are you born gay?is it a choice?

Question

interested in everyones view

Answer 1

If i could CHOOSE a simple, easy life, where everyone would not go out of their way to hate me. Where I would be happy, because that's "how I was 'supposed' to be," I WOULD HAVE CHOSEN IT!

Why do you think gay teens have the highest suicide rates? Because its not a choice! We're STUCK this way and whether WE HATE OURSELVES anymore than society hates us or not, we are who we are. We can't change that.

But, you know what? You don't want to hear that, do you? You want to hear, "oh, they chose it," because then the world just makes so much more sense (to you). Then it won't have anything to do with God making people DIFFERENT, it will be easier for you to accept. Well, tough nut because I don't remember every being different, I was always gay and I always have been since I can remember, sorry if that doesn't fit "your world view."

Ask yourself this . . . how easy would it be for you to change your attraction to someone of the same sex? If its so disgusting a thought that you can't imagine, then WHY would it be easy for me to CHANGE to straight? If YOU CAN'T CHANGE YOUR SEXUALITY, WHY DO YOU THINK I CAN?

Answer 2

interesting debate

I am 35 and straight. The first time I heard this question raised (PFLAG meeting) the gays and lesbians were saying that it was a choice, their argument being that if they were born that way, then the establishment may try to label it a defect and look for ways to "fix" people. This group was meeting on the campus of Notre Dame, and their religious beliefs may have also been a factor (Catholics value free-will very highly, and might respect the "choice" aspect more than the "born that way" theory.

Later on, I have heard the exact opposite argument made by gays and lesbians a thousand times over. The vast majority claim they were born gay and had no choice in the way they are. Most agree that their actions are a choice, but that their feelings and emotions are not. This leads to my complicated answer.

You are born either gay, lesbian, bisexual, or straight (and maybe asexual as well). This, however is merely a biological predisposition, which can be influenced by your environment, especially in early child development. Though you have this predisposition, you can chose to behave contrary to your feelings. In other words, you can be gay and live straight, or vice versa. In our society, actions are what we are judged on, and most people would say you are gay if you sleep with the same sex, and straight if you sleep with the opposite sex, so the act and not the feeling is what matters to the outside world.

in the end, these are all just labels, sometimes they apply and sometimes they do not. Who's to say ultimately if someone is straight or gay? Often the person them self doesn't even know.

Answer 3

Well, I'll start off by asking what possible difference does it make...?

But I'll answer your question anyway. There is some research going on now to determine just that, although the current evidence strongly suggests there is a very strong biological component and a much smaller "social" contribution.
The most fascinating study right now is the case of identical male twins from Mass. -- this is such a great "test" case because they have identical original genes, and have had identical "nurture" environments...but one of the two boys is gay, the other is not. That one had more feminine traits was obvious to the parents before 3 years old, and the two have been closely followed.

There *is* evidence that certain gene sequences are more common in homosexual men, but despite the press announcing a "gay gene" a few years ago there is no such thing, and no scientist ever claimed there was. As I said at the beginning, the current evidence points strongly towards a mostly biological but somewhat social "cause"...but this isn't a disease, and it's clear that it's not purely a "choice" either. Like any other human behavior, it's a complex issue with many influences.

davi -- you must not have dogs...boy dogs will hump anything in sight, male, female, human, big rubber balls, somebody's leg...that "female dogs only" statement is SO wrong :)

Answer 4

Well, I used to think it was choice. However, after having kids I realize just how much of our personality is nature rather than nurture.

I have some friends who have kids similar in age to my own. In watching their younger son develop I now truly understand how much gender preference is a part of ones innate personality. This particular kid has *always* gravitated towards traditional girl toys such as strawberry shortcake, the easy bake oven, the girly dress up stuff, etc... Even when playing the other boys will always take on the knights and warriors role whereas this kid will always assume the damsel in distress role (complete with pink high heels and a feather boa from his dress up chest, no less...). I will be absolutely shocked if when he grows old enough to be thinking about sex he is not "queer as a $3 bill". Further, I would not be at all surprised if he eventually decides to have sexual reassignment surgery. I firmly believe that this is simply because that is the way he is and not because of anything the parents have done to influence his preferences.

And, for the record, I have no problem with this. He is a great kid and his family are among my favorite people.

Answer 5

Yes, people are born homosexual, it is something that is simply built into their genetic code. No one knows how, or why this occurs. It's not a disease, or anything that is genetically inherited, its just there. Some people think that people who are gay or lesbian, were perhaps a different gender in the womb until a certain point and then somewhere along the developmental stage of the pregnancy the sex changed again, which is why some people can be born a hermaphrodite (with both sex organs). The choice for them only lies in whether they accept the way they feel or not.

Answer 6

No scientific way to prove it, but just USE YOUR HEADS. Lets look at this, on one hand we have being gay. Take **** from everyone, have unequal rights, get dirtly looks and have christians and rednecks constantly calling you damned sinners who are headed straight to hell. On the other hand we have being straight. Kind of like being gay except with none of the negative consequences. If it was a choice, what kind of an idiot would want to be gay? Since homosexuals are willing to put up with all that crap, I'm fairly certain that it is not a choice at all.

Answer 7

You're born that way. There are a lot of people here that will tell you otherwise, but, I can't imagine "choosing" to be in a group that is constantly ridiculed, shunned, and picked on. I really believe that gay people know from the age where we all discover our sexuality that they're attracted to the same sex.

Answer 8

I find it funny that straight men who disapprove of homosexuality claim its a choice. Gay men who expreience it daily say it is not.

There are 450 species of animal that have homosexual species...did they choose too?

Did those who want nothing more than to be straight and live a normal life choose?

Are the biological differences, brain chemistry, etc. found within homosexuals the result of choices?

It is clearly not a choice. Choice gives people who disapprove something to hold gays responsibile for, and a reason to dislike them.

I'm straight, and could never choose to be attracted to, fall in love with, and want relations with another man.

Answer 9

I believe that if you are gay you are born that way, because I have several friends that are gay and they have felt like that all their lives, besides think of this; how can a little boy or girl when they are waaaaaaaaaaaay too young for puvity, know that they have feeling for the same gender as opposed to the opposite gender?

Answer 10

I think you are born gay. If you had to choose to be normal wouldn't you choose to do it. Not trying to bash anyone its just my opinion and I have a gay family member and he says he was born this way. He told everyone in middle school that he was gay.