My mom talks about other men a lot. She's married and says it in front of my dad. She used to say it jokingly, but now I think it's gotten out of hand. My dad never laughs about it like he used to and I think it makes him feel unwanted, like my mom doesn't love him anymore. She doesn't talk about the other guys too seiously, but she does say stuff like, "Oh he's cute" and "He is so handsome." I feel really bad for my dad. My mom is 42, so maybe it's an age thing like a midlife crisis, but I'm concerned. She talks about my crushes with my too much too. Like, "He's cute. You should go out with him." It's so annoying and kind of makes me feel bad too. It's like she's 13 all over again. I don't know what to do or if I should do anything at all. Help!
PS: No rude comments about this please!
2006-12-12 09:43:14 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
There are some people that say anything that comes to mind no matter what. It sounds like your mother could be one of these.
She clearly doesn't see what it does to your dad or doesn't care.
But for her to do it all the time is to say to him "well you know if only you could look like that you would get my attention too".
Only your mother knows why she does this. You could be right about her attempt to be young again. By saying these things she maybe feels that she is not as old as she is. But I can tell you 42 is not old. Not by today's standards.
If the right time ever presents itself try talking to her about this.
Maybe right after she says something like that say "hea mom why did you say that?" Or even better......" you mean like dad is?"
Don't criticize but just point out what she says as being something you don't like. It is possible she has no idea how she is hurting your dad. But she clearly is hurting you so you need to have her explain why she does this.
2006-12-12 10:05:11 · answer #1 · answered by John B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my gosh sweetie, I'm so sorry you are going through this. You need to get out of that house ASAP! Is there somewhere safe you can go during this time? I'm telling you that FaceBook can be both a good thing as well as a bad one due to this kind of stuff happening (My own hubby was caught this past week communicating with an ex.)I think when people start looking at exes and old loves, they are trying to relive the past and don't seem to think about how those contacts can destroy marriages and entire families. This is exactly why I don't have ex BF's and old crushes as "friends." To me, it's disrespectful to one's spouse, especially when feels the need to hide it. Obviously, if you have to hide it, then you must know you're doing something wrong! Anyway, get yourself out of there and tell another trusted adult. Do you have grandparents, an aunt/uncle? I wish you the best, hopefully your family can get some counseling and work through this or at least end things safely if not.
2016-05-23 15:50:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think it's very rude of your mom to say the things she say's about other men infront of your dad. She's being inconsiderate of his feelings and your in that matter. Perhaps you should step in and tell her it's inappropriate, hearing it from you should make a difference. Take it from me, I'm 42, a wife and a mother of two teenagers.
2006-12-12 09:52:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
((hugs)) You're right...your mom is stepping over the line of acceptable behavior. I'd let her know you think her talking about other men like that is disrespectful to your dad and makes you uncomfortable. As for your crushes, tell her looks aren't everything. Peace :-)
2006-12-12 09:51:41 · answer #4 · answered by me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mother is being inconsiderate and rude. Your dad is probably willing to grin and bear it, even though he shouldn't. It might start a fight between your parents, but if you were to side with your dad, it might help your mom to see how hurtful her conduct has become.
2006-12-12 10:34:07 · answer #5 · answered by rtanys 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh that's not even right honey , your mom shouldn't be acting this way ...so don't let her set any type of examples for you at all. you should just tell her that you think it is not right to do this. and you tell her that you think your dad is being hurt and ask her ..for you will she please stop doing this in front of your dad. good luck... she is going to continue tesing you about your crushes , if you don't speak up an ask her to stop. this too is upsetting to you.
2006-12-12 09:59:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to be told by both your Dad and Yourself how "hurtful her comments are and how they make you feel. They need to be confronted. She's losing her looks maybe and is down playing it on others....
2006-12-12 09:55:43 · answer #7 · answered by M B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try talking to your mom. Have a heart to heart. Tell he how you feel your dad might feel. She just might be oblivious.
2006-12-12 10:08:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell your mother that you think shes being rude by the comments that she makes about other guys
2006-12-12 10:00:37 · answer #9 · answered by sissy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let your mom and dad work it out, your just a kid.
2006-12-12 09:57:13 · answer #10 · answered by ~*~Tessa~*~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋