What happened to disciplining children?

Question

I went to a restaurant today for lunch with my dad. There was a table next to us, two young women with 3 children between them, ages 3-6 I would say. Those little bastards were running wild all over the restaurant. They tripped the waitress that was bringing our food because they were playing tag or some crap, and she dropped it and had to get new food made up. In short, I didnt get any lunch because my hour was up by the time the second plates came out. When I was little, I would have NEVER been allowed to act that way in public. I remember throwing a fit in mcdonalds one time and getting my *** whipped. After that I knew better. If I would have done then what those kids were doing today, I wouldnt have been able to sit for a week. And these mothers didnt bat an eyelash. All they did was say "honey, you wanna come sit with mama and eat?" What the hell??? What has happened to parents? And they wonder why the little hellions are in juvie at the age of 9.

Answer 1

I don't believe in child abuse (as some people take it too far ) but i believe in dicipline- i use to get the wooden spoon and i gave it to my kids, only when they would go bazzurk, once every 6 months but i pulled that spoon out when they were playing up and left it on the kitchen bench, they knew what it was for, i have 2 of the most beutifull, loving, well adjusted kids , Now 20 and 19. when they were little they would non stop fight about anything, even if they were breathing the same air in a room, it drove me bonkers, however, whenever i took them out, people would allways comment what well mannered children they were. I feel a smack on the **** every now and then is better than a punch in the head latter in life because they haven't learnt boundaries, or worse still a jail term for not respecting others, children will push parents and others over the limits to test them, if the parent doesn't take charge, then heaven help society. Saying that i think parents need to set out guide lines and not be too heavy handed and unfortunately alot of parents are too heavy with physical punishment and then damage the child phycologically.. I would say the problem is not so much with the toddlers as they were just having fun and were probally as excited as all to be at this big party house with lots of people and food, the problem was with the parents with their lack of consideration for others, they probally were treating it as a break from the kids and to tire the kids out so they'd sleep when they got home so they could relax. unfortunately alot of people are so self centred that they don't give a damn if you have a problem with it as long as they get what they want- the good side of all this is that those parents will have more than their hands full when those kids are teenagers, imagine for one minute what it would be like living in that house. Brrrrrrr i dread to think.

Answer 2

I do not know. That is a good question. I think that parents assume that if they show authority, their child will resent them for not allowing them to be the cool kid with no boundaries or rules. Do you remember the days when you were jealous of your friends that where allowed out stay out later then you ? I think that the majority of parents would rather anticipate a best friend type of relationship with their child rather then risk hearing " I hate you, mum " ( Or dad ) They think that by allowing them to practically do what they want, they will maintain a good relationship with them. Although, in the long run, i think that a parents that is strong enough to show discipline deserves a lot more respect then a one that lets their child run riot. My parents have 3 kids and personally, i think they have been far too lenient on my little sister. Consequently, she is the most troublesome one. I think it is because she is the only girl and is the youngest. I feel that she does not have enough discipline or responsibilities. At 15 years old, she does absolutely nothing for herself. It is not that she is incapable of doing these things, it is down to the fact that my parents willingly run around after her catering to her every demand with no objections. She is used to getting her own way. If i had custody of her, there would be a lot of changes.

Answer 3

There is nothing wrong with a whipping across the butt, but when overdisciplining that is child abuse. One mother was saying she doesn't like other people discipling their kids I did not hesitate well maybe she should look after the little brat. Also parents defend their children but I would not defend someone who trips a waitress. I agree with you. Parents are so paranoid and cant differentiate between child abuse and a simple spanking

Answer 4

This all started when people started teling children "Your parents cant hit you." now parents are afraid to discipline thier children for fear of someone calling childrens services. Also, so many young kids are having kids that they dont know how to discipline them, they are babies themselves. It's quite sad I have been in your shoes. No-one says taking care of children is easy but there must be boundaries. It;s a shame for the waitress, for you and the other guests. Sadly, if the mothers didnt bat an eye then their children probably act that way on a regular basis. Sad sad sad.

Answer 5

I totally agree!! It's like watching Supernanny! That show drives me crazy! They think everything can be fixed by kind words! WHATEVER! Sometimes you need to just bust their asses! Not beat them, but spank them! I don't have kids yet, but I promise, they will be disciplined the right way. Do people not realize that's why their kids are holy terrors and that's why their kids get in so much trouble?

It all started when people said that spanking was abuse, and supposedly parents were getting their children taken away from them for spanking. I guess now days it's just not the right thing to do! I call BS on that one!

Answer 6

People don't realize there are other ways to discipline besides spanking, and that spanking is okay as long as you don't overdo it. I have never hit my child, but when she goes out, she knows she better not act up. Parents are too permissive these days, it's not "do you want to?" It's "YOU WILL." I would have spoken to the manager and also the mothers, they were probably too busy chatting to notice that the rudeness of their children was affecting others. There should be classes before some people are allowed to breed, something!

Answer 7

Because unfortunately, what was called "discipline" back when we were young is now called "abuse". Our society has made our children soft. Now we must respect their feelings rather than discipline them. Then those that told us not to spank our children will be the first to point the finger at us and call us bad parents if our child goes and shoots up their school. Had they been spanked when they were bad, maybe they wouldn't have too much free range to do bad things.

Answer 8

Child protective services are to blame for the way children act these days. No one is allowed to punish their kids the way they see fit. They are afraid of being accused of child abuse, having their kids taken away from them, or going to jail, therefore, they just let them run wild and do as they please. This is the main reason I don't have children, and never will (I'm 31). When you have kids, you've got major problems. And those problems I can do without!

Answer 9

i dont mind properly disciplining children, ive met several little brats like that myself. but there is a line between discipline and child abuse. many modern parents do not cross that line. but youd be suprised, when i lived in india when i was still little, my parents were very modern, all they did when i got into trouble was yell at me, and they would often hit me, too. this type of discipline started when i was four. but that was nothing compared to what some of my friends were facing with their parents. in my neighborhood, one of the most common punishments was beating your child with a belt. or, in schools, children were hit on the hand with a ruler or a switch. once, my first grade teacher slapped me across the face just because i forgot to do my homework. but the worst punishment i had ever seen was when a parent heated a spatula on the stove and burned their child's hand with it. you should be thank ful for those child abuse laws.

Answer 10

Blame society......
In general, CPS and spanking children has become such a public no, no that people are afraid to discipline their children.

However, Next time grow some balls, and speak up to the parent - let her know how she sucks as a mother and that you hope to die young so that you can ensure your life will not be ruled by such ill mannered members of society.