he still talks to me...and it didn't hurt badly...now i even feel gross looking at him....
2006-12-12 13:33:20 · 13 answers · asked by Jessica S 1 in Health ➔ Women's Health
You have to feel something (love, affection) for someone before giving that.
2006-12-12 13:40:05 · answer #1 · answered by Chez 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sex is a deeply emotional thing. Just that fact alone should tell you that it is something that is best shared by two people that truly love each other and are absolutely committed to one another.
Most people these days seem to think that that is a prudish thing to say. But you can't escape your own feelings, and casual and premarital sex very frequently causes more problems than it's worth. Oh, you may think it's great and exciting while it lasts. You may even feel "in love." But afterwards...the feelings that you are feeling start creeping in. Take a step back and look at it not from the standpoint of "I needed to lose my virginity to fit in," or from the standpoint of "I felt like I owed it to him to do this for him," or whatever else. Just think about you and your own feelings. Was this a good thing, not in the moment, but in the long run?
"He still talks to me" is not really saying much about someone who you just had sexual intercourse with. Love? Warmth? Mutual respect? How about those things?
"It didn't hurt badly" is also not saying much. If that is the best you can say about the experience, then that should tell you something about what you just experienced.
I realize that a lot of kids are having sex even quite a while *before* age 19, usually with people that will be out of their lives in no time. I think 19 is usually -- not always but USUALLY -- just too young. I know there were a lot of things going through my head when I was 19, a lot of uncertainties, a lot of peer pressure, a lot of things I thought were right then but turned out to be way off base as I got older and realized more things.
How to move on? Well, first acknowledge that you probably made a mistake. Then resolve to simply BE TRUE TO YOURSELF. Do what is best -- in the long run -- for YOU.
Hope that helps. Take care.
2006-12-12 13:47:34 · answer #2 · answered by CO_Hiker 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Based on your question I believe you may be ashamed of him..OR...you probably feel some kind of guilt for having sex with him. Were you sheltered as a child? Did you grow up in a strict environment where "sex" was not discussed in your home. If you don't want to have sex with him again then move on. That's the solution.
2006-12-12 13:45:42 · answer #3 · answered by J P 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is because you were not ready to have sex, or because you had your first sex with someone you felt was not deserving of you. Next time be sure it is with someone you have know for a long time and that both of you have deep feelings towards each other.
2006-12-12 16:46:24 · answer #4 · answered by mklwis 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were not ready. I believe that a woman should have full knowledge of her body before she is ready to give herself to another person physically. This feeling will pass, but before you have sex again try to understand yourself first sexually. If you are not in committed relationship and just have casual sex you will feel badly about yourself...because you respect yourself and you are just trying to please this other person or trying to gain their attention. Wait for the right guy....you deserve it.
2006-12-12 13:54:37 · answer #5 · answered by BCMEDIC 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to forgive yourself. The guilt is not good for you. Is this guy really important to you? Maybe he wants more; at least he didn't leave after having sex with you.
2006-12-14 03:17:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First time guilt. What wood mama say? U get it on in high school? Spose U r single, obviously. If U get preggers then what? Helpful?
2006-12-12 13:45:35 · answer #7 · answered by Kenneth R C 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Because you truly know that losing your virginity is a serious matter. You know it should be a sacred thing between a husband and wife.
2006-12-12 14:05:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Geez did he azz ram your something.
why would you feel gross looking at him? Is he not attractive but the only guy that would have sex with you or something.
2006-12-12 13:37:34 · answer #9 · answered by Slappin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your attitude is based on what you yourself think about what you did, not that you did anything wrong.
2006-12-12 13:38:10 · answer #10 · answered by de bossy one 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋