I have major social issues. I have a hard time talking to even close friends and family. I am usually quiet and boring. But, there is one person i know that can bring the "adventurous" and "fun" part out of me, i have fun with her, she has fun with me (which is rare because no one has fun with me)....Here's the thing, my boyfriend doesn't bring this out in me. In fact, i sort of get depressed around him because he is the depressed type and so am i, but yet i care for him...does this mean he is not right for me? if he doesn't bring the fun parts out of me, or does the relationship just get better? i'm so confused (sorry this is so damn long)
2006-12-12 09:53:56 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I'm the same way. I am shy, quiet, and boring. But, I like to have fun and be spontaneous and adventurous. My last boyfriend and I were very similar, both introverts. So, we didn't do anything. Ever. I thought I was dying of boredom. The problem was that I wouldn't do anything without him, so if my friends asked me out, or whatever I would just stay home with him. We have since split up, and now I try to do things I would normally shy away from. I have found it to be rewarding. I let loose, have fun, and do things. It's awesome! So to answer your question, I guess it just depends on what is most important to you. I have realized how important it is to laugh and have fun and to 'live'. I won't find myself in a situation like that with my next relationship. Your relationship won't change unless you tell him how you're feeling, and even then it may not. That doesn't mean you can't branch out on your own a bit and do the things that bring out the fun and adventurous you!
2006-12-12 10:02:39 · answer #1 · answered by sapphire 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
perhaps you are a lesbian??? failing that i wouldn't worry about it. I am yet to meet a person that is not boring. Sadly there is a limit to what people have to say or do with each other. I don't know how long you have been with your boyfriend and quite frankkly i don't care, but lets be honest after ten years the sparks gonna be gone anyway so might as well stick with him. Even if you are married to tom cruise (bit of current affairs for you) your gonna get bored eventually... so stick with your boyfriend or consider the lesbian thing... p.s. this is not your boyfriend replying.
2006-12-12 18:00:24 · answer #2 · answered by jonnie b 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you have this kind of resentment already, imagine how big it would be in 20 years. Sorry to say, but if he does not make you happy, then he's probably not the right match for you. Because like glass, small fractures in a relationship get bigger over time.
2006-12-12 18:01:31 · answer #3 · answered by Cory W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you'll grow out of it. Being social, outgoing and vivacious are not necessarily wonderful attributes. Quiet, Confidant, Reserved, Coherent, Intelligent, Charming, Engaging, etc. are far better. Anybody can pretend to be "adventurous" spontaneous" or "fun" BE WHO YOU ARE. Being depressed and isolated is NOT GOOD.
2006-12-12 18:00:44 · answer #4 · answered by ••Mott•• 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your Yin met your Yang. Your boyfriend is not the one for you, you don't need to be dragged down. Dump him and spend more time with your friend who will help you become the person you really truly are meant to be. Then and only then will you find a guy that completes you as fully as your friend does, but on a deeper and more emotional level.
2006-12-12 17:57:21 · answer #5 · answered by none 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you may love and care for your bf, but he should be somebody who makes you a better person and brings out the best in you. Now if he's not doing this than maybe he's not the one for you. theres so many guys out there if you do decide to move on. you deserve to be in a happy relationship.
good luck to you
2006-12-12 17:58:06 · answer #6 · answered by sexy-cecy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to create an identity that way it will open doors. Like
finding things you like to do.Also go "out side the box" try something you may not normally do, like learning to surf or golf,anything that occupies time.
2006-12-12 18:01:34 · answer #7 · answered by thresher 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well youn shouldn't be with someone who doesn't make you happy or maybe it's not the right to be in a relationship. when you meet the next guy be sure to get to know him 1st.
2006-12-12 18:00:12 · answer #8 · answered by dimples 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump him !!
This is important - you said " ...i sort of get depressed around him . What is the use of having a bf which makes you unhappy?
2006-12-12 17:58:38 · answer #9 · answered by Young 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is what it will be, nice and safe,,,, do you want to be safe or alive? your choice, most people choose safe, i choose to live but living comes at high prices and safety comes at losing your soul
2006-12-12 18:01:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋