am i selfish?

Question

i have a guy i like..bt sometimes i dont really lie him. he loves me with all his heart..i sometimes think i dont deserve him cos hes toooo good.
he always says am selfish cos i like doin things for my own personal interests and that i dont motivate him even if he sometimes motivates me.
do u call that selfishness?

Answer 1

I call that being your own person, making your own descisions, if he does not like it then maybe he does not love you like he says or maybe you do not love him as much either. Finding and doing what you want out of life to make you happy is up to you.You are not selfish.

Answer 2

Its not selfish to do things for your own personal interests. Where would anyone be if they did absolutely nothing for themselves.

However, if you are so engrossed in doing these things for your own personal interests, your bloke is going to feel left out and ignored. He obviously doesn't actually minbd you doing these things as like you said, he motivates you. So once in a while you need to return the favour and think about him. Encourage him to do something for himself and be pleased for him.

Though saying that if you don't really like him sometimes then that doesn't really matter. Do you not like him because he calls you selfish? Or is it because you just don't like him? If its the second one, you need to get out. I've been there before. It doesn't get better. It just drives you mad ahnd makes you feel guilty for not saying anything to him about it because they can always tell when somethings wrong and by not saying anything it makes your bloke feel awful coz he just doesn't know what he's done wrong for you to be how you are being x

Answer 3

1. Love happens in freedom to each other, if you are doing things for your personal interest he should not feel bad similarly if he is doing things for his personal interest you should not feel bad . This approach is not selfish rather it is sacrifice for each other and it is the sign of true love.
2. Every time a human can not remain in good mood , so some times if you really do not like him it does not mean that you are selfish.
3. Beloved like you should take care of him in his difficult time , if you are not taking care of him during this period it does not mean that you are selfish , it simply says lack of understanding .

Answer 4

It would be "SELFISH"ness to my own conscience if I were to lie to you and say "No, no, no Honey, you are not selfish!"
This being, I would be selfish because I chose to lie to you to make myself "feel better" by not hurting your feelings, if this is NOT what you wanted to hear. You see?

I think that you should always try to meet in the middle when it comes to your relationship. If you love him, you would WaNt to know what he is in to, and atleast try out some of his suggestions. You have, by your own admission...said that he is toooooo good?...I think you should evaluate whether or not you should maintain this relationship.

Answer 5

No in your individuality you some times forget to compromise. So i would say learn to compromise & and show him some appreation. As long as you are with him you must be giving him part of yourself which does not make you selfish.

Answer 6

You aren't neccessarily selfish. What you have described is how a lot of us feel about ourselves. It's ok to be selfish as long as it doesn't get in the way of your growth and happiness.

Answer 7

You are more self centered then selfish. You will not be able to "keep" him anyway with that outlook on life. So may as well move on and let him go.

Answer 8

honestly, it's pretty hard to judge, but if you feel guilty, then you are. Love is unconditional. But not being stupidly acting like a fool. It's a take and give situation.

Answer 9

U juz answered your own question."cos i like doing things for my own personal interests and that i don't motivate him even if he sometimes motivates me."

Answer 10

Not particularly. If he wants you to motivate him do it because he likes.