My women friends are always complaining about the crappy guys they date. "John is so inconsiderate..." "Dave just never listens..." "This is the second time I have caught Kevin cheating on me..." I'm getting tired of giving advice...over and over and over... For the love of God!!! Why don't they get it? You can't change people!!!!
Some behaviors are modifiable with some training. Peeing on the toilet seat or the wall...totally modifiable. Putting the toothpaste cap back on the tube...totally modifiable. Cussing...totally modifiable. Hobbies...NOT MODIFIABLE. Cheating...NOT MODIFIABLE. Abusing...NOT MODIFIABLE. Womanizing...NOT MODIFIABLE. Daily routines (sleeping in/going to bed late, watching Sunday sports with friends, etc.)...probably NOT MODIFIABLE.
Why don't many women get this?
"I just want to change him. I can. I know he is a good person."
No, he isn't. Please...learn to live with your situation, or do something about it and find a better guy.
2006-12-13 06:19:44 · 12 answers · asked by xxx 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Men are from Mars and women are from Venus. When a guy first meets a girl he must do what it takes to cater to their ego. He is sweet, caring, and even opens up the door for the girl (Because we are trying to get them in bed). As time goes by the woman eventually falls for the man. And once the man realizes that we have now in fact trapped them, we do a complete 360 in attitude change. We burp, drink an excess amount of beer, and hold the covers over her head when we fart. We have gone back to our original selves and now the woman must cater to our ego praying that he will one day change back to the sweet, caring man she once met and fell in love with. But you are absolutely right my friend, women can not change who we are and all women need to realize that we are way beyond modifiable for we are from two different planets.
2006-12-13 06:42:44 · answer #1 · answered by Jason K 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, from personal experience, I think many women fall in love with a man's potential, instead of who he is right now. Many women also feel a need to "fix things" and so they find themself with "fixer uppers" or men that come with an "assembly required" tag. It's alsmost as though these women would have no purpose in life, if they were not fixing someone.
It's much easier to focus on the faults of others, rather than yourself, if women are so busy looking at thier mates perceived faults, then they don't have time (or desire) to look at thier own.
Bottom line, we all have a choice as to who we date. They should seek better matches from the start and not try to "fix" them to get to that level. Not everyone is suited for each other. You just end up being miserable and making your man resent you because he evidently can't make you happy.
Lastly, so much of this also comes with age. I think the older a woman gets, the more she realizes you can't change people. Plus, she also gets to the point where she really has no energy or desire to do so. It's sometimes just better to be alone than to deal with that.
2006-12-13 06:27:18 · answer #2 · answered by Singthing 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bravo!!! I am one of the few women that totally believe and get what you're saying because all of my men friends say so!!
Women are nurturers by nature. We have all been sold on this principle( either by our upbringing, media, society) that relationships are supposed to be like the fairy tales that are stuffed down our throats that we read as kids. And plus women have an amazing bravado...."He may have done that to her, but he will never do that to me"!! Wrong. Double- wrong. But its hard to get that through our heads sometimes.
I have learned the best way to get the long lasting attention I desire from a guy is to "treat 'em like I don't need 'em". For me that means to be more like a buddy than a sex siren.
It works. I totally have my woman thing down (sexy clothes, cute come-hither looks, good cook) and use that as a trump card once I have secured his attention. All of my friends come to me for advice in that area.
Great question!
2006-12-13 06:27:47 · answer #3 · answered by Bathroom Graffiti 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Genetic Coding
2006-12-13 06:20:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The brain of a woman in love turns to jelly, and mothering instincts kick in with a vengeance. They never forget that the difference between men and boys is the price of their toys, and they set about to re-raise their new little boy in their image. And unless they wake up and apply the brakes to their unwelcome and comical meddling, disaster ensues.
Right on, Bro! You're very insightful.
So, ladies--PAY ATTENTION!
2006-12-13 06:26:23 · answer #5 · answered by Dorothy and Toto 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think part of that is due to the 'mothering' nature that most women have. They DO see some good and those are likely
the qualities that attracted them to the particular man but on the other hand they are blinded to the bad qualities.
For most of us.....wisdom comes with age and we wake up.
Try to show a little compassion though.
2006-12-13 06:24:14 · answer #6 · answered by Edisto 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
specific i might experience insulted except she gave a logical reason alongside with it quite is a shade that would not experience your complexion, that's too small / super, and so on. If she tried to alter my dress for the different reason, i might attempt to alter HERS with the help of making techniques as to that's a greater effective shade, it is sublime, and so on. Then while she responded with a detrimental remark, i might replica it and place it on the mattress for her so as that she ought to work out my reaction to her attack on MY clothing. If she responds certainly, i might additionally replica her reaction then look heavily into her techniques. Then shall we sit down down and function a mature talk approximately the two our clothing. *Golden Rule*: Do unto others as you will possibly have them do unto you. Edit: Ello Vee: i admire having a female opinion on the subject of the clothing I positioned on. I used to ask my sister for her perspectives in the previous she moved away. in case you have time, possibly shall we save mutually so as that i ought to get your perspectives, lol? Joking, yet i actual have become a greater effective shopper. My style in clothing has better or perhaps while i'm procuring clothing as presents for others, they now remark on, and rave approximately, the commonplace of my possibilities. not all adult men are clueless purchasers, you already know. that's a stereotype created with the help of clueless male purchasers, lol.
2016-10-14 21:12:58 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women go into a relationship hoping the man will change. Men go into it hoping the woman doesn't.
2006-12-13 06:21:46 · answer #8 · answered by Scott M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From my experience women will always try to change you, even if you are too good they will say you are boring and you need to be a bit more crazy. and I think they will only accept the man as he is, when they get less attractive and feeling older.
2006-12-13 06:28:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
not all of us do that but yes a lot do and i think it is because they have lowself of steem them self ,
and this gives them some thing to do.
they think they r better in some ways to .
well some of them do
2006-12-13 06:23:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋