we just decided to seprate today!and i do not want to ask him to back and start again!im just controling myself not calling him and ask him to come back!i do not want to cry also!i want to live alone without him!but do not know how i can do it!?i love him yet but i think its the best for both of us!
2006-12-13 02:56:15 · 21 answers · asked by student 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It is a bit scary when our worlds change, but change is good and necessary for growth. Your life will be different and there will be an adjusting period that you will just need to get through, if this separation is by your choice just try to remember that things between the 2 of you that have made you separate at this time will not go away or get better. You have made the choice to have him leave... (This is the hardest part by the way) stick with your decision and by this time next year you will be able to look back and see how far you have come and how life has changed for you. Usually for the better. Try to keep yourself as busy as you can. You will feel lonely at times....let it go, that feeling will pass. Good luck with everything. If you don't let it go and move on, you will never know what your life could have been.
2006-12-13 03:14:11 · answer #1 · answered by skipper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do just that. Live your life. Get in touch with yourself again. Get back to doing the things you loved before. It will seem difficult at first. But really isn't. You are taking your life back for a reason. Forget about him. He is not thinking about you. Enough of your life wasted on him. You will find you are loving your life again. Have fun girl. Merry Christmas. You gave yourself the best present of all. Good for you.
2006-12-13 03:01:17 · answer #2 · answered by bountyhunter101 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really feel for you. When you really do love someone, it's really hard to let go. Even when you know it's best. I think you give yourself "quiet" time to cry when you need to. But mostly, surround yourself with a support system. Friends that can make you laugh. Family that can give you hugs. Force yourself out and about to do things you would really like to do. Keep putting one foot in front of the other, and eventually it will get easier. Good luck to you.
2006-12-13 02:59:36 · answer #3 · answered by a_lot_smarter_now 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are ambivalent. They tell you love and hate are opposites, and that you only feel one thing at a time but its not true. You can love and hate someone at the same time. You can want them gone and wish they were there at the same time.
The worst thing you can do is a rebound. Its going to take at least 3 months to get to the bottom, then 3 months to get back up for a total of 6 months before you start getting on your emotional feet. Its easy to get back together in that first 3 months but its really just a rewind and repeat of whatever caused you to break. Its easy to find someone else, and try to use them to fill the void, but after 6 months, your back on your feet and dont want your rebound. Its a little harder, but not having someone for that whole time, allows the fastest healing. When your head gets out of the mist, it is clearer.
Everyone has to grieve, and recover using their own path, I cant tell you what yours is going to look like.
I dont know if you are religious, but Jesus has walked with me through some mighty tough times. He never leaves you, is very upfront about the relationship, and is reliable - he does what he says he is going to do. If your open to it, get a readable bible (not kjv) and read through the words of Jesus. The books of the bible are called books because they used to be separate.. dont worry about order, just read the books that have the words of Jesus. I started with the gospel of John. I didnt let someone tell me, I read for myself. Its something to consider.
2006-12-13 03:05:07 · answer #4 · answered by Curly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if your financially set then you dont have to really worry about that too much......but then again if ur not it doesnt matter anyways cause he'll still have to support you! lol But anyways, just keep going how ur going. No contact helps alot. And other than that keep urself busy! Go out with old friends, and just let it all out! Who knows, maybe even find ur self some young stud with great stamina for the night ;) Sorry not trying to make jokes, just wanna make u smile :)
2006-12-13 03:02:24 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just keep thinking of the reason(s) why you are leaving him. It might be hard to but it is one way to stop yourself from asking him to come back. It is okay to cry if you don't and keep it bottled up it will make things worse in the long run.
2006-12-13 03:02:48 · answer #6 · answered by kitten_cokacola 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really think it is the best, surround yourself withyour best friends and spend a little time on just yourself. Maybe after some time to reflect you'll change your mind, or maybe not, but in the end you'll be more relaxed and confident with your choices.
2006-12-13 02:58:25 · answer #7 · answered by Jennalove311 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Treat yourself to an evening out...have a few drinks, a nice dinner, and, if you are lucky, some nice guy may pick up the tab and then provide you with a distraction from your worries.
2006-12-13 02:58:37 · answer #8 · answered by IGH3Rat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lady take a nice long bath while listening to some music that gets ya...lets say 'a little moist in the
pretty parts. find you;re tightest fitting jeans the one's he always hated and told u NEVER to wear , and top it off with the highest heel shoes u have ..here we call them 'fuge me pumps' i promise at nites end ur ex will be the last thing on your mind!!
2006-12-13 03:07:15 · answer #9 · answered by hydrobudsinfl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do alot of praying for God to give you strength where you are weak & surround yourself with postive people that build you up & not tear you down. Best of luck!
2006-12-13 02:59:34 · answer #10 · answered by "karma" 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋