family and relationships?

Question

I left my soon to be ex husband in june this year and moved home. I started making new friends using friends reunited and I met a bloke who I really liked. He knew my situation and he said he wanted to help and support me and that he wanted to be with me so we got together. Family was fine with this. Just after I moved back home my mum suffered a brain hemorage was has been on the sick ever since, whilst this happened her partner ( who is an alcoholic) left her. With no money comming in and bills to pay, when I started working most of money was used to keep us afloat. My bro wanted to go to uni, and I also put the money forward for that. About a month ago my mum decided she wanted to go away and felt that the time away from here would help her recover better, so off she went, leaving me the house, the bills and the dog to look after. She is not in the best financial state to say the least, so I was also paying for the rented TV and stuff. With my boyfriend having recently been made

unemployed we only have my income to rely on. When everyone left he moved in. after a few weeks of trying to go on, we realised that financially we couldnt do it and moved into his parents house with the dog. Now my bro and mum are annoyed because they feel I abbondend the situation at the slightest hitch, but They knew I wanted to come home for a fresh start. The arguments between me and my family are causing arguments between me and my boyfriend. I dont want to argue and do love him dearly, he's very special, how can I get him to understand how hard this all is to me? My divorce will be finalised in jan next year, so on top of everything, I have the divorce to sort too. I feel lost and alone, please help me!

Answer 1

I don't know the rest of the story but it sounds like the world is on your shoulders.Only you know whats happening and can sort the problem out.I know you can do it...
Options/suggestions:
Get the ex to pay alomony,get rid of rented tv,cut down on certian things and sell others that you have no use for.Try to not let what they're saying get to you.This was never your responsibility(all the debts)and they shouldn't leave you alone with all the problems.Have a talk with them and if this guy is important,he'll understand.Involve them all!Things will work out eventually.Its just a pity you have to deal with all of this ontop of what you're going through.
Goodluck...

Answer 2

What a nightmare! The most important thing you can do right now is to try to separate the family issues from your relationship. Try not to overwhelm him with it. When you need to talk, tell him, sit down and vent and then move on to something else. Don't let the family drama ruin your relationship. It seems like your Mom and Brother expect a bit too much from you. It may be time to stand up for yourself and tell them you've done the best you could do and now you need some help. I wish you the best with all of this and hope you get it all worked out.

Answer 3

It seems that you have forgotten 1 important thing in the chaos of your current situation - YOU!

At no point do you show any thought for yourself and seem to justify your existence through the actions of others, this is not healthy and you need to seek support for yourself as a matter of priority.

Your partner, mother and brother are adults and are capable of dealing with their own problems. By all means offer support and understanding but make it clear that you require the same treatment from them You are the most important person in your life and you deserve to be treated with respect.

Financial support is available for your family independently. Your mother may be entitled to sickness/disability benefits and should contact the nearest Jobcentre or Citizens Advice for further advice in this matter. Citizens Advice can also offer help with dealing with her debt (NOTE: you have no legal responsibility for your mothers debts). Your brother ought to be entitled to a Student Loan to support him during his studies. He may also consider part-time work. Your partner ought to have received Statutory Redundancy Pay (at the very least) and, if he has no money and is capable of work he ought to sign on for Jobseekers Allowance at the local Jobcentre.

Now think about yourself!!

Good luck.

Answer 4

i do not imagine this is the only determine living house that motives the topics, television is the determine at the same time as the determine is at paintings. What little ones study from television isn't truth. the persons from ignored residences is more desirable the concern. As someone we ought to continuously waiting examples of what reliable loving human beings are. My wager is that the fellow will be very needy and lacking in the abilities it takes to make a courting reliable, both that or indifferent. both way in case you care about someone like this then they are properly absolutely worth the attempt it takes to provide it a go and word what occurs.

Answer 5

Your family should be nuclear not extended. In any case for extended family it is when a serious need arises. This may cause your family seperation, disagree, divorce etc. You have to be very careful. Your family is you, your patner either husband or wife and the children that you have beared the two of you and no other person should be inbetween to put you asurreder. Be careful

Answer 6

Sounds very depressing. Stay strong and resolute - this is just a phase. Restrict the contact you have with your mother and brother. Make a plan for a new start, new job.

Answer 7

spin yerself around anti clockwise for 3 turns, you're not having much luck lately. best to write it all down what you have to do. Then you can focus on when to do it. Keep working hard things can only get better, Enjoy your life, you're where ever you wanna be. Good Luck

Answer 8

Hello, its hard to hear this situation. its your bold mind which is keeeping u like this. its ok. now coming upto the problem.. you r lacking bad communication if iam not wrong! let ur family and ur friend know wat u r facing.......... try to explain them everything.........that too talk 2 them seperately. then make everyone sit together and have a talk abt this. let them know how much importance ur giving to ur private as well as ur personal life....

Answer 9

Worse things happen at sea!

It could be much worse, you could be a one-legged man in a bum kicking competition!

Answer 10

Dump that crap.....It should not be your concern. That is some one else's problem, you have your own personal issues to deal with.