We have a secret santa thing going at work and I was really excited about it. It was totally voluntary and was not a big deal if you didn't participate. And there was like 7 days for $1 gifts and one big gift (max of $20) at the end when we revealed who we are. But there is one girl (that no one likes b/c she does things like this all the time) who made a big deal about not being able to afford the limits everyone had agreed on, but decided to participate anyways. Well were just past the third day and I have yet to receive anything. And I found out today (with a little snooping) that that girl picked my name and decided to only do 3 days of $1 and a small gift at the end. So now I feel cheated especially because she is getting gifts the whole time but can't afford $1 a day?!?!? Why would she participate if she wasn't going to follow the rules? (And I work at a job where we all make pretty decent money). How would you handle this without making a huge deal out of it??
2006-12-12 12:59:02 · 15 answers · asked by suzieh212006 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Holidays ➔ Other - Holidays
I am leaning toward wrapping something that I bought for myself and bringing to work and opening it in front of her but it seems kind of petty.
2006-12-12 13:00:01 · update #1
I don't even care about the gifts, it's the principal. And if she couldn't afford it why did she agree to participate in the first place. I don't think I am being selfish at all. I don't know if you guys are familiar with Secret Santa, but the idea is to get the other person presents, not complain and ruin it for the other person. I couldn't care less if she got my a pack of gum everyday - it's the thought that counts!!
2006-12-12 13:10:11 · update #2
A couple of things:
She shouldn't have participated, but probably felt pressured to.
Stuff like this happens. Why not treat yourself to a nice dinner, and not say anything or do anything at work.
It is really better to just let this one drop. You will still have to work with this person and if you make a big deal out of it, then others will think less of you.
2006-12-12 13:07:35 · answer #1 · answered by yardchicken2 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I completely agree about the point that you are trying to get across about how this whole secret santa event is voluntary and if she honestly can not afford a dollar a day then she should not have agreed to join in. It is not fair to the other people who can not afford a dollar a day but are anyways just to try and have fun. If you all make roughly the same amount of money then maybe she has a crack habit or something and doesn't want to share. Maybe she's pawning off her gifts for crack money....either way, personally I would simply confront her and try to stay calm and just bring up the fact that if she could not afford to participate you do not want any of the gifts she will be getting you and tell her not to waste anymore of your time by participating in the game.
It seems to me that the only reason she wants to be a part of it is to get her gifts, who is the selfish one? I think perhaps her more than you, but hey, you must admit you wouldn't be complaining if you were getting gifts...would you?
Oh wait, last minute thought....see if she drives a gas guzzling SUV and then suggest that maybe she could sacrifice 1 dollar of gas tomorrow and go in the store and grab you a cup of coffee for your present that day.......
2006-12-12 13:19:19 · answer #2 · answered by Stormie_Mommie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I see a lot of people here against you, but I'm leaning the other way. It's not like your office culture expects gift giving, this person is not a personal friend or family. Regardless of holiday time and the spirit of giving, she voluntarily chose to participate in a game which cost a certain amount of money. She know how much money was involved in advance. She is wrong for not playing by the rules. Unfortunately, since she broke the rules, someone else (you) got the short end of the stick. I don't blame you for being upset.
Unfortunately, there is not much you can do. Is there one person running the event? Maybe he or she can nicely remind this person of the rules.
2006-12-12 13:12:11 · answer #3 · answered by Raina 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The wrapping your own present up and opening it in front of her is gold. I'd go with that idea. Granted in the big scheme of things it does sound kind of selfish to trivialize over this, but i do agree, she shouldn't have done the secret santa if she couldn't follow through. Just make the gift you give yourself something awsome, and really sell it when you tell everyone how much you love it.
2006-12-12 13:06:31 · answer #4 · answered by kharmageddon74 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand how you would be upset. What a loser I totally agree with you but dont bring your own gift...maybe you should ...confront her about it? ask her if se didnt want to give the gift cuz it was you or if she REALLY couldnt afford it. but just rejoice in the fact that you gave your gift and who knows maybe you will still get the gift
2006-12-12 13:16:59 · answer #5 · answered by spunky_redhead18 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're upset that you've missed out on $3 worth of gifts? Yeah, she's got issues and shouldn't have agreed to participate if she wasn't going to do so within the guidelines, but you're upset over $3 worth of gifts....
Three dollars
Think about it...
It's SO not worth any emotional energy at all...
2006-12-12 13:09:01 · answer #6 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just go along with it. What difference does it make what kind of gift you get or who drew you as their gift partner. I think you summed it up nicely with the word "petty." Plus, serves you right for snooping.
2006-12-12 13:05:57 · answer #7 · answered by soulguy85 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
In the spirit of the season, don't embarrass her. But when she is not looking, steal the stuff she received. That'll teach the cheap, fat (I assume she is fat) beast.
2006-12-12 13:07:08 · answer #8 · answered by SmartAce 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You sound selfish. Maybe she really can't afford it, and your like "Um I want my gift".
2006-12-12 13:01:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
if you really want to stoop that low i would do it too. If she has done stuff like this before i say go for it.
2006-12-12 13:02:55 · answer #10 · answered by bebe 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋