My mom is always talking about not having sex before marriage and not having babies before marriage. Well how can she tell me that and she's already having sex with this guy that I absolutely dislike. My mom and dad are divorced and my dad lives in another city in this state. Her "Fiance" likes my twin brothers more than he likes me. ( twins have a different dad than me) My older brother is in the army and he didn't care too much about him any way. The only reason that I deal with him is for christmas and my birthday, but he knows that I don't like him. I'm 16 and still getting spanked. My dad doesn't believe in that though. What should I do? How can she tell me not to do something but she does it? that's not right!
2006-12-12 12:59:37 · 12 answers · asked by Briddy 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
wow at 16 I would say it's tough I'm 35 and I was a single parent of two daughters till about 3years ago and my daughters now 17 and 18(out of the house) it was hard.many girlfriends but no visiting till they were at babysiters.Step-parents are hard know that its hard for everbody to get along.But can you find a ground to where he would just think you are cool with him it would make the strain at home a little more easy for everybody.I hated when my daughters would not get along with my now Wife and many times they think back when it was just us.truly it can work someday, but for now just crawl under a play pen and when they're all gone Crawl out and say Who's house is this! MINE MINE ALL MINE All my Prayers
2006-12-13 15:28:13 · answer #1 · answered by Nicholas M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes life sux. Just isn't fair. Being a teenager - almost an adult - and being in a situation like that is tuff. The best way to mentally survive is to find a peaceful solution - which sounds like you are at least partially doing. You should become Marsha Brady. Seriously. If you're still getting spanked at 16, your mom is probably feeling nothing else will work. Become the perfect daughter. You only have 2 more years until you can move out, and if you spend that 2 years being perfect - you may find your parents willing to help you get set up in an apartment at 18.
I'm not just spouting BS. This worked for me. Many, many years ago, I was a teenager who hated my ignorant parents and wanted nothing more than to be as disagreeable as I could. Someone gave me this advice at 14 and I gave it a try. After a few months, i was getting more freedom and respect. Eventually, when I moved out, they paid my first month's rent.
2006-12-12 15:22:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
16 and still getting spanked I would call the cops man 16 really!
16 ? that don't sound right ! they should not be hitting you like that your damn near an adult . Forget about them having sex they are going to its just like that she is trying to protect you from teenage pregnancy and std's she is older and can deal with them consequences a little better than you but i would tell someone about the spanking thing sounds like an anger issue for them . I feel sorry for you Good Luck !
2006-12-12 13:08:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm sure your mom is only looking out for your best interest. I do see your point though. But let me say this to you, at 16 you might make decisions to have sex with certain boys, but I'll guarantee you that when you're in your twenties which really aren't that far away, you will regret most of the sexual decisions you make today. Believe me when I tell you, that regret can be a terrible feeling. No matter what your mom is doing or saying, you need to make decisions for yourself and do what you know is right in your heart.
2006-12-12 13:08:42 · answer #4 · answered by Jenny D 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
She tells you this because she has your best interests in mind. Trust me, it sucks to wait...but it is worth it and she knows it. Obviously she knows what she is missing out on. You have the oppportunity of a life time to show her how she has done wrong. Whatever you do...choose wisely. Do not make the same mistakes she has made. There is one love greater than one you could ever expect...that is the love of your child. I am 21 and had a child one year ago. I wish I could have been married and given my child a father.....something I will regret for the rest of my life. You know I will tell my daughter to wait...it is what I wish I could have done.
2006-12-12 13:11:34 · answer #5 · answered by editing4u 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
You know what? Yeah, it seems unfair, and on some level, it is.
But the fact is, she doesn't mean "Don't have premarital sex under any circumstances." She means "Don't have premarital sex if you're a teenager."
If she honestly believed premarital sex was wrong, you're right. She wouldn't be doing it herself. And it's kind of wrong for her to mislead you about what she really believes.
So ask her what she really believes. Ask "Mom, do you REALLY think it's wrong to have premarital sex? Or do you just tell me not to have sex because I'm a teenager?" Hopefully she will be honest. If not, tell her what you heard (assuming you weren't trying to eavesdrop ... if it was audible from your room or something, she's inviting questions). Ask her to tell you the TRUTH about what she believes in the future.
Don't accuse her of being a hypocrite or anything. That will just make her mad. In her mind, she's not. She's adding lots of "unless"es in her head when she says that. Unless you're an adult, unless you have kids already, unless you're engaged, etc. Respectfully let her know that you want to hear what she really believes in and practices herself, NOT what her pastor or friends say she should tell you.
I'm guessing the people giving this answer thumbs down are also parents who lie to their children about their morals.
2006-12-12 13:09:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 4⤋
It is important to not have sex before marriage if you aren't ready for an unplanned pregnancy. Your Mother is just looking out for you. And regardless of whether or not she follows her own advice, it doesn't mean you shouldn't still obey her wishes. She's doing the right thing by telling you to wait, it's what any Mother should advise her children to do.
2006-12-12 13:06:39 · answer #7 · answered by Desiree 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Unfortunately hun, she is an adult and can do what she wants. Although you may not agree, there is not much you can do about it. Suck it up for a few more years, finish school and get out. Don't rush into sex just because your mother is having sex. Trust me, you will regret it. Wait until you are in a stable, long term loving marriage.... good luck.
2006-12-12 13:04:56 · answer #8 · answered by ShanaJ 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Listen to her, she's older than you, you're still a chid.
2006-12-12 21:28:02 · answer #9 · answered by daryavaush 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Go have sex and get pregnant if that is what you want, gosh.
2006-12-12 15:13:29 · answer #10 · answered by RearFace@18mo. 6 · 1⤊ 3⤋