these male friends are getting high in the hall way at school and she keeps thinking these kids are her friends i keep telling her that they are not her friends but she feels as if she can help them out and tell them to stop getting high what do i do she is not make good decisions
2006-12-13 10:39:23 · 15 answers · asked by febuary 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
She needs to hear the story about the sparrows and the canary. Seems like a little old lady had a canary that sang beautifully. One day a group of sparrows came and began living outside her bedroom window and chirped noisily. After a few days the lady was so annoyed with the noisy chirping she said to herself, "I'll put my canary out in the tree and he can teach the sparrows to sing beautifully like she does". Well the next day she did that 1st thing in the morning. That evening she brought the canary back in to her bedroom . . . and guess what? The canary had learned how to chirp noisily.
A person cannot save the world from itself, neither can your step daughter "save" them from themselves. She might end up being the canary. I'd sure keep an eye on that.
2006-12-13 14:46:57 · answer #1 · answered by snddupree 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My sister tried to do this. I knew many girls in high school that felt they can change these people. Well let me tell you now, it never works. They get they’re hearts broken and wind up doing stupid things. Don't come down on her to hard. She will try to revolt against you. Instead use psychology. Another words make it horrible that these people are doing drugs, but show that almost none of them will stop. Try to keep her away from them when you can. You can also call guidance counselors and have them removed. Most likely she’s going to end up going thru all the motions and learn for herself. Sometimes it’s better that way. Just make sure she knows doing drugs is wrong.
2006-12-13 11:15:02 · answer #2 · answered by Johnny L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should be concerned and actively monitor the situation from a distance.....
Your daughter is taking on a mission that few others would be willing to take on, helping people overcome an addiction. That speaks VOLUMES about you Mom, and how you raised your daughter. She knows what is right, and what is wrong, and more importantly you don't turn your back on someone in trouble!
However she is probably over her head, but at 15 you stand a good chance of doing more damage trying to stop her, as these "friends"....as long as you monitor what is going on. (As in she's not going to "parties" with these new friends and her association is limited to school, or school sponsored functions).
2006-12-13 10:58:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
At 15 you have to start trusting her some. Sit down and talk with her about what could happen if one of these guys goes off when he is high. (Like thinking he is superman and talking a flying leap). Remind her never to get in a car with these guys or be alone. Let her know that you are open to talking to her and helping her make good decisions.
2006-12-13 10:46:46 · answer #4 · answered by kny390 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my God...She cares too much! Im the same way but i dont be smoking in school. Just tell her a pothead is always going to be a pothead and theres nothing she can do to stop them. Its their choice to smoke or not. I made my decision to smoke and it actually keeps me relaxed and helps me get through a day of school. AND IM PASSING WHAT NOW?!?! AHAHAH!
2006-12-13 11:20:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Geez woman! you make it sound like getting high is a horrible thing... lots of people get high... what drugs are her friends using? if its just marijuana, let it be and be glad she isn't smokin up too... I dont like people who judge someone on the drugs they use... its their decision, and it's no ones place to tell them its a wrong decision... you cant look at this from just one point of view, they could have reasons for using drugs, just because you are a good parent doesnt mean they have good parents, they may not get dinner when they go home, they may have grown up their entire life seeing their dad beat their mom, being beat by their dad... you dont know and you shouldnt put a persons personality and character on the escape they chose...
You've seen this from your perspective, you've prolly seen it from your daughters, but you havent seen it from the perspective of these guys... I know what its like to have my friends parents not want them around me, I'm a lot like those guys... I'm 16 and I get high at school, I'm 16 and I deal drugs at school, I'm 16 and I've been through more than most people go through in a life time... dont judge someone by their actions... I believe that everyone has a reason for what they do and its not simply for the fun of it, everyone is covering up pain in drugs and alcohol abuse... your daughter may be the good friend they have, the one that is keeping them from shooting up the school... The high school next to mine was shot up today, and it wasnt by a drug addict or user... everyone makes mistakes, everyone does things they shouldnt, your daughter knows them better than you and I think you should leave the decision of being friends with them up to her... its not your place... she probably knows their situation much better than you... learn some empathy, dont fear what you dont understand... give them a place to hang out but dont allow drugs in your house...
PS - one of my best friends, her parents told her she wasnt allowed to hang out with me anymore because I drink and I do drugs, the next day she came up to me and said "lets go blaze" and since then shes been doing drugs with me because her parents forbided her from seeing me
2006-12-13 13:52:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well..you cant choose her friends, you can only talk to her, but if she wants these friends, she will have them and if she wants to like make desisions, then she will..u cant b with her 24/7..but u can make it so its like u r in her mind 24/7..but i wouldnt worry too much about these kids..they will get whats commin to them
2006-12-13 12:40:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because what they do is wrong doen't mean they don't have friends. Your not her mom, I have a step-dad I really hate him because he thinks he knows everything when he doesn't. Mind your business or she will hate you.
2006-12-13 13:08:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
These guys might try to get her high to have sex with her. They might pressure her to get high.
2006-12-13 11:31:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well talk to her about it and if she doesnt listen then let her learn on her own. You learn from your mistakes♥
2006-12-13 11:06:40 · answer #10 · answered by sonya3091 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋