or lines from the show. Please, no "D'oh!" or "Eat My Shorts, Ay Caramba!" or anything totally typical. Don't forget the hundred's of other characters on the show ;) One of my favorites is when homer gets kidnapped by the martians and he says "please don't eat me, i have a wife and two kids.....eat them!" lol
2006-12-13 10:32:55 · 13 answers · asked by Christian 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Comics & Animation
Comic book guy when he sees the Itchy and Scratchy episode with Poochy: "Worst. Episode. Ever."
Otto seeing a meteor shower: "I don't need drugs to enjoy this, just to ENHANCE it!"
Homer, thinking about Flanders in a speedo: "Stupid sexy Flanders!"
2006-12-13 10:42:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Actually, some of the funniest lines on the show aren't even spoken. They're from Bart writing on the blackboard during the opening credits. Some of them just tickle the imagination, thinking about how he came to have to write the following on the blackboard 100 times:
"The First Amendment does not cover burping"
"I did not see Elvis"
"Garlic gum is not funny"
"I will not encourage others to fly"
"Tar is not a plaything"
"I will not Xerox my butt"
"I will not trade pants with others"
"I will not drive the principals's car"
"I will not pledge allegience to Bart"
"I will not make flatulent noises in class"
"I will not belch the national anthem"
"I am not a dentist"
"Spitwads are not free speech"
"Underwear should be worn on the inside"
"Funny noises are not funny"
"I will not prescribe medication"
"My name is not Dr. Death"
"I will not bring sheep to class"
"Nobody likes a sunburn slapper"
"A burp is not an answer"
"No one is interested in my underpants"
"I do not have diplomatic immunity"
"I will never win an Emmy" (this was from the early seasons)
"I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers"
"My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man" (reference to The Fugitive)
"The Pledge of Allegience does not end in 'Hail Satan'"
"There are plenty of businesses like show business"
"I will not re-transmit without the expressed written permission of Major League Baseball"
"Beans are neither fruit nor musical"
"I am not the reincarnation of Sammy Davis Jr"
Mud is not one of the 4 food groups"
"I am not certified to remove asbestos"
"I will return the seeing-eye dog"
2006-12-13 11:02:00 · answer #2 · answered by Capt. Obvious 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Homer: "And how is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?"
2006-12-13 10:42:42 · answer #3 · answered by DemoDicky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For some really great homer quotes go to the homer sound board.
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/homer.html
2006-12-13 10:42:28 · answer #4 · answered by Rainlilly4545 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The one where groundskeeper Willie exclaims, "Aye, there's 'narry an animal alive tha' can outrun a greased Scotsman!"
2006-12-13 11:58:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have to give it to Homer for "woohooo good things do happen to bad people"
2006-12-13 11:12:50 · answer #6 · answered by smart mouth 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like the one by Homer:
"When a women says nothings wrong, Everythings wrong and when a women says everythings wrong EVERYTHINGS wrong."
Cracks me up every time.
2006-12-13 10:40:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Doh!
that covers evrything.
2006-12-14 05:43:03 · answer #8 · answered by african_woman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
" Doooooonuuts" *homer drooling"
2006-12-13 11:10:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
homer said " i am so smart, smrt, i mean smart"
2006-12-13 14:44:58 · answer #10 · answered by jencmhung 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋