not wanting sex?

Question

I do not want to have sex anymore. I hate it. My husband does not understand, Nor really do I. I just don't want to anymore. I feel my body is being being invaded. Has anyone else had this problem? Thanks for any input

Answer 1

GIRL, don't listen to these people that are saying you need a counselor or something. I totally understand what you are saying!!! I just asked a similar question, not even 5 minutes ago. My idea is this, women have evolved a lot over the past century! We have grow as a species in many ways. God created man and woman to reproduce and populate our planet however I don't think that God wanted us to continue on repopulating our planet to the point where we use up all of our resources and ultimately destroy our species. Women are the ones that I believe God has allowed to evolve to the point that we just don't have the need to "repopulate" (having sex) I do not like having sex with my husband or anyone else most of the time because I seriously feel more like I'm being "raped" then anything. I hate the fact that my husband looks at me as a piece of meat. I know he loves me, but my body just doesn't feel the need to have sex. There is nothing wrong with you girl! We have just evolved for the better. I'm so, so glad that another women feels the way I do.
God Bless you.
P.S. I do have three wonderful kids that I wouldn't trade for the world.

Answer 2

There are so many reasons why you may be having these feelings. Part of the solution to it is knowing the background of the problem. You haven't given very many details here, but here are some questions to consider:

Could you be experiencing fluctuating hormones? Have you experienced recent change in your diet or any medications?

Is your relationship with your husband strained at this point for some reason? Have you been experiencing major stress in your life? Stress can play a big part in inhibiting your sexuality.

I'm sorry you're going through this, and I'm hoping that you find a solution soon. It must be very frustrating for both you and your husband.

The best place to start is by going to your doctor for some blood tests. A doctor can rule out many factors with a few simple tests.

I hope you are on the right track soon.

Blessings,
JustanAngel

Answer 3

It is definitely an extreme feeling. I am guessing you aren't too old to not get any sexual feelings. However, you feel that way probably because sex hasn't been how it is supposed to be for you. You feel invaded. That means you've had to endure sex when you actually weren't ready to. You despise sex. That probably is because it was done in a way that hurt you instead of giving you pleasure.

Seeing your doctor might help. It could be a medical issue that could be corrected. But, I feel it's got to do a lot with the psychological effect of not-so-consentual sex.

Instead of saying "I don't want to have sex anymore", try telling him that you'd like to "want some time and space for a while". If it has to do with the way it is performed, you may have to completely change the way you have sex. Either way, discussing it with your husband is vital. Hope he understands and respects your feelings.

Answer 4

Okay i am pretty sure your husband does not understand it because you all are married and that is what most married couples do but you need to get down to the root of your problem is it something that your husband is doing or isnt doing like seriously what is wrong you need to talk to him because if you don't he will find someone else to give him what you should have given him. I don't mean to sound rude but seriously there have to be something going on maybe you should do it less, or maybe you all should try new things because the way it sounds it sounds like you all do it almost everynight so yeah of course you will be sick of it so just slow it down don't do it as much and then you would want it more.

Answer 5

Perhaps you should seek out some form of counseling from either a sex therapist or relationship counselor for this problem. I know a lot of woman that when they are going through the change of life have this difficulty as their hormones are changing and they do not have the same lubrication they did when they were younger, so enjoy it less and sometimes find it painful. But this is a healthy and loving part of any relationship and as such you should perhaps speak with your family doctor first and he may recommend some options or refer you to someone else who may be able to help you in this area. Best of luck to both you and your partner with this matter.

Answer 6

There is something dis-connecting between the two of you and I'd highly encourage you to get into counseling. Most of the time, when the desire isn't there, it has more to do with other issues then with actual sex. Also, lack of sexual desire is a common symptom of depression- do you think this might be the situation? Do you still love your husband? Do you want to enjoy a healthy, happy sex life? There are so many resources out there to help, and it's all worth it. Take care.

Answer 7

I love sex, I couldnt imagine going through life with out it. I would seriously consider seeking thearapy with a qualified therapist that specialized in sexual disfunction. I'm not trying to be insulting when I say that you are disfunctional, but there is obviously some issue that you need to work out. Your desire not to have sex could be caused by many factors such as trauma or medication you are taking. I know from experience if you are takng a prescription for an anti-depressant (I was taking Paxil) that can cause loss of sexual appetite, I had no desire for at least a year. Anyways I do hope you consider counseling

Answer 8

Don't pay attention to the rude ones on here,and I doubt that it is you. 98.8% of the time, it is your marriage or your attraction to the husband just is not there anymore. Unless something traumatic has happened to you recently, those are the hidden problems that only you will be able to fix. It wont just go away though, and some of these folks on here are right about 1 thing,
Husbands or lets say men in general wont put up with that. Sorry, but that is how they are programed.

Answer 9

Therapy would be a good idea for you. Not wanting to have sex anymore and feeling invaded by your husband is not a normal reaction. Something is behind all this and I think you need to find out what it is.

Answer 10

It can be hormonal, psychological, or a combination. Talk to your physician and insist on seeing a specialist. This can inflict a lot of trauma on a marriage. Include your husband in the discussions with your doctors so that he understands the situation and also so he knows you're taking a proactive approach towards a resolution. It can be fixed, you just have to be willing to make the effort and your husband needs to be patient and supportive. Good Luck.