · 47 answers · asked by Baby Liam due 6/8/09 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Hi, First, what does your sister REALLY want to do? It is her choice, not your Mother or you. She has to make the ultimate decision and she is the one that is going to have to live with whatever she decides to do. The law is on her side, so don't let anyone bully or make the decision for her. Both you and your mother should sit down with your sister, give her all the options available and assure her that you love her and will support whatever she decides. She will eventually resent and might become estranged if she does not do what SHE wants and just goes along with whatever everyone else decides. Good Luck to all of you!
2006-12-13 11:51:35 · answer #1 · answered by sunshinesue_1999 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all no one should try and sway your mother or your sister into adoption. Ultimately it is your sister's decision on whether or not to keep the baby. If your mom wants to help and take care of it is her business. If you try and push what you think is right, you may be faced with a lot of resentment down the road and that would put a big wedge between you and your sister,possibly your mom too. If there is any question in her mind as to keep the baby she should see a professional therapist and really talk through this with someone. Adoption is a big decision and shouldn't be pushed on someone and shouldn't be decided by someone who is not the child's parent. The best thing you can do is support your sister and let her know that you are there for her no matter what she decides to do. Believe me been through the same situation I had custody of my 15 year old sister and she got pregnant and i told her no matter what she decided i would be there for her. And now she has her son and has made a complete change around from the wild young partier that she used to be. So in her case he has settled her down and now she is about to graduate with honors (early)!
2006-12-13 11:51:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that it sould be ultimatly your sisters choice, even though she is only 13, she is the one that will have to live with the choise. Maybe she can talk to a school counseler or someone that she trusts and they can find out what she really wants. I am guessing she wants to keep the baby if she went the full term without telling anyone about it and not doing anything, like having an abortion, during that time. Good Luck!
2006-12-13 16:42:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is a decision your sister has to make on her own, dont try to convince her to give the baby up because that may not be what she wants to do and she may resent you for it later. Your sister is still young but she made the decision to have sex and she made the decision to follow through with the pregnancy instead of having an abortion so now she needs to make the decision(ON HER OWN) whether or not to keep this baby.
You as her older sister should sit her down and talk to her and tell her all the responsibilities that come along with having a baby . . . the good and the bad.
2006-12-13 11:51:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are very correct! Adoption is perfect. Sway your mother with the argument that a baby with two YOUNG parents that only focus on her and have a whole life ahead of them is better than a having only a 13 year old mother. Please! Would a child want to know that her mother was a disgrace to all women and had a child at souch a young age???
2006-12-14 10:46:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if I was your mom, I'd keep it and raise it as my own as well. It's her baby's child! Why should there be a problem with your mom adopting the baby? That way, your sister can have a life.
I've heard stories of women not knowing that they were pregnant until they went in to the ER with back or abdominal pain and the baby either crowned or showed up on an x-ray. Not much surprises me anymore.
2006-12-13 16:44:45 · answer #6 · answered by babygirlnc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow 13yr old and had a baby ,my grandmother was 14 and she kept her baby married the man and lived happily ever after.(fairy talus just don't seem to happen anymore).
Your sister must not be that terrified ,else she would not of had sex.
Is your mum a good mum? and is she going to raise this baby as here own.
As that's what i would do or help your sister as much as i could and try to make sure your sister gets on with her life , Which maybe she wont the baby and will be a great mum.
Good luck to you all .
2006-12-13 11:56:24 · answer #7 · answered by ismelllikeroses2003 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is your sisters decision but seeing as she is a minor your mother will most likely be the one to support and raise the child. She is very young and she does have a lot of life ahead of her but she made the choice of having unprotected sex. I was a young mother also. I was 17 when I had my son. That is still a big age gap but no less a big decision. I have a wonderful son and I could not imagine my life without him. I say give her a chance. People do the most amazing things when they are forced to live up to their actions.
2006-12-13 11:50:42 · answer #8 · answered by gemir69 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that what your mother has decided is between her and your sister. You did not have that baby, your sister did. You are not that baby's mother or grandmother so you have no say in who raises it.
Seriously, you will find out that your family is going to do things that you think are absolutely crazy but the only person on this Earth whom you need to worry about is YOU. If you don't agree with what your mother and sister are doing, then bookmark that thought in your mind and vow to raise your children differently.
Your mom raised 7 kids, I think she knows quite well what she is getting into. If you are mad or jealous of your sister for getting the attention right now, then you need to work on that on your own.
2006-12-13 11:53:29 · answer #9 · answered by TrixyLoo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mother is not going to let your sister make her own choice. IF you get involved you may make things worse for all three of you. If your mother is willing to have her keep the baby than I say let her keep the family together.( it's rare that parents will be that supportive in raising or help raising there kids' children) Your sister made her own choice to have sex and hide the fact that she was pregnant. Your mom is probably not going to let your sister make anymore decisions.
If you start anything you may get caught in the crossfire. Just be a supportive aunt and sister and let your mom and your sister iron it out.
2006-12-13 11:52:58 · answer #10 · answered by mistyfan69 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋