People rarely believe me when I say that I have no friends.
Good friends I used to have all moved far away, immediately after graduation. Some went into the military, others went off to college and ended up getting married, having kids, careers, etc. That's just life. People drift apart.
I don't have any friends at all. I haven't for a long time. I have some acquaintances, but that's as far as it goes. I don't have anyone I can call up and chit chat or hang out with or anything like that. It's very difficult to meet new people.
Why is this so difficult for people to believe? Is it that unusual?
2006-12-13 04:40:12 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Sociology
No, that's not hard to believe, and I think it's fairly common (but not made public so much).
People may believe you, but I bet their reaction stems mostly from their desire to lift your spirits by acknowledging who you DO have in your life, seeing what little blessings are really there. Folks will say they have no friends when they do, they just don't have one close enough, or they're on the outs with some friends, or simply not all that fond of those they have.
Back to you, tho'. Keep active doing things you enjoy or you'll really limit the chance of meeting folks who share your interests. While you're enrichening your mental health by being busy (outside of work), others will see you. I bet after some exposure, you'll have contacts which might develop.
Best of luck.
2006-12-13 04:51:50 · answer #1 · answered by Zeera 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not hard to believe. I believe it, all my friends moved away have careers, kids, etc too. When you're not in the same career, or have kids it's kind of hard to keep in touch. When you work allot it's even harder because you have no time for outside of work stuff.
Sometimes you have to just move on and try to make new friends in what little spare time you do have. Chatting on line is a good start. If you currently have a gym membership and see "acquaintances" at the gym go a step further and ask how their day was, if they give you a short answer, no sweat, you're making progress.
If you're not worried about having someone to hangout with every once in a while then don't let it get to you. And if they can't believe you that's their problem.
2006-12-13 13:01:06 · answer #2 · answered by rokthunder 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm in the same boat. No friends, only acquaintences. In my case, mental illness and alcoholism have prevented me from having a social life.
It's not unusual to have no friends, just uncommon. What is unusual is your concern about what people believe about you. Why should you care that if some people don't believe you're a loner? What difference could it possibly make?
Something's definitely wrong, but it's not your solitude - it's your preoccupation with what other people think about you. If I were you, I'd see a counselor and/or psychiatrist.
2006-12-13 19:42:02 · answer #3 · answered by almintaka 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I am there to
friends are hard to come by
acquaintances are many
I don't hang out with no one I don't even have family (I have my wonderful daughter who is 7)
I think it's hard for people to believe because people like to think the people they know are their friends and maybe for you, you do not trust just anyone...I say that because you separate acquaintances and friends and they are different, nothing wrong with that (I'm that way)
I don't think it's unusual, just you haven't come across anyone like yourself
but maybe with this question you will find many are the same
2006-12-13 12:58:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok the truth is that there are people out there that believe arguing with you or telling you something is deiffferent than it is makes it different. i have an aunt who wants to believe that she and my niece were so close when niece was little and now my niece has just turned. they wer never close. it is what she chooses to believe. You can not argue with people like that. they have their own view of reality and by god that is it your wrong and if you disagree witht heir perfect world YOU aRE WRONg.
Its just thejm. look i would not go around going i have no friends. its kinda like being overweight..... if your not going to diet, why go on an don about it. Join some clubs volunteer. Invite people you know casually as aquatinces to do stuff to get to know them.
I know it is hard. I have had a hard time in past cause i thought well they arent going to like me. Finally i realized at the endx of the day it was only important if i liked myself. :) my niece a couple of years ago gave me the greatist compliment. She said that i did not care what anyone thought of me, And good news , nine times out of ten i dont. i try to be a good person, i try to treat people as Iwould want to be treated and have relaxed. ive met some good people. And the people who dont like me, ahhh well wish em well i have more important stuff to do.
2006-12-13 16:15:53 · answer #5 · answered by Miss Johny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol...yeah i think its a little hard for alot of people to believe when you say you seriously have NO friends at all... alot of people are also shallow and would CONSIDER those aquintences to be true friends.... i also have very few friends but i have always been the type to only have one or two close friends at any time my best friend has been my best friend for 14 years even when we lived in different states or didnt talk for months at a time (up to a year before) we have always been friends and gotten back in touch.... but really i only have that one friend and we dont really have to many personal conversations or anything more just call up say hey how are you how are the kids?..lol
so anyway i understand.... but i think it is a little unusual perhaps
2006-12-13 12:50:45 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it's hard for them to believe because people consider their acquaintances as still being friends. Perhaps you should say that you have no close friends or close relationships.
I understand how hard it is making friends though.. luckily you have access to the internet so you have an advantage. There's many people in this world looking for friends, but I was always told that once you stop looking (actively looking).. they'll find you.
2006-12-13 12:46:24 · answer #7 · answered by moonmarquette 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it's possible. you should call you old friends and tell them to hang out sometime. i'm 22 and i've been with my bf for over 6 years. i lost many friends, since i never did want to go out anymore. this past year. i have been hanging out with my old highschool friends very other weekened. it' so fun. you should alos try making friends in myspace or party lines. also a good way of meeting people is at work , school, or other events. you can even make those acquantances as your friends. invite them to a club or have a party and just strat from there. good luck.
2006-12-13 12:48:14 · answer #8 · answered by ASHLEY 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't find it hard to believe, because that's me... All my friends are far away, and I don't meet that many people that I want to hang around with. People say they don't believe you because they are trying to cheer you up with " Oh come on, you have friends"! And as the saying goes..."You have to be a friend to have a friend". Let me know how THAT goes!!!!
2006-12-13 12:46:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe you.
Most people don't want to be bothered by the problems of others. That is why they choose not to believe.
2006-12-13 18:05:57 · answer #10 · answered by Clown Knows 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋