I have a really vice when it comes to going out(dancing/bar etc..)I do the white man 80's *******(so my wife says) and I hate going because when weve gone in the past i'm ready to go and she wants to stay! I think that come as a couple leave as a couple and I hate that so much!! that I would rather us not go.I have a really issue with not trusting other men!!(ya I know) but she has to stay till close to closing alll the time and she wanders talking to everyone especially other men.and I have such a stupid jealsous side.(and always thinking stupid **** like guys are gonna get her drunk and try to take her home or you here in the paper about date rape stuff) Am I a fool if not help me any good advice or links
2006-12-13 08:27:25 · 11 answers · asked by lost 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Oh little town of Bethlehem, How still we see thee lie?
2006-12-13 08:33:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've always viewed the bar scene as a singles scene. Why would I want to go there as a couple unless there is a specific event going on that we need to be at? It's not a desirable scene. My question is why would your wife want to go there? Is she (sorry for the phrase) an "attention whore?" or is she just a party girl? If she's a party girl, and you're not a party boy, you may have more issues coming up to deal with then you really want.... Both of you should respect each other and that means if she wants to stay til close and you want to leave, why can't you meet in the middle? Can't she understand that this is not fun for you? What is she getting out of going to these places? That is what I would be wondering. Perhaps if you could identify what she gets out of going, and see if there are other ways to satisfy that need, you might find a good solution... good luck!
2006-12-13 16:41:13 · answer #2 · answered by Peace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like youre over-reacting a bit here, but really dont blame you for feeling this way with all the crap going on in the world. You just cant go on with life if youre worried about what might or might not happen especially if shes with you. Maybe too much TV or newspapers. You cant control her every move either. Try to put these ideas out of your mind the best you can and enjoy the moment and being out with her. Jealousy has its own good points at times but is such a pain in others, but you cant let it control you or your feelings
2006-12-13 16:41:44 · answer #3 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I feel that you should take it easy and take some reading material and sit there and read while she enjoys socializing. I guess you have to trust and have faith in your wife rather than on other people around her. Just be vigilant to see if she is behaving fine without her knowing about it. Once you do what she wants like staying late, next time you can negotiate with her about leaving early. Just alternate between leaving early and staying late. That way both of you are in a win-win situation. I feel that your jealousy and insecurity should not curb her idea of enjoyment. You never know you may also start enjoying. Good luck
2006-12-13 17:06:04 · answer #4 · answered by SP 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she is talking to other men but you are right there. it is not like she is doing it behind your back. she should calm down a bit ..if she is flirty in her conversations. she should not be giving you a reason to be jealous. she should include you on the converstion as well an not leave you sitting there in a bar by yourself. this seems a lil' disrespectful of her. walk around with her an jump into it all.
2006-12-13 16:33:30 · answer #5 · answered by ~just_jd~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like you've grown up and she hasn't yet. Tell her your concerns and feelings. Maybe she'll get the picture.
I wouldn't tolerate such adolecent behavior from my wife (and no, I'm not a control freak), but I don't have any other advice to offer you... You should do what you need to do to find happiness.
2006-12-13 16:38:29 · answer #6 · answered by Ritz Grimarren 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You had better stay as long as she stays unless you want her sleeping with other guys. Sorry.
Any married woman who wants to stay alone in a bar until closing without her husband is looking for SOMETHING.....
2006-12-13 16:37:25 · answer #7 · answered by fucose_man 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Danger Danger Danger
(robotic arms flapping)
2006-12-13 16:38:53 · answer #8 · answered by onlineseeker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop going to bars so often and it at home together instead of being tempted at the bars.
2006-12-13 16:34:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why dont you try friends parties instead of going to bars? this way the two of you are around friends and you shouldnt feel so jealous!
2006-12-13 16:37:58 · answer #10 · answered by thinkofmealwayslver 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋