Help, I have no ambition and I'm 25 turning 26 Jan 3. I'm a good looking guy, with a big heart.?

Question

I am 25 turning 26 Jan 3, I don't think I have ambition or a plan and I have a beautiful girlfriend with a child which is not mine. I need help finding something that will attract my attention or help me become more ambitious. I feel that I've become lazy and incompetent. I'd love to make good money, but I don't want to work hard, yet I know those 2 sentences don't mesh well together. I never graduated highschool and my girlfriend doesn't know this. I'm ashamed of never finishing off highschool, and I never told her plus we've been together for 5 months. I've thought about telling her, then going into steps. GED - College - Job, However I feel she wants to start a family and become secure in life sooner than later so I fear losing her if I tell her this. My dad owns Liquor Store and I've thought about just working under him and possibly owning the business later in the future, but im unsure what my dad will do with his business. (He wont really say)

Answer 1

Ok dude, it seems as though you have yourself well behind the 8-ball at present.

1. If you have a drinking or drug problem, this needs to stop or receive affective treatment before you will be successful at anything.
2. If you have been in trouble with the law, this needs to stop before you will be successful at anything.
3. If you have a problem with anxiety or depression, you need to seek treatment before you will be successful at anything.
4. When you have eliminated the above, getting your GED or going back to school will raise your self esteem, give you new ideas and help you meet new people.
5. Get a job doing anything. You do not have to retire at Wal-Mart if you develop better prospects.
6. Tell your girl friend the truth. Since you report she is the best thing in your life, honesty is the best policy. Note that you just truthfully disclosed your secrets and fears to an international audience of thousands of Yahoo! Answers readers. Tell them to someone who knows and loves you.
7. Do not count on the liquor store gig. If your father wanted you to be part of the business he would not be ambiguous when asked about your place in the store's future.

I do wish you the best. Consider this experience as the first step to a better life.

Answer 2

Okay, it's really good that you are trying to make positive changes, but you sound very anxious and fear shouldn't be your motivation. Second, I know it may sound extreme, but in a sense, you are already lying to your girlfriend by being secretive. You should have nothing to hide. Don't let shame or regret keep you down. You're barely getting geared up and you're already letting doubt and fear talk you back into your pit. Don't listen to that junk. You keep climbing out of your rut. :)

It seems to me, even though you say you want help with motivation, what you really want is a much less practical answer- a purpose, direction in your life. So, not only do you want to find the answer to the wrong question, but you want the victory without fighting the battle.

It isn't a question of finding something attractive to get you on the ball. At the core, is your uncertainty of your own purpose in life, and it is making decision-making difficult for you. Start with seeking your purpose(s) in life. Because after all, new things always get old. We are always wanting bigger and better, and unless you find deeper meaning in your life, you'll consistently flock to greener pastures in search of those external things that promise a short-lived thrill or rush. Just visualize yourself kind of like a boat being tossed by waves--the waves being all your external experiences that cause you to feel happy or satisfied. But once all that excitement has died down, so has your confidence, motivation and purpose, and you start the search for a new thrill (ambition) all over again.

I recommend two things: (second one is at the bottom) One, you be honest with your girlfriend. If she really does get bent out of shape or even leaves you because of what you tell her, she needs to look at herself as well and not DEPEND on someone else for security, financially, emotionally or otherwise. Save yourself from pain and frustration and realize that no matter how wonderful you may be, you can't make her perpetually happy! No one deserves to have that big a responsibility--to make another individual happy, and that's just what most people don't understand. Anyway, I am a single mother like your girlfriend, so I speak from personal experience.

So, remember to be open with your girlfriend, and two, check out the purpose driven life book and go from there. It may even be available at your library. Hope I've helped.

Happy early birthday and best wishes to you, your girlfriend and her child! It could be your best year yet!!

Answer 3

You need to deal with reality.

So you didn't finish high school. Hiding it from your partner is not a good thing to do.

You have 2 choices..

1. Go back and get whatever academic achievements that you think you need.
or
2. Lots of people have been success full without a formal education. Here's a few thoughts on what you could do.

Home renovation
Auto sales
Real estate sales

Of course in any of these choices or occupations...lazy will not cut it.

A positive mental attitude will work wonders. Only you gets to decide.

Answer 4

OK.......so far you've sort of dragged around but really you dont seem to be bad person.....you have a good lady in your life you are raising a child like your own..............how about looking into the local colleges that offer both GED stuff as well as some directional assistance towards what might be your passion, when you are doing what you are passionate about its not like hard work SO WHATS YOUR passions ???

As for your dads store will really if you had a son sort of drifting in and out of life would you wave a hand around all your hard work and say Son one day this will be yours to sort of amble about and screw up,.............of course not............so why also not look at taking a business management course and ask for him to be your mentor along the way.....................TRUST me once you reach out your hands for a little guidance, you will be amazed at how many people will stop to help you along.

Regards and good luck

Answer 5

It will be hard but i think the best thing is to tell your girlfriend before she finds out and then start applying for steps. Tell her you got it in control and that you will get your G-E-D. perhaps after your done with your g-e-d you should enroll in one of those certificate programs like becomming a medical assistant. I think this is way better then working under your dad. if you girlfriend cannot understand and accept that you have not graduated, she's not the one for u. goodluck!

Answer 6

definitely tell her about your worries and plans especially because they may differ greatly from her worries and plans. also definitely get the GED that will help you tremendously. then just think about what you are interested in, and find a way into that industry, college takes a long time so maybe a certificate in a specialized field would help you more (my bro went to Wyo tech 1.5 years to learn cars - totally worth it). if your dad is avoiding having you take over the business, he is probably planning on selling the liquor store to fund his retirement. You don't sound that interested in it anyway, find your own path.

Answer 7

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