Is it normal for married men to surf porn?

Question

I caught my husband surfing porn but what disturbed me was that he has not been showing much interest in me in bed. He claimed that he was tired because of his long working hours but he was not too tired to surf porn at 1 a.m. in the morning. This is driving me mad. My self-esteem is at rock-bottom. Help!!! I realised that he has started lying and he used to be such an honest person.

Answer 1

Anika;
you are going to get responses that tell you it is normal, join him, at least he isn't cheating and all men do it and they have this"need" to spread their seed --blah blah blah excuses..
follow your heart and what you feel you need to do. Talk with him, do not confront him--otherwise you may push him futher into rejecting you and turning toward the porn. Reevaluate your sex life--but talk talk talk and be open and honest of how this feels for you. Most guys just don't seem to get it--they are actually hurting the women who love them when they do this.
If they put the same energy into the woman they are with, they would gain back ten-fold.
Don't compare yourself-don't let it rock your self esteem (easier said than done)
YOU are afterall a beautiful woman and are a REAL woman and not some porn sl*t/wh**e who is never going to be your equal in life.

Answer 2

2

Answer 3

Surf Porn

Answer 4

Hi there~

Yes, I think it is very normal! Men are very visual. It is easy sometimes to just get aroused and do the deed. Us women take longer to heat up.

If he is working a lot of hours, that does not mean he will not get that urge. The porn just helps him get it done faster. Then, off to sleep he goes. I think, they think we take to much work sometimes...LOL

During the day I work as an administrator/bookkeeper/accountant. I work with ALL men! They are crazy. That seems to be all they do is talk amongst each other about sex and surf the net for naked pics.

If it bothers you, you just need to ask him. Communication is key. Ask him why. He may get embarrassed. So, if he gets mad that is why. You need to let him know that you are not mad and that it is okay, but you want to make sure that he is still attracted to you.

Good luck to you! Hope you get things worked out!

Answer 5

Honey I've been married for 30 years. I love my wife, but I have always looked at other women. Now that I'm older I sit on the porch and watch the young dogs do the chasing. I've done my fair share of surfing, but I don't buy porn. The reason I don't? I'm a tightass dutchman, and I know all they are doing is trying to vacuum money out of my wallet. About your daughter. Talk to her. Let her understand that daddys addicted to the junk. Tell her to make sure her bf doesn't fall in the same trap. good luck

Answer 6

yes my husband does it all the time. what you need to do is take him to a sex shop buy some toys and movies and experiment with him. Just think, he promised to have sex with only you for the rest of his life. So you gotta make sure that promise was worth it. You'd rather him watch porn,then cheat. So step up to the plate before someone else does. get a sex swing and try yoga. turn into the freak your husband always wanted, that'll cut the porn down real quick. But don't whine because he is pleasing his curiousity in a healthy way, because you could be on Maury and regret it.

Answer 7

The fact that he is only looking and not acting, makes me think that it is quite harmless. Perhaps he is just a little bored with sex at the moment for some reason !! Then again perhaps he is just tired, he may not be lying about that at all. Speak to him and tell him exactly how you feel about his loosing interest in you, let him know how much it upsets you. Maybe he feels that you do not show him enough interest in the bedroom !! I can't see that watching porn would be too tiring, it may just help him to unwind ! Just talk to him and maybe you will get the answers that you need. Good luck

Answer 8

It makes sense actually for men to surf porn. Many women don't like to be used as soley a sex object. The husband can hundreds to thousands of photos of women in various situations that he would feel that his wife would either NEVER do or would take a LOT of romancing to do. Porn is an inexpensive way for the husband to see what he wants without all the trouble of asking or convining the wife to do it.

Ever see the movie "Frankie & Johnny" with Michelle Pfeiffer and Al Pacino? http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0101912/
There is a scene where the Al Pacino charater asks to see the Michelle Pfeiffer character's body. They are already seeing each and all he wants to do is view her body. She puts up a fuss and he left to argue why he should be ALLOWED to see it. Sometimes men just don't want to jump through the hoops and porn gives us what we want without the hassle. I can understand how that can be seen as threatening to women who try to make themselves the sexual monopoly in the relationship.

Answer 9

I am not so sure that it is normal, but it is common. Maybe he is just in a boredom rut and the two of you need to do something to spice up the sex life. Surprise him with some sexy clothes or nighties, maybe a striptease or something. I would not suggest going to the strip club, but something at home. Maybe you could do something like take some sexy pics of yourself and put them on the computer to surprise him, or make a homemade porno to spice things up. Try new things in the bedroom, or different places that would excite him. You have nothing to feel low about, this is not your fault. He just has a problem with boredom and is trying to fix the rut, help him fix it. A marraiage is a two sided adventure. Maybe have help him to act out some fantasies, this may turn out to be as much fun for you as for him. You may even try to be more assertive in the sex department and try the new things on him. Blind folds can be exciting, maybe just a dropped towel as you walk past him or a nude dinner just surprise him.

Answer 10

surf porn with him, then act out some of the thing you see. all men look and like porn it has nothing to do with you