i'm 16 years old and 25 weeks pregnant. But when I see young girls on here asking for advice, i also see many people saying "you're too young" or "what were you thinking?" people make mistakes but why cant a 16 year old girl be a good mother? how does anybody know a 16 year old couldnt be a better mom than a 30 year old. Yes its based on maturity and how much you can provide for your child but, i dont think its right when there are 16 year old girls like myself that dont mind giving things up to support and love her child. I know this is yahoo answers but im just wondering why people think teens who get pregnant wont be good parents.
2006-12-13 05:26:04 · 28 answers · asked by Bri~ 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
the father is involved and we both work and my mother is going to watch the baby while i take classes at a local radiology school.
2006-12-13 05:30:24 · update #1
no state help. Its not for me, i never believed in it. it only starts bad habits
2006-12-13 05:32:02 · update #2
You are right, there are some 16 yr olds out there that make better moms than some 30 yrs old. It all depends on the person and their own maturity level. 16 is a young age to be having a baby, however there are young women your age that I have known that have had babies and have had babies that made great mothers and did finish school and have gone on to provide very well for the child. You have your mother's help and the baby's dad and that is important. Good luck hun.
2006-12-13 06:29:12 · answer #1 · answered by dini 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The fact is your a child and children should not have children, I am not against teens getting pregnant and keeping the baby if say BC failed or a condom broke, I hate these idiot teens who go get knocked up on purpose.
You say you and the dad are together right now but the fact is more then half of teen mothers end up single mothers because as the time nears for you to go in labor reality starts to set into the dads head and he walks away, it is a lot easier for a man to walk away then the mother. My high school had the highest rate of teen pregnancy in our state and I can not tell you how many girls I new who got pregnant and the dads stuck around for a few months and acted all excited but by the time the baby was born he was gone.
I was 16 when I got pregnant and it was HARD..I am in college now but without my parents I would not be where I am. If your boyfriend is the same age as you then you and him are not going to be able to support a child even if you are both working and between taking classes and working when exactly are you even going to see or take care of the baby? I guess your mom will raise it and I am very sure your parents will be paying money for the child, I am sorry but two kids working minimum wage jobs can not afford a baby, they can not even afford half the stuff for it.
2006-12-13 05:45:11 · answer #2 · answered by Diamonds_Glow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We found out my middle daughter was pregnant the week after she turned 16. So, yes she got pregnant at 15. She decided to have the baby. Yes, my husband and I helped her out. My husband was working days and I was working nights so when our grandson got to be around 9 months old, and he didn't sleep as much during the day, I quit work so he wouldn't have to go to daycare. My daughter graduated with the rest of her class and has held down a full time job since then. She has married and is expecting her 3rd child. No she did not marry her son's father. He fell by the wayside long ago, but her son is now 8 years old and in the 3rd grade. He is a wonderful child and so is his 2 year old sister.
My daughter will be the first to tell you that she missed out on a lot in high school but she also did a lot. If you have a good support system and help from family then you will be fine. I say take the Medicaid though. Children need insurance.
2006-12-13 05:40:28 · answer #3 · answered by nana4dakids 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with what most have said...it's not so much that 16 year olds will be bad mothers, but it's that a young woman is going to have another human being dependent on them when they are not completely independent for themselves! I think it's great that you are continuing your education and you understand the importance of that. But are you independent? You are not taking state aid, so who pays for school? Who pays the rent, food, clothing, etc...
You are not independent until you stop taking money from your parents.
Again, I am not saying you will be a bad mother, I am sure you will be very loving! And it's not just about giving things up...every parent gives things up for their child, no matter the age of the parent. It's only that a 16 year old has experienced so much less of life than a 30 year old. Think about how you have changed over the last 2 years and what you have learned from your life experiences. We all grow and learn with every year we live.
I'm sure you can do it, but I think most people just wonder what is the rush?
Good luck to you and congrats!
2006-12-13 05:47:39 · answer #4 · answered by seaelen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I couldn't help but comment on this one. I see alot of people putting down a child that has gotten pregnant and if they are really that much more mature and that much more together, what do they get out of being so immature in putting down a baby that's in a rough spot in her life? I think alot of those women are really insecure and are worried about different aspects in their life, and it's only normal to justify and think "well, at least I'm married" some other positive points in their life. I got pregnant when I was 18 and sure, it was rough at first, but my age didn't mean I was going to automatically be a bad mother and live off government help-lol. That is ridiculous. By the time I was 20, my b/f and I were doing better that most adults we knew and by 21 we had built our first home, at 22 we got married and now I'm 23 and pregnant with my second. You can def. do it. Sounds like you got your head together:) I'm sure you'll be a great mom and don't let others opinions bring you down. Just cause' they are married and 27 doesn't mean their husband isn't bangin' the grocery store clerk, or that they have $50,000 in unsec. debt. My point in all this is there are ALOT of situations that are cause for alarm when comes to bringing a baby into the world besides age, it's never easy or a "convenient" time. Good Luck to you sweethart!
2006-12-13 05:41:09 · answer #5 · answered by Dolphin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are right to the extent that emotional maturity does not always come with age. So, yes, 16 year olds can be great mothers.
On the other hand, a sixteen year old is still growing. Your body is still maturing. There is also plenty of schooling ahead of you so that you can enter the workforce with a good degree. Motherhood is demanding enough, and most people cannot handle both motherhood and going to school at the same time. It is not just the love and support that you can offer the the baby. It helps to have academic qualifications that can get you a good wage.
As a success story though, I know a couple of teen moms who went on to finish college and got great jobs. They also had a lot of family support, though.
Good luck.
2006-12-13 05:33:29 · answer #6 · answered by SS90 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When you are 16 you will get critized. I was 16 when i got pregnant. I hated everyone looking at me and calling me names. But dont let them get you down hearted. I got married to my high school sweetheart and people actually was shocked at how good we handled everything. We have a brand new home ( I am 23 now) and my husband works everyday of his life to support us. You just have to live life for yourself, I am a wonderful mother and i dont think any thirty year old could do better. My hubby and I actually have another child now and are thinking about having another baby. I think as long as we can afford it that we have an advantage being young because we have energy and can relate to what a child needs. I say good luck to you and things can turn out great when your a teen mom. My life is great and i wouldnt change it for the world. Just show them people that disagree with your decsions that you can handle raising this child and finish your education it is very important.
2006-12-13 05:39:20 · answer #7 · answered by Kendra M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think people say that btw, I'm 25 and a single mom, but they say that beacuse raising a child is HARD, no matter what the age. I have a bachelor's degree, full time job, support from babies dad and family, and I still get overwhelmed. This is without, school work added onto it, peer pressure, financial unsurety and a question about what my future holds. At 16, you still have so much you need to do, that older people...not all, but most have accomplished, ie..college, work, own home, car...stuff that you will need to have to be the best possible parent you can be, because hun.. sorry to say, but LOVE ain't enough to raise a baby. I'm sure you will be a good mom, when you hold your baby for the first time, that's all you want to be, but it is so much harder, when you are still have alll the things you need to accomplish still left untouched. A baby makes it harder.. see I want to get my master's degree, but now, I have to think, who will watch my baby while at school, will I have the energy after staying up all night tending to my baby to focus in class, will I have the money.. and I am grown and on my own. That's all. You will be a good mom, don't let anyone, especially a stranger on Yahoo answers tell you different. God bless!!
2006-12-13 05:38:32 · answer #8 · answered by candyred1999 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree, it depends on the person. Some 16 year olds don't even know how to take care of themselves, and are very naive. Because of the naive ones we see, lots of people automatically assume that a 16 year old cannot possibly be a good mother. I definately think that at 16 it's not the best time to go and have a baby. That doesn't mean a 16 year old CAN'T be a good mom, it's just up to the young person to grow up very fast.
2006-12-13 05:31:34 · answer #9 · answered by mama 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think age really matters its just that sometimes when you think of a young girl having a baby, you think that shes gonna get her mom to actually do all the work because she isnt finacially stable...you know things like that. but i've seen women do it. i never count anyone out....unless they're here saying im 12 and im pregnant. thats just scary. in my neighborhood i've seen teens do better then most of the 40 year olds. my aunt had her first son at 16 and everything turned out fantastic for her. she had an *careless* mom, abusive father, crazy bros and sisters. so i cant say you wont be able to do it. i've seen it done. but if you're 11 or 12 then....i dont know. i just wish everyone would stop thinking every teen mother or father is gonna end up on welfare. i've never actually seen that done by any of the teens i know. they're strong so you should be too.
love jen.
ps. and if you have a mom like mine you'd better be able to take care of that baby....i wouldnt have any other choice. LOL.
2006-12-13 05:36:14 · answer #10 · answered by Jennie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋